Origin of Magic (Dragon's Gift: The Protector #3)(44)

Her words triggered a memory of Moira demanding that I return. I stepped back from the door and gestured my mother inside. “Come on in. There’s something I want to ask you.”

“Of course.” She stepped inside.

“See you later.” Cass grinned, clearly happy to see me with my mother.

Del smiled, too, and waved goodbye. I shut the door behind them. My mother looked around my apartment, clearly interested but also baffled by the TV. She must not have seen many of those on her trading expeditions.

Finally, she ignored the TV and turned to me. “Are you all right? Learning to control your magic?”

“Kind of.” Guilt tugged. “Well, not really. It’s going to take practice. But things are happening.”

“I wish I could help more.” She frowned. “But you’re the only one with this gift.”

“Because Elesius chose me.” I sat on the couch and she followed. “Why did Moira say I couldn’t leave Elesius?”

“She did?” Annoyance flashed in my mother’s eyes.

“Yes.”

“That’s ridiculous. Of course you can leave.”

Hmm. Something wasn’t right. I could feel it. My mother was too… off. And then there was Moira’s desperation, along with the sick feeling that pervaded Elesius.

“Technically I can leave,” I said. “But Moira really didn’t want me to.”

“She’s just…” My mother searched for words.

Understanding dawned, clear and terrible. “The plants in this place died to give me my power. But what about the people? Will they die?”

“No.” My mother shook her head, but I could see the lie in her eyes.

“Moira was desperate for me to stay.” Dread curled in my stomach. “Elesius can’t survive without the plant-life. You can only trade for food for so long until your resources run out.”

“We’ll be fine. We can rely upon our talents.”

“What? Like war? You’d become mercenaries? Sell your sword instead of the gems in the mountains.”

“I don’t know, Nix. But the details don’t matter.” My mother gripped my hand, her gaze intense. “This is not your problem. Elesius was born for sacrifice. This is our role. Just like you have yours, we have ours.”

“To give everything to me. All the plant-life and the magic that keeps Elesius alive.”

“It’s tragic, but it doesn’t matter, Nix. You must defeat Drakon. There is no way to give the magic back to Elesius. Even if you could, you shouldn’t. You need that magic to defeat Drakon, and the world needs you to accomplish that.”

I leaned back against the couch, sickness welling inside me. “I’m going to kill Elesius.”

“Fate is going to kill Elesius,” my mother said. “We’ve had thousands of good years. If this is the end for us, it is a noble way to go.”

My throat tightened at my mother’s strength and honor. I wanted to be more like her, the brave warrior who accepted her fate and strode clear-eyed into battle, no matter the cost.

Instead, I wavered, torn between what I wanted—for my city to not die because of me—and what I needed to do—defeat Drakon.

And it didn’t even matter that I faltered, because she was right. I didn’t know how to give the power back.

“Moira seemed to think that if I lived there, the place wouldn’t die,” I said.

My mother sighed. “She may be right. You are life. Your magic could sustain the place if you were there constantly.”

I remembered the plant coming back to life under my fingertips. I’d done that. “If my presence can imbue a place with life, should I return to live out my days in Elesius? Would that do it?”

My heart broke just to think of it, tearing inside my chest. As much as I loved my parents and had enjoyed visiting Elesius, Magic’s Bend was my home now. Ancient Magic was my life’s work.

I couldn’t leave here.

My stomach turned. But I’d have to. If I survived Drakon, I’d have to leave everything I loved so that Elesius wouldn’t die.

“No.” My mother’s voice was sharp. “You won’t sacrifice your own happiness for Elesius. If you survive Drakon—” Her voice broke, but I’d already learned my mother was too forthright and too brave to not confront the truth that I really might die on this quest “—If you survive Drakon, you will live the life that you want to live. You won’t sacrifice it for Elesius.”

Tears choked my throat. “You’re the queen. You’d sacrifice your people?”

“I’m a mother first.” Her eyes turned fierce. “A selfish one. I want your happiness above all else.”

I smiled, at once both touched and horrified. “I can’t be happy if everyone in Elesius dies.”

She smiled, though it was sad. “I had a feeling that might be the case. Though you love it here, don’t you?”

“I want to stay here above almost anything else.” Just the idea of leaving my deirfiúr—who couldn’t travel past the barrier to Elesius—made my heart shrivel in my chest.

“Don’t think of it now.” My mother squeezed my hand. “Focus on the task at hand, then worry about the future.”