Pennies (Dollar #1)(71)

No odes of promises to come back or hints that he’d request to share me again. He’d had his one night and been honest enough that I wasn’t enough to capture his attention.

His words sharpened until they glittered with stinging barbs, delivering venom into my heart.

Don’t hate him.

Don’t die with hatred.

If that was the only pleasure I had, at least I knew what it felt like.

I have to tell No One.

I have to write it down so I never forget.

Mr. Prest would become a figment of my imagination, locked forever in my toilet paper novel.

I wouldn’t tell anyone about him.

I wouldn’t grow to know him or care for him.

Just one more reason why I would remain silent forever, holding my secrets.

Until the end.





HOW DARE HE f*cking throw me out!

Did he think our deal would proceed as planned after such bloody rudeness? Did he honestly think I wouldn’t rip him into motherf*cking pieces for the lack of respect he’d shown?

I’d hurt him for what he’d done to Pim, but I’d kill him for what he’d done to me. No one was permitted such intolerable insolence.

If he’d given me a few more minutes, I would’ve walked out the damn door on my own accord.

I would’ve run because of his slave.

That kiss…shit.

I should never have done that.

Big mistake.

Huge f*cking mistake.

And now, Alrik had committed his own.

Dawn had only just broken, but I wanted out of that white hellhole. Touching her? Tasting her? Fuck me, it was more than I could handle. I had no intention of being alone with her again because I knew my issues and I knew what would happen if I did.

I was glad she belonged to another.

This way, I had no way of going back for seconds.

For an awful moment, I’d wanted him to shoot her. I pictured the bullet tearing into her brain and the light in her eyes snuffing out. She’d be gone and I’d be granted absolution.

If she was dead, she was free from me and Alrik.

I was so f*cking close to letting him pull the trigger.

But even though the right thing to do was put her out of her misery, I didn’t have the balls to have her death on my conscience.

I already had enough shame to devour me.

I couldn’t handle anymore.

No, I left because she wasn’t my problem.

Her life—no matter if it was full of hell or happiness—was not my issue.

She’s. Not. Mine.

I had to believe that and accept it if I had any chance of being somewhat sane.

I’d had my fill.

Done.

Over.

“Sir?” Selix leapt from the car as I stalked toward him, slinging my jacket on. The pockets crunched with things I’d pillaged as I did up the middle button. The poor guy (true to his word) had spent the night waiting. He knew I preferred to do business on my own. I could handle my safety if a double cross went down—I didn’t need him for that. But I was grateful he was here to get me as far as f*cking possible from this place and Pim.

She’ll be hurt.

Not my problem.

He might kill her.

Not my problem.

When I’d taken her upstairs, I’d done so with the promise to kill her afterward.

I hadn’t kept that promise.

What did it matter if it was me or Alrik who finally did it? Who cared if I was there to watch or back on the ocean where I belonged?

Fuck!

Selix cleared his throat. “Everything okay?”

Nothing’s okay.

“I want to leave. Immediately.” I jerked hands through my hair. “Is the yacht ready?”

He opened the rear door. “Yes. All prepped and ready for sail.”

“Good. I want to leave this shitty country as soon as I can.”

“I’ll call ahead. Make sure we leave the moment you step on board.” He closed the door, encasing me in the black sedan before dashing to the driver’s side.

Taking one last look at Pim’s prison, I muttered, “Take me to Phantom. Now.”





DEAR NO ONE,

I don’t know what happened.

All my notes and confessions to you…they’ve vanished. Did you take them? Please, tell me you took them. I can handle that. Tell me you’re sick of me writing to you, and you flushed them down the toilet, or burned them, or tossed them out the window.

Tell me anything as long as it isn’t that Master A found you.

Don’t tell me that!

They were there before breakfast yesterday. I checked.

I didn’t check last night as Mr. Prest kept me company.

But now, I’ve lost you.

I don’t want to lose you!

Oh, no. I hear him coming.

Shit, No One…what if he—



“You damn little bitch.” Master A shot across the room, snatched up my letter, and shredded it into confetti.

No!

My heart screamed as if he’d murdered a living, breathing friend.

“All this time, you’ve been writing and hiding it from me!”

Stop!

I cowered, slipping off the bed to bow on the floor. Any humanity and self-awareness I’d earned thanks to a few hours with Mr. Prest disappeared. I slithered back into my role as slave, pressing my forehead against the carpet.