Since She Went Away(79)

“And I’m worried about Bobby,” Ursula said. “His dad was murdered. Even if I’m mad at him, he’s a good friend.” She looked down at the ground and kicked a small rock out of the way. When she spoke again, her voice was lower. “I have a lot of reasons.”

“Sure,” Jenna said.

“Don’t you want to go on?” Ursula asked, turning to Jared.

“I do,” he said, his voice low in the cold night.

“Look, Jenna, you just have to do the right thing here,” Ursula said. “You just do. It’s one of the best chances we have to find this guy. And we need to find this guy. We all benefit. We can learn what happened to Mom. And Natalie.” Ursula lifted her arms and then let them fall to her sides. “We have to.”

Her voice grew faint, disappearing into the traffic sounds and the soft whooshing of the wind through the naked trees. Ursula looked small, more like a child than a teenager. The wind lifted her hair, brushing it across her face.

Jenna closed the distance between them, reaching out as she came alongside Ursula. She’d known her since the day she was born. Had held her and changed her, babysat for her and bathed her. She placed her arm around Ursula’s back, felt the girl stiffen at her touch.

“This isn’t easy for any of us,” Jenna said. “Maybe you’re right. But I’m not crazy about any of us going on TV right now. Maybe we can reach out to a different reporter. I’m not getting burned by Reena.”

Ursula’s body remained stiff, as if infused with iron. But Jenna didn’t let her go.

“I just want it all to be over,” Ursula said. “You know? I just want it all to be over. I’m sick of this limbo life we’re all living.”

“I know,” Jenna said.

She felt the girl soften a little under her touch. Ursula didn’t give in and fully accept the hug, but she moved closer to Jenna, her body easing in.

“Your mom . . . she loves you very much,” Jenna said. “I’m sure you know that.”

Ursula closed her eyes. Jenna thought tears would come then, bursting out through the girl’s closed lids. But they didn’t. She kept that look on her face for a moment, and then slipped out of Jenna’s grasp.

“Do you want a ride?” Jenna asked. “I drove and it’s cold.”

“I’m meeting a friend.”

“Will you call me if you need anything?” Jenna asked. “You can. I hope you know that.”

Ursula stopped on her way to the side of the band shell, the place she’d emerged from minutes earlier.

“I need this to be over,” she said. “That’s all.”





CHAPTER FIFTY-FIVE


When they returned home, Jenna approached the house cautiously.

Domino55 might be around. Whoever he was.

Jenna carried her pepper spray in one hand and insisted on walking ahead of Jared.

“Shouldn’t I go first?” he asked. “I’m supposed to be the man of the house.”

“Not until you pay rent,” she said. “Until then, I’m the man of the house.”

But there were no problems. No sign of anyone lurking in the bushes. No sign of any break-in. As Jenna slipped her key into the lock, the bright glare of the porch light illuminating her work, a police cruiser rolled by, the extra protection promised by Naomi Poole.

Jenna breathed easier as they went inside. But she still made sure to turn the dead bolt behind her, to do whatever she could to keep out everything that needed to be kept out.

Jared went out to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. He slid containers and jars around while Jenna stopped behind him, leaning against the counter.

“Do you want me to make you something?” she asked.

“I’m good. I’m not really hungry. I’m just looking.”

“I feel terrible for Ursula,” Jenna said. “She seemed so alone. So small and lost.”

Jared took out a jar of pickles and closed the refrigerator. “Sure. You’re right.” He opened the jar and started munching, pickle juice dripping onto the floor.

Jenna pointed at the mess.

“Sorry,” he said and leaned over the sink. “She’s . . . yeah, I feel bad for her. She lost her mom. She’s trying to get by as best she can. I should be sympathetic when she’s cold.”

“I need to do a better job for her,” Jenna said. “I hope getting back in touch with Ian allows me to do that. Celia would have liked it, don’t you think?”

“You talking to Ursula? Or Ian?”

“Ursula,” Jenna said quickly. “Well, both.”

Jared shrugged and took another pickle from the jar. “Sure. I guess.”

Jenna’s phone rang. She looked at the screen. “Shit. It’s Naomi.”

“So?”

“I jump out of my skin every time she calls.”

The phone kept ringing.

“Not answering it doesn’t change whatever she has to tell you,” Jared said.

Jenna watched him wipe pickle juice off his chin. “When did you get so wise?”

She took the call.

“Can I bend your ear for a minute?” Naomi asked.

“Is something wrong?”

“No, no. There’s no news.”