Preston's Honor(21)

He looked thoughtful for a moment before he put his hands in his pockets and glanced up at the moon. He seemed especially pensive tonight and reminded me of his brother. “Are you okay?”

It was still strange spending time with Cole without Preston there. I was so aware of his absence—probably even more so than if I’d been completely alone. Although it was funny because I hadn’t felt that way when I’d spent time with just Preston.

“Yeah, I’m fine. We’re, uh . . . we’re leaving in a couple of days.”

I stopped and turned to him, startled. “A couple of days? I thought you were leaving mid-August?”

He ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. “Our dorm opened up earlier than we were originally told it would, and Preston thought it’d be good to get out there and look for jobs before school started.”

My heart sank. “Oh. Jobs. Right . . .” I licked my lips, a sense of panic filling my chest. I blinked at him. “You’re here to say goodbye.”

He nodded and it was the first time I thought I’d seen an expression of sadness etched into the lines of Cole’s handsome face. “Yeah.” He looked off into the distance for a moment before meeting my gaze again. “I could have borrowed my dad’s truck tonight but I kind of just wanted to walk. I’ve been walking through town, just . . . remembering. Feels so strange to know I’m going to wake up somewhere other than here for the next four years.”

I took a deep, calming breath. Despite my sadness, I was happy for them. “You’re finally getting out of here,” I said, offering him a weak smile, the only one I could muster at the moment.

He smiled back and took my hand as we started walking again, giving it a squeeze. “I’m going to miss this place,” he said, grinning wider.

I tilted my head and looked at him sideways. “Yeah? Where are you gonna be?”

“In a college classroom, gettin’ myself educated.”

I laughed softly, squeezing his hand back. I was happy for Cole, truly and deeply. This time the joke we’d always laughed about wasn’t a joke at all, but reality.

We turned out of town and started walking slowly down the dirt road that led to his house and the turnoff for the road to mine.

The luminous moon cast a glow on the miles of farmland stretched to either side of us, the hills in the distance a dark outline against the indigo sky. “Are you going to miss it here at all?”

He shrugged. “I’m going to miss you.”

I smiled. “I’m going to miss you, too. This town is going to seem so much smaller when you’re gone.”

“Without my larger-than-life personality?”

I laughed softly. “Yeah, actually.”

We walked in companionable silence for several minutes and before I knew it, we’d reached the dirt road that separated us in more ways than one.

“Here we are,” I said softly, feeling a sudden overwhelming sadness. This was goodbye. I had no idea if this was goodbye forever, if he would go off to college and forget all about me, or if I really meant more to him. I wasn’t na?ve about the parties and girls college would offer him. And Preston.

Cole turned to me and took me in his arms, lowering his mouth to mine. He pulled me close and kissed me deeply, his tongue twisting with mine. I tried to lose myself in the kiss but only felt half-involved. It was the last physical contact I’d get for a long time, possibly forever, though I refused to consider that dismal possibility too closely.

When we parted, he smiled and looked at me for several moments, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. I couldn’t make out his exact expression in the dimness of the night but it looked thoughtful, and for a moment, I wondered if he was going to make note of there not being a spark between us. “I know we barely got started, Lia, but wait for me.”

I tilted my head, our bodies still pressed together. “Wait for you . . .” I repeated, surprised. My thoughts had been going in such an opposite direction.

“Don’t give yourself to someone else.”

I let out a rush of breath and pulled away. Did he really have no idea how few friends I had? “That’s not likely, Cole.” I was only fifteen, but even so, the only boys who had ever even given me the time of day were Preston and Cole. And that might be mostly because we’d been friends since we were little kids.

I shook my head. “But . . .” I paused as I gathered my thoughts, “you have so much living to do. This is your dream. Enjoy every second of it to the fullest. For both of us, okay?”

He smiled, leaning in and kissing my forehead. “Okay.”

We lingered in our goodbye but finally it was time to go. I turned and walked away from Cole, looking over my shoulder once to wave back to him. But he’d already turned in his own direction.





CHAPTER FIVE


Preston – Eighteen Years Old



I’d watched from a distance as she’d tilted her head back and laughed, her hair flowing in thick curls down her back. I’d watched as my brother took her hand and begun walking her home, my guts twisting with jealousy.

I leaned back on the seat, taking in deep breaths of air. I’d come to say goodbye and hadn’t realized Cole had the same idea.

I’d avoided her since that night in the Laundromat. It hadn’t been difficult. We were so busy on the farm, and Cole and I felt like we needed to help Dad as much as possible before we were both gone, leaving him short, leaving him to handle the things we’d always done. He’d hired a couple of guys to do the work we’d been doing but still, he was going on sixty-two—it was time for him to be slowing down, not working harder than ever.