Novak Raven (Harper's Mountains #4)(58)

“Six hours.”

Avery turned and strode down the wall again, but all she wanted to do at that news was slide down the wall and fall to pieces. “Can we just open the door?”

“No, that’s against the rules here.”

“Please! I don’t like tight spaces and white rooms, and this room is only making everything harder for me.”

A trill of hope blasted through her when Patty reached over and opened the door, but she held her clipboard up to stop Avery from rushing it. “Can we get her something to calm her down?” Patty asked to someone in the hallway.

Shit.

“No, no, no, I’ll be good, please. I’ll be good. You can change your mind. You can tell them I don’t need it. Please, please, Patty, please!”

Patty closed the door again and crossed her legs. “Honey, I don’t know what to tell you. If you would just settle down, you could talk to your family.”

Avery opened her mouth to argue, but Patty held up her finger and gave her a warning look. “Dr. Lancaster already explained this. I know he did, but sometimes victims like you can grow an unhealthy attachment to their kidnappers. You have become susceptible to what they’ve said about your family, but I’ve met your parents, Avery. They are worried sick about you. Your mom wouldn’t stop crying, and your dad looks gutted about what you’ve been through. Your next therapy session is an important one. Listen to Dr. Lancaster. Really absorb what he tells you. Share what you have actually been through, and he can help you. Or…he can order you to stay here for longer.” Patty stood and walked out, but before she shut the door behind her, she said, “Carl is going to come in here in a few minutes and give you something to make you more comfortable. Don’t throw a fit, don’t Change, don’t make him have to call a bunch of nurses in here to hold you down. Don’t make us use straps. I’m trying to help you with actual advice. That kind of behavior will get time added to your stay here. If you want to be rewarded, you have to mind the rules.” Patty sounded like a raven.

As the door clicked closed behind the nurse, Avery let off a long, keening whimper and searched frantically through her memories for that letter that had been keeping her calm enough not to Change.

Some son-of-a-goblin had designed this room with no windows and, other than the door, there was only a bed screwed to the floor, topped with a white, sterile mattress and no covers. At least it wasn’t frigid cold in here, and that helped to anchor her in the here-and-now. This wasn’t The Box, just something way too f*cking close to it.

Eighteen more hours in this hell, and then she could go home to 1010, to Weston, to the Bloodrunners—not with the ravens pretending they cared in some waiting room of the hospital. Just thinking of them this close to Harper’s Mountains angered her all over again. They were ruining everything.

She’d been happy. Why the hell couldn’t they just let her be happy? Parents should want that. Normal parents anyway. When she had babies with Weston, she was going to love them so much. She would breathe for their happiness, like her heart beat for Weston’s. She would be a good mother for his children because he deserved that, and so did they. A sob wrenched from her throat, and she gave herself to the fantasy just to escape the stupid room.

Weston hadn’t mentioned wanting kids, but he would be a great daddy. He was so patient and funny with the kids that he took on ATV tours. He always had the best rapport with them. Maybe it was from being around Ryder all the time, who was basically a giant child, or perhaps it was natural for him to speak so well to kids. And he was so understanding with what she’d been through. She could just imagine him sitting next to her, one hand on her leg, one arm curved under their little sleeping baby. A boy. No…a girl, with rosy, plump little cheeks, who smiled in her sleep because Weston was talking to her in that rich, deep tone of his. And he would rock her back and forth, back and forth, tell her she was going to be a fearsome little raven someday, just like her momma. She liked that part a lot—Fantasy Weston thinking her strong. Avery was sitting on the edge of the mattress crying and weak, but in her imagination, Weston thought she was braver. And that made her feel braver. Avery wiped her damp cheeks and smiled at the next thought—the one of Weston holding a little, black, fluffy baby raven, newly Changed and peeping cutely from the bowl Weston made with his big hands.

If he wanted kids someday, Avery swore to herself she was going to give him the best, happiest nest she could. Even if she had no tools, or any idea how to do that because she hadn’t grown up in a normal household, she was going to ask the other women in the Bloodrunners. She’d watched Harper, Alana, and Lexi draw infinite smiles from their mates. So, f*ck her past. Avery had strong women to look up to now. She wiped her eyes again, drying her cheeks completely.

Someday, she was going to be a strong woman, too. She was going to earn her place in the Bloodrunners, and she was going to be so f*cking proud of the work she put in to get there.

“Hey!” Someone yelled right outside of her room. “How did you get in here? Don’t take that! Stop!”

The small window on Avery’s door shadowed with nurses running down the hall to the right. What the hell? She padded over to the door and stood on her tiptoes, craned her neck, and looked as far down the hallway as she could see. A flash of red hair bolted away from the nurses, and Ryder’s most psychotic laugh echoed through the thick door.