Razor: A Bad Boy Stepbrother Romance(42)

“I’m sorry, Carly, but what was I supposed to do? You were my stepsister and I had no idea that there was any chance of us ever being together.”

“So you screw a bunch of chicks instead of just being honest? How does that logic work?”

“Even if we could’ve been together, our relationship wouldn’t have lasted sneaking behind our parent’s back. You know what would’ve happened the first time we got caught? They would’ve separated us, made us feel like we were disgusting human beings. We probably would’ve ended up hating each other.”

I thought about how much my mom already made me feel bad about a multitude of things in my life and found myself agreeing. “I guess I see what you’re saying.”

“Those other girls — they meant nothing to me,” he assured me, seeing me lost in thought. “Absolutely nothing. In fact, I always felt empty and disgusted afterward. It was like a void I could never fill.”

His words touched me even though I should’ve been annoyed.

“Yet you kept doing it?”

Mason pursed his lips. “I was hoping that I’d eventually find someone who would erase what I felt for you, someone who could fill that hole. I never did.” Mason squeezed my arm gently. “In a way, I think part of my rebellion against dad had to do with me not being able to have you, my subconscious at work.”

It amazed me to see the serious side of Mason when it came to expressing emotions. It was something I’d never seen him do. He always had some smart ass comment or joke to deflect.

“Well have you found someone now?” I asked, giving him a firm kiss on the lips.

“Now I have,” Mason affirmed, pulling me close and allowing me to nuzzle against his chest.

In that moment, I didn’t care who was after Mason. The only thing that mattered to me was that I was once again safe in his arms.



Mason





What the hell am I doing?

I stared at the gentle rise and fall of Carly’s shoulders as she lightly snored against my chest. She’d fallen asleep shortly after our discussion, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I was still in awe that we’d slept together. Even now, with her naked body pressed against mine, it was hard to believe.

Sex with her was everything I thought it would be. When I’d penetrated her virgin hole, it felt familiar, like I was home. Like I was finally where I was supposed to be.

The hole inside of me had been filled.

But now I had another problem — crushing guilt.

Not for sleeping with my stepsister. I didn’t give a rats ass about that anymore. I felt awful for the danger I’d put Carly in for my own selfish needs. On top of that, I’d taken her innocence and I wasn’t convinced we could have a future together. If it were any other girl, I wouldn’t give it a second thought.

I can’t stay here, I thought. Carly will never be safe with me.

Gently removing Carly’s arms from my chest, I slowly slipped out of bed. The floorboards creaked as I stepped on them and I froze, cringing.

Carly let out a small snort in her sleep and mumbled something unintelligible before rolling over.

I sighed with relief, hoping that I’d worn her out enough that she was in one of those deep sleeps. I stealthily continued, putting on my clothes and moving to the kitchen area. I grabbed a pen and scribbled out a note, instructions I wanted her to follow.

Outside, I mounted my bike and moved it manually down the gravel driveway, not wanting to start the motor anywhere near the cabin in case it might wake her up. If Carly confronted me, I’m not sure if I’d have the willpower to leave.

A heavy weight settled on my chest as I took one last look at the cabin. Fuck, I didn’t want to go — Carly would hate me. Shit, I hated myself.

But I would hate myself more if I took Carly with me and something happened to her.

At least I could take one last memory of Carly with me, the memory of being with Carly for her first time. And no matter where I ended up or what happened, no one could take that away from me.

“I’m sorry,” I muttered.

Walking the bike out to the road that led back to civilization, I hoped on, started the motor, and sped off into the night.



Carly





I awoke with a start, a dreamy smile on my face, and looked around. The room was completely dark, letting me know that it was nightfall. I felt the bed around me and was met with emptiness.

Mason was gone.

I must’ve fallen asleep, I thought. And Mason probably got bored and went into the living room to watch TV.

How he hadn’t fallen asleep right along with me, I had no idea. Having so much sex completely wiped me out, but then again, Mason had a lot of experience in that regard.

The memory of our steamy encounters filled me with desire and happiness.

And to think, I have that look forward to every day, I thought giddily.

Still, I was worried that I was letting my elation of being with him blind me to the problems we faced.

Don’t worry about it, I told myself, not wanting my doubts to ruin the mood. I’m sure if we both work together, we’ll make it.

I rolled out of bed and stretched, yawning lazily. The first step toward the dresser to grab some clothes had me grabbing at my side.

Shit.

I was sore as hell.