Rev It Up (Black Knights Inc. #3)(58)

A sheen of tears pooled in her eyes. “That might be the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard. Delusional. But sweet all the same.” She leaned in to kiss him, then pulled back before their lips could touch. Her eyes were huge and wary. “Jake? Is the…uh…are you still wearing a condom?”

Huh?

He reached down between them but was relieved to discover the little plastic ring fully intact and right where it should be.

“Yep,” he pulled out of her, then stared in horror at the remnants of the condom. Which wasn’t really a condom anymore, just a ragged piece of latex dangling around his junk. “Ah, shit,” he said at the same time Shell squealed and vaulted off the mattress.

She pointed at the broken condom like it might grow teeth and bite her. “Wh-what the hell, Jake?”

“Hey,” he reached for her. “It’s okay. These things happen.”

“Not to me,” she swatted at his hands. “These things don’t happen to me.” Then she turned away and bolted into the bathroom, muttering something under her breath he didn’t quite catch.

He sighed when he heard the lid to the toilet slam up followed by the sound of her relieving herself. He wanted to tell her urinating after sex as a way to fight off pregnancy was just an old wives’ tale, but she worked in the medical field, so he figured she knew a lot more than he did about such things. Besides, if the last look on her face was anything to go by, she wasn’t in any mood to hear his helpful observations.

The sound of the toilet flushing was immediately followed by the hiss of the shower turning on.

Now he figured it was safe to venture forth.

Strolling into the bathroom, he found her bent over the tub, adjusting the temperature. The sight of her bare ass, all beautiful and heart-shaped, had his cock twitching.

Of course, the thing always had been stupidly optimistic.

He was fairly confident there’d be no more playtime tonight. And when she spun to glare at him, hands on hips, accusatory fire shooting from her eyes, he went from fairly confident to 100 percent certain.

“How old were those condoms?” she demanded, her full breasts jiggling slightly when she stuck out her chin.

“Um,” he scratched his head. “Two or three years, I think.”

“T-two or three years!” she sputtered. “And you thought it was okay to use them?”

“I wasn’t thinking at all at the time,” he admitted, taking a step toward her, but she only waved him off. “I guess I just assumed they were like Twinkies. Had a shelf life of, like, a thousand years or something.”

It was at that moment that her eyes zeroed in on the offending prophylactic still decorating his happily erect cock—Come on, she was standing there naked. There was nothing he could do about it. It was evolution. Woman plus naked equals erection—and now she was the one reaching for him.

“Why are you still wearing that useless thing? Just to tick me off? Get rid of it!”

“Okay, I—Hey! Ouch! I’ll do it!” He turned away from her very un-gentle hands and peeled away what was left of the condom.

When he turned back, she snatched it out of his hand and glared at it. He was surprised the thing didn’t burst into flames. Then she tossed it toward the trash like most guys toss a hand grenade before jumping into the shower and slamming the door closed behind her.

“Look,” he stood outside the semi-transparent glass. “What are the chances you’re pregnant? Where are you in your cycle?”

The door slid open with a snap. “I’m a week past my period, and I—”

“Okay. Okay, that’s good, right? You shouldn’t be ovulating, yet.”

“What the hell would you know about it!” she said, her face contorted with fear and something that looked very much like rage.

Was he missing something here? She was overreacting a bit, wasn’t she?

“Look, if you are pregnant, we’ll deal with it.”

She blinked and opened her mouth, then seemed to think better of whatever it was she about to say, because she slid the door shut in his face, mumbling something he couldn’t hear above the hiss of the shower.

He reached up to open the door when a snippet of music had him rethinking his move. “Uh, Shell? I think your phone is ringing.”

“It’s in my clutch,” she said in a tight voice.

“Clutch?”

“My purse, you big Neanderthal.”

Okay. Obviously he was missing something here. Because in the space of about five minutes, he’d gone from Jake, again and Jake, don’t stop to Jake, you big Neanderthal. “Does that mean you want me to answer it?”

Once again the door snapped open, and she glared at him. “What do you think it means?”

He sighed and shook his head, completely flummoxed as to why this was all his fault, before he turned and strolled, er, limped back to the bedroom.

Ouch.

He cupped his abused dick in one hand while digging through her little purse with the other. When he located her iPhone, he saw Boss’s name on the screen and decided to answer it himself. “Yo,” he said, “what’s up?”

“Snake?” Boss’s voice was tight, and Jake’s instincts kicked into overdrive. He bent to grab his jeans.

“Yeah. What’s the problem?”