Priceless (Forbidden Men #8)(88)

This was his world, the portion I’d never been a part of. He worked here like the normal, average guy he was, had arranged dates here with beautiful, perfect women like the one he was talking to right now. And I...I knew I was his friend—his best friend—but I also knew I didn’t belong here.

I’d told him—freaking promised him—I never expected him to give up his other women just to become exclusive with me or to fall in love with me and want the real thing between us. So why the hell was I here, thinking just that had happened?

Whirling back around, I rushed for the exit, trying to control the sudden shallowness of my breathing as I fumbled to escape. Once I hit the cool night air, the breeze hitting my cheeks let me know they were wet.

Crap. I was crying. Why was I crying? I’d had the most magical night with Brandt. He’d given me everything I’d begged from him, and he’d made me feel special and cherished. I couldn’t have asked for more. So why was I upset?

I knew he hadn’t cheated on me with Julianna. And even if he had been with her, I had no right to feel crushed. I’d promised him I was fine with our night being a one-time deal. I’d promised him nothing between us would change. And even if he wanted more, wanted a real relationship where we—I don’t know—moved in together, I just...suddenly I didn’t want to do that to him.

No matter how self-reliant I tried to be, I’d never be a low-maintenance girlfriend. To any man. I had special needs, and with me, he’d always have to find the handicapped options, build the ramps, lower cabinets, alter his entire freaking life. I didn’t want him to have to adjust to that...just for me. I wanted him to be happy and as normal as possible.

I wasn’t sure why seeing him at work—with her—made all this hit me the way it did, but it really freaking sucked. And when I got home, I snuck back to my room before Reese could see me, and I bawled most of the night.

The next day, I woke to a text from Brandt. All he did was tell me good morning and say he couldn’t wait to see me again, but it made me sob through my morning shower. He really was the most amazing person I’d ever met. And he deserved the best, a woman he would walk, run, heck—dance—with. Someone who could keep up with him and take care of him as much as he took care of her. He deserved someone way better than me.





SARAH




This had to be the worst case of self-doubt I’d ever experienced, and I hated it. But for the life of me, I just couldn’t break free of it.

I think Brandt realized I was freaking out too. He kept messaging me, asking for the next spot of free time I had so we could meet up, either on campus or off. When I kept putting him off, telling him I was busy, he finally asked if everything was okay.

It’s fine, I answered. I’m just cram-packed this week. Getting nervous about finals.

You’ll do fine on finals...just like you do every year. Give yourself a break. No, give ME a break. I need some Sarah time. I need Socrates!

His words warmed my heart yet made me feel worse all at the same time. He made it sound as if I could fulfill his every desire, but I knew that couldn’t be true. I was just...me. Sarah. I wasn’t enough to keep a man like Brandt Gamble satisfied.

I ended up telling him, Soon, to which he spit back, Make it sooner.

Yet I still managed to avoid him until Friday evening.

I was sitting in bed, trying to study yet failing because I was so stupidly miserable, when my phone rang.

When I saw it was from Brandt, I tensed. He’d texted all week and hadn’t called, so it’d been easier to push him off. Hearing his voice might be different. Biting my lip, I debated on whether to answer. I set the phone down, only to pick it up and reluctantly press it to my ear.

“Hello?”

“I knew it!” he growled. “You’re f*cking avoiding me.”

“What!” I rolled my eyes. “Oh my God. I am not.” Clenching my teeth at that lie, I added, “I answered the phone, didn’t I?”

“And you totally paused, having to debate whether to talk to me or not.” He sounded a little hurt and a lot pissed all at the same time.

Hating that I might be upsetting him in any way, I groaned before saying, “Did not. You’re being paranoid. Stop being paranoid,” all the while promising myself that I’d stop avoiding him from here on out. He was still my best friend, no matter what.

In my ear, he growled, “You promised nothing would change.”

“And nothing has changed,” I argued. Fuck, I was really going to have to be an actress the next time I saw him, pretend my heart wasn’t broken because I wanted more things than I knew I should have.

“Except you’re avoiding me,” he pushed, making me lose it.

“Dammit!” I exploded. “I am not avoiding you. This is me trying to prove to you that I’m not going to turn into a clingy psycho stalker and expect you to fall flat in love with me, give up all other women, and ask me to marry you. I’m giving you space...like a good best friend.”

There, that set things straight.

Or so I thought.

“No,” he boomed right back. “You’re f*cking avoiding me. You have never avoided me before. That’s different. Things are changing.”

“Oh my God, you’re such a pain in the ass.” Why, oh why, couldn’t he have just dropped it? “If you want to see me that bad, then come over and see me already. Jesus Christ.”