On the Prowl (Bad Things #2)(22)

Her head tipped back as she stared up at him. “How did we get here?”

He blinked, confused.

“I thought I’d found Mr. Right. You were tall, dark, and mysterious. I looked at you and didn’t want anyone else.”

He’d looked at her and, as far as Julian had been concerned—there had been no one else.

“But you were lying to me, the whole time. Pretending to be someone you weren’t.”

Pretending to be a human. “It wasn’t damn easy.” Especially when he’d had her in his bed. He’d wanted to let his wild side out, wanted that so badly, but he’d held back. For her.

Then he’d lost her anyway.

Because when I’m close to her, she always gets hurt. That’s what happens to anyone who is connected to me. Pain.

He wanted more for her.

Julian cleared his throat. “I’ll leave the door open, okay? I swear I will. You get back in bed and sleep for a few hours. I won’t interrogate the human without you.” Mostly because he needed her for the interrogation. A little vamp compulsion would help immensely. Of course, if she wasn’t in the mood to lend a hand, he could always do things the old fashioned way…with his claws.

I’ve hurt so many others in my life. I’m Luke’s assassin. Death is my game. Why did I ever think my life could be different? That I could be different?

She glanced back at the bed as his hand slid away from her. She turned away, and he let out a long, slow breath. Right. He had a wolf to find and skin. He had—

Rose looked back at him. Her hand lifted. “Will you stay with me?”

He shook his head. He’d misheard. Absolutely imagined those quiet words. Rose saw him as her enemy these days. No way would she want him in bed with her.

Wishful f*cking thinking.

“I just…I don’t want to be alone. When the ONS had me, I was always alone. They kept me away from everyone else. They kept me in the dark and I just…” Her chin lifted and her hand fell. “Never mind. I’m not supposed to be scared. Isn’t that what everyone keeps saying? I shouldn’t be afraid. I’m supposed to be a bad-ass. I’m evil. I’m—”

He scooped her into his arms.

Shock flashed on her face. “Julian?”

“You’re not evil. Screw what others say.” But he hated her fear. Hated it as much as her pain. “You be you, sweets. I’ve got enough evil for us both.”

A furrow appeared between her brows. He carried her toward the bed and then lowered her until she was nestled on the mattress. Then he stalked around to the other side of the bed and crawled in with her.

And she shocked him again. She rolled toward him. She touched him.

“Are you as bad as others say?”

He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. Such a small ear. “Worse.”

The furrow deepened. “I don’t…you’re not, though, with me.”

He eased closer to her. “That’s because you aren’t like the others.” The back of his hand trailed over her cheek. He liked touching her. Why resist something he enjoyed so much? Soon enough, she’d be far away. He’d never touch her again. “There’s no death order over your head so I don’t need to be bad.”

Her eyes widened.

Probably the wrong thing to say.

“How many…how many people have you killed?”

“Humans?” The memories flashed in his head. “Two.” He’d carry those screams forever. “Paranormals?” His lips twisted into a smile that he knew was grim. “Lost count.”

She searched his gaze. “You’re lying to me.”

He didn’t let his expression alter.

“I think you remember them all.”

She didn’t understand. If he remembered them all, madness would come.

“Why did you do it?”

Why did he kill? He forced a slow smile. “It’s the nature of the beast.” His panther was a ruthless killer. One driven by dark impulse and a hunger for blood.

Her lashes flickered. “Why didn’t you let me go? Why did you get Luke to change me?”

Because I didn’t want to be in a world without you. “I’m a selfish bastard.” Instead of letting her go, he’d forced her into a world that she would never fit into.

Because he hadn’t been lying to her…

She wasn’t evil. That was the problem. She just wasn’t bad enough. But he hadn’t cared when he’d made his deal. He hadn’t cared about any consequences. His gaze dropped to her mouth. Those perfect red lips. A mouth built for sin. A mouth that was in every one of his dreams.

But then, his dreams were usually about her.

His nightmares were about her dying.

Julian swallowed. “No more questions, okay?” Because there were some answers he didn’t want to give her. “Sleep.” His head dropped back against his pillow. He thought she’d move away, perhaps curl onto her side of the bed.

Rose put her hand on his chest. “If I…if I scream, just wake me up.”

What?

“The nightmares always come.”

Her lashes drifted closed.

Fucking hell. He was her nightmare, and he knew it.

He pulled the covers up over them. His eyes closed.