Playing the Player(73)

After what seemed like hours, Alex finally rolled away from me, panting and exhausted.

“Okay,” He lay on his back, breathing heavily and staring at the ceiling. “Now we can have a conversation.”

“Fuck you,” I gasped, kneeling on the ground with my head between my arms.

He dug into in his backpack then threw something that bounced off my head.

I picked it up, staring in shock. “What the hell? Is this your cup? You threw your f*cking jockstrap at me?”

His laughter echoed off the walls, and I let myself join him, as the knot in my stomach finally loosened.

“I’m starving,” he said.

“You’re buying, *.”

“Deal.”



After we showered and ate enormous burritos at Chipotle, Alex and I stood in the parking lot saying good-bye. He had spent our whole meal trying to convince me to forgive Trina, or at least listen to her.

“Give her five minutes,” he said as he unlocked his car.

“That’s five more minutes than she deserves.”

He glared at me. “Where are you going now? A party? A midnight hookup?”

I shrugged. “Home.” A stack of chick flicks and a tub of ice cream waited for me.

He smirked. “You’re going to OD on lame-ass movies, aren’t you?” Alex said. “You’re totally still in love with her.”

“Piss off.”

He laughed, flipping me off as rolled down his window. “Five minutes!” he yelled as he drove off to meet Tim.

At least somebody’s love life wasn’t a train wreck.



At home, I opened the dresser drawer where I’d shoved Trina’s torn-up letter after rescuing it from the trash can. It was next to the necklace I’d bought her, the one I’d planned to give her the night of the Red Rocks concert before everything fell apart.

I’d never read the letter, and I couldn’t return the necklace since it was engraved. But I was keeping both items as a warning, something to stop me the next time I was stupid enough to think I was in love.

Five minutes? I wouldn’t give her five seconds.





Chapter Forty-Seven


Trina


Sunday, July 28

I’d spent the past week doing lots of soul-searching, when I wasn’t dealing with two kids who missed Slade almost as much as I did. I rode my bike aimlessly, listening to music, but I had to be careful which music, since so much of it reminded me of Slade. I practiced swimming at the rec center, always first making sure his car wasn’t in the parking lot.

I spent time at the shelter with Sharon, who was full of sad smiles and reassurances that even though my heart was broken, some day it would be whole again. I didn’t believe her.

Even though we were over, I still wanted the chance to apologize to him. To let him know how wrong I’d been to take the secret deal, and how sorry I was. I knew I couldn’t undo my mistakes, but I wanted to tell him one last time that none of my time with him had been a charade like he’d accused.

But he wouldn’t give me the time of day, even though Alex had argued with him and Desi had blown up his phone with texts and calls.

So that’s why I was sitting on his front porch, waiting. His parents were gone; I’d texted his mom to make sure of that before I came over. The fading warmth of the setting sun on my skin comforted me as I tried to convince myself this wasn’t an insane idea.

Alex texted me that they were at the pool, which closed at eight, so Slade should be home soon. I was grateful that Alex was my ally. He’d explained to me about the bet, that it had never been about an actual hookup. And I believed him.

I leaned back in the wicker chair and closed my eyes, clutching the envelope. It was a last-ditch effort to let Slade know how I felt. At least after I gave it to him I could walk away knowing I’d said my piece.

The roar of his car in the driveway startled me. My eyes flew open and locked with his as he turned off the engine, staring at me. We stayed like that for a long moment, then he flung open the door and stepped out. He stood there in all his sun god summer glory, but his expression was guarded and cold, more like the god of winter.

“What are you doing here?” He slammed the car door and stalked toward me, making my pulse beat out a panicked rhythm.

I stood up, ready to make my getaway. “Here.” I thrust the envelope toward him.

He frowned, crossing his arms over his chest. “I’m not reading any letters from you, Trina.” He raised stormy eyes to mine. “I threw away the other one. Never read it.”

My heart shrunk in on itself, and I wondered if I’d come on a fool’s errand after all. I bit my lip and took a breath. “This isn’t a letter. It’s for your binder.”

His eyes narrowed. “I threw that stupid thing away, too.”

Think, Trina. What’s your Plan B?

The Plan B genius stood in front of me, looking like he’d like to throw me in the trash, too.

“I know you hate me, Slade. And I don’t blame you, but I just…just wanted you to know how much…” But I lost my nerve, and my voice.

“How much I what, Trina? How much I screwed up as a nanny? Is that what’s in the envelope—your final report for my mom?”

His words cut me like shards of glass, lancing my already broken heart beyond what I could bear. “No,” I whispered, backing away from him. “No, that’s not…”