Rules of Survival(33)

“You can trust me,” I said in my Shaun voice. I even bobbed my head for increased effect—even though no one could see it. “And I am the man.”

I sighed and stretched out my legs, index finger running along the edge of the chain. “I have this weird memory from when I was a kid. Like, this watery thing that’s always in the background. I asked Mom about it once and she blew it off. That’s how I knew it was real. Not just some weird random nightmare…”

I stopped and held my breath, listening for signs that he was waking up. There was nothing, so I continued. “It’s more than a memory, too, ya know? It’s a feeling. A heavy, nearly paralyzing feeling. Any time things get too quiet, it’s there. Just creeping up to smother me.”

An involuntary shiver rocketed up my spine. I’d never said this to another living person—not even Mom. Sure, Shaun was out cold—and that’s probably the only reason I was able to do this—but it was weird. Like admitting weakness. And that wasn’t allowed. It was one of the rules. Always stay strong and show no fear.

“We were hiding somewhere,” I said, voice softening a little. “I don’t know where, but it was dark. And small. We were really squished in… Mom had her hand over my mouth—and not just resting there. No, it was clamped down tight. I almost couldn’t breathe…”

More listening. Still nothing.

“She whispered in my ear. Told me whatever I saw, to stay absolutely still and don’t make a sound. She sounded so scared—I’d never heard fear in her voice like that. It scared me, so I whimpered. Just once. So quietly…”

The memory took over and I was swept back to one of the most terrifying moments in my life. A moment that made so much more sense to me now that I knew our running hadn’t been only about her criminal past.

“She panicked, I think. Covered my mouth even more. Even tighter. I was so small and her hand was so big—it covered my nose, too. I couldn’t breathe so I tried to struggle, but she held me down. Everything got dark, but before I passed out, I saw it. The thing we were hiding from. Him… Or his shoes, anyway.” I laughed. “Lame, right? To be afraid of shoes?”

“I understand,” Shaun whispered.

Every muscle in my body locked up, and I could have sworn my heart stopped. He was awake? He’d heard the entire thing? I couldn’t respond. I couldn’t even breathe.

But I didn’t need to. Shaun spoke instead. “I don’t like the silence, either. It always brought—bad things.”

I wanted to ask him what he meant, but he didn’t give me an opening.

“You’re really brave, you know? All the things you’ve had to do just to live.”

My heart jumped a little. Sad but true, it was the biggest compliment anyone had ever given me. “If something as simple as silence turns my blood to ice and transforms me into a useless blob of goo, how is that brave?”

Warmth covered my hand. “How did you turn into goo? You were down here in the dark—in the silence—and you dealt with it.”

Then I remembered the early part of my conversation. My Shaun imitation. Oh. My. God. I wanted to die. I’d called him hot. Had he actually heard that part? “Yeah, by having a two-way conversation with myself…”

“So? You took a paralyzing fear and owned it instead of letting it own you. Doesn’t matter how you did it—that’s huge. There aren’t many people who could do that.”

“Really, it’s a lame way to deal…” I wanted to change the subject. Badly. For the first time since we’d gotten stuck here, I was thankful for the darkness. I’d bet all ten of my toes that my face was bright red.

Thankfully, he took the hint. “So…what happened? Where are we?”

“I’m not entirely sure. The ground caved in, I think. We fell.”

Material rustled, and the chain rattled and clinked. “Fell? Fell into what?”

“Some kind of hole.” I glanced up toward where the opening was—or should have been. Whatever it was had sealed behind us, closing out any light and essentially locking us in. “Maybe it’s a well or something?”

“Can you stand?” Shaun asked. I felt the cuff tug to the left, then up, and did my best not to whimper. I was going to look like an abuse victim by the time we got these things off. My wrist was swollen and sore and probably a pretty awesome shade of blue and purple by now. It was a surprise I could even still move my fingers.

“Yeah.” I climbed to my feet, using the wall as a guide. It was smooth—too smooth to be the inside of a well. Definitely not dirt. Wherever we were was man-made, and that meant there might be a light. Right arm extended, I started in front of me, then slowly began to work toward the right, hand running up and down the wall. “First things first. We need to see. Try to find a light. Then we can figure out how to get out of here.”

“Good plan,” Shaun said.

We worked our way around the room in silence. I felt like I should say something. I’d just spilled my guts to the enemy. That wasn’t a thing you could just brush under the rug, right? I took a deep breath. I needed to do damage control. “So—”

“Bingo!” Shaun shouted, jerking me to the left. A second later, a small faux flame flared to life. He’d found a camping lantern sitting on top of an old rickety table. It wasn’t much, but there was enough light to finally see where we were.