Play Maker(53)

“It’s so cool!” Mikey said as a greeting.

“You like the game?” I asked, guessing that was what he was referring to.

“Yeah, yeah!” he told me, his enthusiasm audible.

“Did you and Mom pick a movie for us to go to tonight?”

There was a pause and then I heard some murmuring and then all of sudden my mom was on the line.

“Nicole?” she asked.

“Yeah, Mom?” I was confused why Mikey had handed the phone to her.

“Mikey doesn’t seem to want to go to the movies,” she told me. “He wants to play the game for a while longer. I thought we would order a pizza and spend the evening in. He said he’ll teach me how to play.”

“Oh.” I tried not to be disappointed, even though I knew it was good for him to find new activities to get excited about. And my mom sounded excited too. They really didn’t get much time just the two of them to do fun things together. I realized that I had a tendency to take Mikey out of the house on my day off and I never invited my mom to join us. I was so used to it being just the two of us that I hadn’t even thought to ask if she wanted to join us. Besides, I always expected that people who didn’t know Mikey as well as I did would want a break from him.

I realized then that I wasn’t giving her nearly enough credit for all she had done these past few months. And she seemed genuinely excited about spending some one-on-one time with Mikey. I felt a wave of guilt for being so dismissive of all of her previous attempts to bond with him. I was still trying to protect him. But now I wasn’t doing it for him. I was doing it for me.

“Are you and James having a good time?” Mom asked.

“Yeah,” I told her honestly. “We’re having a great time.”

“Well.” There was a pregnant pause. “If you want to stay out, I can put Mikey to bed tonight.”

I didn’t know what to say. A part of me wanted to tell my mom that there was so much more she needed to know about Mikey’s bedtime routines and that he would freak out if I wasn’t home.

It had been Mikey and me for so long. What would happen if he had someone else in his life who could take care of him? Was I keeping my mom at a distance because I was worried about him or because I was worried about me? About what it would do to my relationship with my brother if he didn’t have to depend so completely on me. If there was someone else to lighten the load.

I watched James up at the counter, looking at the t-shirts and mugs they had on sale. How might I have responded to James if my entire life wasn’t centered around my brother? If I let myself make decisions based on what I wanted for once, instead of what I thought Mikey needed? Because clearly, he was perfectly happy to spend the evening at home with my mom playing video games.

“Can I talk to Mikey for a second?” I asked my mom, waiting until he came back on the line. “Hey buddy, Mom says you guys are going to get a pizza and play your new game tonight.”

“Yeah!” he said, and the excitement in his voice made me smile. “She said we can get pepperoni. And we’re going to fight Lord Vortech together!”

“That sounds great,” I told him. “I think James and I are going to spend some more time together today. Are you ok with that?”

But I could hear that Mikey’s attention was already focused somewhere else. “Mmmhmm,” he muttered. “Ok.”

“I might not be back until the morning,” I said tentatively. In the past, when I had tried to stay out with friends or former boyfriends, Mikey had been incredibly upset. But that’s when I had to ask neighbors to check in on him. Our mom was going to be with him the whole time. “But I can call you to do the list before bed, if you want.”

“Ok! Call me later!” Mikey said and then hung up.

I stared at my phone for a moment. It looked like I had the evening off.

“Everything ok?” James had returned, and he was wearing a Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles baseball cap. I couldn’t help smiling.

“Nice hat,” I told him.

“I’m glad you like it.” He pulled out a bag from behind his back. “Because I got you one too.” He plopped the cap down on my head. “Looks good,” he informed me.

I tucked my hair behind my ears, realizing that I didn’t really have an excuse anymore in regards to James. Because the truth was that I liked him. And I did want to spend time with him. On a regular basis. And he wasn’t going back to London, and I had someone who wanted to help out with Mikey, so what was holding me back?

I looked up at James, who was admiring the Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles mug he had gotten as well. He looked like such a tourist, it was kind of adorable. He seemed to realize I was watching him and looked up.

“Hey,” he said. “Ready to go?”

“Actually,” I pulled out the placemat with the waffle checklist. “I think I made a mistake.”

“Oh yeah?” he leaned over my shoulder, looking at the list. “Where?”

“I think the waffles here should get extra points for the fact that they are also served with fried chicken.”

“Well.” He rubbed his jaw thoughtfully. “I guess I can see that.”

“Which means that the waffles here are the better ones. Which means,” I looked up at him through my lashes. “Which means that you won the waffle competition.”