Safe from Harm (Protect & Serve #2)(36)

“Oh!” she said, laughing a little at her own presumptiveness. “I thought—” She bit off her words before it was too late to take them back. She’d honestly thought he was talking about wanting her to make the first move. She took a deep breath—and a step back.

He grinned, actually flushing a little, and glanced up at her through golden lashes, giving her a look that was completely devastating.

“Did you think…?” He cleared his throat and fought to hide a smile. “Did you think I was going to kiss you just then?”

“Oh, no,” she said, waving away his words. “No, of course not.”

He got to his feet, bringing him back to within a breath away from her. “Would it be so bad?” he asked softly, his gaze searching hers.

She blinked at him, trying to pretend she had no idea what he was talking about. “What?”

“Kissing me,” he murmured, the back of his finger caressing along the edge of her jaw, making her pulse trip over itself. “Would it be so horrible?”

Her hand came up to rest on his waist, and her lids drifted shut a moment. Horrible? Hell no. It would be sheer bliss—and something she’d craved ever since first tasting his lips. But she took a deep breath and let it out slowly, forcing herself to get a grip on her libido. “It’s not a kiss that worries me,” she told him, tired of denying what had happened between them and worrying about whether or not he remembered. She needed to get it off her chest. “It’s what comes after—or, more accurately, what doesn’t.”

His brows drew together in a frown. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Well, since he asked…

“It means you only want me because you can’t have me, Dawson,” she said. “As soon as you get want you want, I wouldn’t be any different from any of the other women you’ve had. You’ll move right along to the next.”

He cringed a little at her words. “No wonder you think I’m an irredeemable jackass.” He laughed, the sound edged with bitterness, and shook his head, resuming his seat on the desk. “Don’t worry about me trying to kiss you again. You’ve made it perfectly clear you wouldn’t piss on me if I were on fire. I sure as shit can take a hint.”

She gave him a sad smile. “The thing is, Gabe, you have kissed me. You were just too smashed to remember it.”

His face went slack, his surprise impossible to disguise. “After Chris died,” he murmured. “That happened.”

“Yeah, it happened. And then…” She raised her arms out to the side. “Nothing.”

“I thought it was a dream,” he told her.

She laughed bitterly. “Oh, that’s a good one. A dream? Nice try, Dawson.” Then she blew out a frustrated sigh and held up a hand, cutting off whatever response he was about to give. “You know what? I think I’ll just go. Just email me whatever you have.”

“Elle—”

“I’ll see you around, Gabe.”

“Elle!” Gabe called. “Would you hold on for one goddamn minute?”

When she turned back to face him, she was surprised to see him standing right behind her. Before she could say a word, he grasped her around the waist and jerked her toward him, claiming her lips in a harsh, savage kiss.

Elle stiffened, taken aback, but then his hand came up to cradle the nape of her neck and his lips grew gentle, tender, stroking hers. The desire she’d fought against blossomed in the center of her, its warmth spreading through her body, filling her, overtaking all logic and reason. She kissed him back, pulling his bottom lip into her mouth, scraping it gently with her teeth, drawing a low moan from him as his kiss deepened.

Her arms slipped around his waist, her fingers splayed along his muscled back, and she leaned into him, fully surrendering to the strength of his arms, the sultry caress of his lips against hers. As their kiss slowly drew to a close, she kept her eyes closed for a moment, taking the time to try to bring her breathing under control.

Gabe pressed a kiss to her cheekbone, her temple, near her ear. “Jesus, Elle,” he whispered, his breath feathering across her skin. “Kissing you is even better than I remembered.”

She pulled back slightly, lifting her gaze to his. “But I thought you didn’t remember.”

He shook his head slowly, tucking her hair behind her ear as his gaze searched hers. “I thought what I remembered was just a dream—and that’s no bullshit line. It’s the truth. I was so out of it that night, I seriously thought maybe I’d just imagined everything that happened between us.”

“Why didn’t you say something?” she demanded. “Why didn’t you bring it up?”

“Why didn’t you?” he fired back without missing a beat. “Put yourself in my position. I was going to look like a total jackass no matter what I did. Asking about it because I wasn’t sure if it’d happened would’ve pissed you off. Clearly. And if I’d said something and it hadn’t happened, you would’ve thought I was off my fucking nut.”

She had to admit, he had a good point. Why hadn’t she said anything to him about it? “When you didn’t say something, I thought what happened didn’t mean anything to you.”

He closed his eyes for a moment and rested his forehead against hers. “Oh, honey… You couldn’t be more wrong,” he murmured. “Do you have any idea how many times I’ve dreamed of kissing you, holding you?”