Out of the Ashes (Sons of Templar MC #3)(76)

His eyes searched mine. “Your real folks?” he asked.

I was surprised at this curiosity; he was genuinely asking. I couldn’t help but laugh without humor. “Who knows, probably wherever they can get the most drugs for the lowest price—rotting in the same trailer park I grew up in, most likely,” I said bitterly.

Zane jerked slightly and his eyes turned hard.

“Steve and Ava were everything to me. They were the only people to give me unconditional love, apart from Lexie,” I said honestly. “My parents,” I scoffed, “I’m loath to even call them that. They didn’t give a shit about me. I was merely a way to get some more money on the benefit, get their next fix,” I told him. “That’s why they fed me enough to survive, clothed me so I didn’t freeze. See, if something happened to me, I got taken away, so would a payday.” I shrugged. “I’m luckier than a lot of people I grew up with. They didn’t hit me, didn’t abuse me. Just barely acknowledged me.” I met his eyes, which seemed to be glittering. “I took care of myself since I was young enough to be able. Got out of there as soon as I could.”

I skipped the part where I jumped out of the frying pan and into the fricking fire. Fire I didn’t even notice until it almost killed me.

Zane was silent for a long moment. “Then Lexie?” he guessed correctly.

I smiled. “Then Lexie. Best thing that has ever happened to me,” I told him honestly. Though the person holding me was quickly coming a close second. Not that I said that.

He seemed to search my face for a while. “Her dad?” he asked blandly.

I tensed. Zane hadn’t asked me once about Lexie’s father, which I had been glad about. He seemed to be protective of her since before we were anything, but his protectiveness didn’t seem to translate to a need to know about her father. Until now. My movement was not lost on Zane and his arms tightened around me. He frowned down at me.

“Babe,” he said as almost a warning. There was no getting out of this one. I knew I had to tread carefully. Not only because the truth would no doubt turn Zane into a mindless macho ball of fury, but because the truth needed to stay buried. For my safety. Or more importantly, for Lexie’s.

“Lexie’s dad was the first escape I ever got. First show of affection of love I ever had.” I paused. “At least my fifteen-year-old brain thought it was love.” I looked at Zane. “He wasn’t from a family like mine. They seemed happy. Loving. Normal. Something I craved. And when I got pregnant they weren’t angry, they supported me. Supported us. Moved me in, much to my parents’ dismay.” I wrinkled my nose at the memory. “It was the first time I’d seen them pay an extended amount of attention to me,” I told him. “Thought it was because they finally decided they loved me, finally muddled through their drug-addled brains to find some affection for their only daughter,” I scoffed. “Like always, they weren’t worried about me, but their paycheck.”

Zane’s arms stayed tight around me and his gaze burned into mine. He silently urged me to continue.

“His parents…Lexie’s dad’s,” I was careful not to say his name. “They sorted it. Moved me and him into a house next to theirs. Lexie was born, best day of my life,” I declared. “Never thought you could love someone that much,” I smiled. “I thought I finally had a family. It was okay for a while.” I struggled not to get gripped by the memories, not to go in too deep and betray too much. “Then it wasn’t. So I left. With Lexie, then found Steve and Ava. They only had one hotel then, wasn’t much but I was desperate for a job to feed me and my baby.” I didn’t add I was desperate for a hiding place. “And all of the big places wouldn’t take on a kid with no experience. Ava and Steve did. Gave me somewhere to stay, a job, a way to feed my baby.” I paused, trying not to choke up. “Finally gave me a family,” I said quietly. “Gave Lexie the most precious thing ever,” I added.

Zane stared at me for a long time, his gaze hard and soft at the same time. His hand moved to lightly trace down my eyebrow to my jaw. “Didn’t think you could get any more magnificent,” he said hoarsely. “Stand corrected, Wildcat.”

The reverence in his gaze, the emotion behind his words did it again. Even amidst the grief and sorrow, another little broken piece inside me melded back together.

The softness of his gaze didn’t last for long. “Lexie’s dad. Wanna elaborate on what made you leave him, babe?” he asked with a hardness to his voice that wasn’t there before.

I swallowed. “The blindness of first love wore off. I saw him for who he was, what he was,” I said honestly, hoping I didn’t have to lie too much. I couldn’t, not in this moment.

Zane’s face hardened in suspicion, in a kind of pre-rage. “What was he?” he bit out through clenched teeth.

I knew if I told him the truth his rage would consume him. He would probably try and find Lexie’s dad. No, he almost certainly would if I told him the whole truth. Whatever had happened between us lately, that pivotal change had showed me just how far he would go. I knew he would kill him if he knew what had happened all those years ago. As much as I wanted the * dead, I couldn’t risk it.

“Not who I thought he was,” I said simply. “I realized he didn’t love me, didn’t love Lexie. Didn’t want a family, wasn’t what we needed so I left,” I lied.