On the Rocks(91)

“Please not now, Abby,” she snapped. “I can’t listen to another diatribe on how much you hate modern technology. It’s not helping.”

Sheesh, fine. I decided that I’d stop talking about it, but I made a mental note to silently crusade for the return of actual handwritten love letters. Romeo and Juliet might have both ended up dead, but it wasn’t because of a misdirected email.

“Did you get caught?” I asked, almost afraid to hear the answer.

“No, but I saw something else on his computer. He left an instant chat on his Google account on his screen. He was talking to his wife.”

“Well, they’re still married, so talking isn’t all that strange,” I said, trying to find some encouraging words for her. “Especially if they’ve started divorce proceedings, they’re going to have to talk to each other.”

“It wasn’t that they were talking. It was the content of the conversation.”

“You read it?” I asked. I don’t know why this surprised me.

“Of course I read it.”

Okay, I thought to myself. Add electronic mail fraud to Grace’s list of legal violations for the day. Good thing she worked at a law firm. She was going need a hell of an attorney to get her out of this.

“And?”

“And he was telling her how much he loved her and how much he was looking forward to reconnecting during their weekend in Bar Harbor. He’s not leaving her, he’s taking her away for the weekend! Why would he come over last night and say all the things he did if he was then going away with his wife for the weekend? He told me it was over. He told me we were going to be together. He sent me lobsters!” she wailed. “It’s not even like she doesn’t know about me. We spoke on the f*cking phone!” The sight of Grace crying unnerved me. It didn’t happen often. In fact, for most of high school I wondered if she even had functional tear ducts, or if she just lived in a perpetual state of dehydration.

“I’m so confused,” I admitted, feeling stupid for being surprised again. I had hoped Johnny was finally going to live an honest life. I had given him the benefit of the doubt, and once again, he had made a fool out of my best friend. I wanted him shot.

Bobby shook his head and leaned forward in his chair. “Grace, this has to be enough. He’s lying to you and he’s lying to her. I don’t believe a word that comes out of that guy’s mouth, and I honestly can’t believe you do at this point.”

Grace was too smart to be acting like this, but love will make you do insanely stupid things, not the least among them, breaking into your boss’s office to delete damning email evidence.

“I know. This was the last straw. After everything he put me through, after how awful I’ve felt about myself dealing with this whole thing, I’m not going to do this to myself anymore. I waited for him to get back, and then I went into his office and I told him point-blank that I was tired of being an afterthought and that I’d never forgive him for making me think he was leaving his wife when he wasn’t.”

“Good for you. It was long overdue, Grace. I’m sorry to say it, but it’s true,” I said as I got up to hug her. “I had hoped things would change, but they won’t. You deserve so much better than this.”

“I know. I told him that it was over and to leave me alone. I’m tired of being strung along.” Grace was shaking so badly I thought she was going to throw up. “How did I end up here? He’s been stringing me along for two years. Two years of my life, gone.”

“Listen, I know you don’t want to hear this, but this is a good thing. You weren’t going to be able to get out of this on your own. Maybe this is what you needed to make the change. I hate to bring this up now, but do you think while you’re taking your mental health leave slash fake vacation you could poke around at other firms and see what’s out there?”

I wasn’t sure if this was the right time to throw further upheaval into the life of a notorious control freak, but sometimes it’s better to just rip the Band-Aid off. Of course, if I was wrong, she was about to have a meltdown the likes of which couldn’t be solved with every bottle of Smirnoff on the island.

“I don’t know. I don’t think anyone will be interested in even speaking to me if they find out the circumstances surrounding why I want to leave. It’s a big black mark on my résumé.”

“Your personal life shouldn’t make a difference. You’re a good lawyer. That’s what people will care about.” Theoretically, this should be true. I doubt Lara’s husband had a hard time replacing his secretary after his affair became public.

Just then Wolf walked into the house, took one look at us, and with his inborn German attention to detail, knew instantly that something was wrong. “Why’s everyone so sad? It’s such a beautiful day!”

“Grace broke up with her boyfriend,” I said.

“The lobster guy?” he asked, incredulous. “Why would you ever break up with the lobster guy?”

That was so not a normal way to describe someone’s boyfriend.

“What am I going to do?” Grace sobbed.

“Oh no, I’m so sorry, little Gracie,” Wolf said sympathetically. “Let’s go hammer ourselves! That will help,” he suggested.

“The term is ‘get hammered,’ not ‘hammer yourself,’ ” Bobby said. “Saying ‘hammering yourself’ means you’re going to beat yourself with an actual hammer.”