Signal to Noise(42)

He knew he’d talked about this a million times before, but he liked to hear himself say it. It sounded more real when there was somebody listening to him. Like it could really happen; that these were not the ramblings of a kid. He had the guidebooks; he had the maps; all he needed was a bit of money.

“Cool.”

“You should come with me,” he said.

Meche sat on the floor of his bedroom, stretching her legs and smiling.

“All the way to Europe?”

“All the way. We can run away together.”

“I think we tried that three years ago.”

“We went to Coyoacán without permission. Daniela forced us to turn back and kept bawling her eyes out because she was afraid her dad would find out she had skipped class.”

“It was pretty silly.”

“No, but we should do it. This time for real.”

“What the hell would I do in Europe?”

“What wouldn’t you do?” he said, sliding down next to her. “It’s not like we’ve got it super amazing here in Mexico City.”

Really, what was there for them? For him? This miserable apartment. The school where nobody liked him. Isadora, who didn’t even know he existed. The accumulated tedium of hundreds of days piling on top of each other.

“Yeah, but going looking for the midnight sun sounds...”

“... crazier than casting spells with records?” he asked. “I don’t think so.”

“It sounds cold.”

“We’ll buy parkas. Blankets. What do people wear in Norway?”

“Bear furs, probably. What do people eat in Norway?”

“Bears.”

Sebastian laid down on the floor, his hands behind his head. Meche also lay back, her hands folded over her chest.

“People don’t eat bears,” Meche said.

“They do. But you shouldn’t eat polar bear liver.”

“Why not?”

“It’ll make you sick. Too much vitamin A.”

“You’re making it up.”

“I am not. I read it somewhere.”

“There’s a song by Ella Fitzgerald called Midnight Sun,” Meche said.

“Everything is a song with you.”

“At least it’s not bear meat.”

Sebastian felt himself getting sleepy. This was their usual banter. This was their usual selves. He could relax now. He could be happy. The pain gnawing him all day long would subside.

“How does the song go?”

“Mmm... let me see,” Meche said. “There’s a meadow in December, ice and oh darling... something about lips close by. People kissing basically...”

Meche coughed.

“Of course, she sings it much better than I do,” she concluded.

“You’ll have to play it for me sometime.”

“But jazz is boooring,” she said, imitating him.

Sebastian let out a loud hmpf and turned his head to look at her. They were side by side, but Meche’s legs were pointed in the opposite direction and she was tapping her foot to the beat of an imaginary tune. Probably Fitzgerald’s song. She was staring at the ceiling.

He pictured Meche walking down a long hallway, towards an airplane. She was ahead of him by a long stretch. With every step he took the distance between them seemed to grow until Meche was just a tiny little smudge against a bright opening. Then she was gone.

“Can I ask you something?” he said.

“What?”

“Something serious.”

“Then definitely not.”

Meche glanced at him. When he didn’t laugh, she turned her body completely towards him, leaning against her elbow and looking down at him.

“What?”

“Promise you’ll never leave.”

“Leave where?”

“Anywhere,” he said. “Without me, that is.”

“Gee. Should we stitch our sides together like artificial Siamese twins? Hey, isn’t there an episode of the Twilight Zone where that happens? Or is that the one of the guy with two heads?”

“I’m not kidding.”

Sebastian sat and looked down at her sternly. Meche looked like she was about to laugh. But then she nodded instead of chuckling.

“Alright.”

“Never go.”

“I won’t.”

Sebastian hugged her and did not understand why he suddenly felt so sad. He closed his eyes.

“You’re lying.”

“I’m not.”

He thought he could hear the chords of a song. Fitzgerald’s song as he imagined it without his ever having heard it. Slow and lovely and somewhat painful.

“There is a Twilight Zone episode called Midnight Sun,” he said as he stood up, offering Meche his hand.

“What’s it about?”

“Earth has moved from its orbit and is heading into the Sun. Everyone will be cooked alive.”

“Creepy.”

He pulled her up and Meche smiled.

“Let’s go for a ride,” he said.

They trotted downstairs and grabbed the motorcycle. Meche jumped behind him and placed her hands on his shoulders, then rested them on his waist.

“Ready?” he asked.