Never Let You Go(76)

“Oh, my God. No! Don’t do that.”

“Okay, but you just say the word and I’ll tell him to f*ck off.”

I love how protective he’s being, but he looked scared when my dad sat down with us. I glance at my door. I can hear the rattles of pots and pans, and smell food cooking, something with garlic and onions. “I should go. Dinner’s almost ready.”

“Skype later? We can watch TV together.”

I slide sideways on the bed so it’s like I’m lying next to him. “I really miss you.”

He shifts his body so he’s lying on his side too. “I like looking at you like this,” he says. “I wish I could touch you.” He raises his hand and touches the screen.

“I’ve been thinking about that,” I say, the distance making me feel brave, safe to say what I’m really feeling. “Like what would have happened if I hadn’t said no.…”

“I’m glad you said no. It wasn’t the right time. I want you to feel good about it and trust me. So you know this is a real thing.”

That breathless hiccup is back in my chest again. “Is this a real thing?”

“It is to me. I hope you come back to Dogwood soon. I’m having a party this weekend and I can’t believe you’re not going to be here.”

I roll over onto my stomach. “Party? What party?”

“My parents said I could have some people over, just the usual suspects.”

“Sounds like fun.”

“It would be more fun if you were here.” His phone chirps, and he picks it up, reads the text with a smile, then quickly taps out his reply. I’m surprised. He doesn’t usually check his phone when we are talking—and he never replies to anyone that fast, except me.

“Who’s that?”

He finishes sending his reply, then looks back at me “Just Taylor.”

Taylor. The pretty blond girl he used to date last year. The one he broke up with because he thought she was too flirty. She’s popular, athletic, always wears trendy clothes, and actually seems nice. I remember when they were dating. They looked like the perfect couple.

“You still talk to her?”

“Sometimes.” He shrugs. “She had a fight with her parents and wanted to know if I could go for coffee.”

“What did you say?”

“I told her I was busy.”

It doesn’t sound like he mentioned my name. Does she know I’m his girlfriend? All my happy feelings start to evaporate. “Is she coming to your party?”

“I don’t know. Maybe.” He gives me a funny look. “What’s the problem?”

“Nothing. I just don’t have time for games.” My eyes sting and my face feels all hot and I know I look upset. “Maybe you should go for coffee with Taylor. She obviously still likes you, and I have a lot going on in my life. I can’t even come to your party.” The whole conversation is spiraling out of control, but I can’t stop my runaway thoughts.

“Wait, stop. I won’t invite her, okay?”

“It’s not like that.” But it is like that, and now he probably thinks I’m some deranged jealous girl, and none of this is really important because my real life is so messed up, and now he’s angry, his face pulled into this expression I’ve never seen before. He looks older.

“This is because of your dad, right?” he says. “You’re stuck in Vancouver and you think I’m going to dump you because I don’t want to deal with it?”

I’m silent. He’s cut right through to the bone, and I don’t like how it sounds.

“I don’t care where you live,” he says. “You’re the only girl I want, and I can get through anything with you, okay? But I wish your dad would go away.”

Everything in me settles down, a quiet sort of calm spreading through my body, like how sometimes during a winter storm the wind just stops. He understands.

“It’s like he’s taken over everything, you know? He’s gone crazy.”

“Yeah. Someone needs to show him what crazy really looks like.”

I frown at him. “What does that mean?”

“Depends on what you think is crazy?” He’s smiling, but it’s a different kind of smile than I’ve seen on him before. I don’t like it. I hear footsteps coming down the hall. “My mom’s coming, I have to go. I’ll sign on later.” I end the call, then stare at the screen with my heart thudding hard in my chest. What if he goes and talks to my dad? What if they get in a fight?

My fingers hover over my keyboard. My mom is getting closer. She stops outside my door. “Dinner’s ready, Sophie.”

“Okay. I’m just finishing up my homework.” Her steps fade back down the hall. Jared’s icon still shows him online. I should call him back and make sure he stays away from my dad. My phone rings and I grab it, glancing at the call display. I don’t recognize the number. Andrew?

I press the phone against my stomach, muffling the sound for a moment while I think. I don’t know what to do. Turn my phone off? Call my mom? Talk to him?

Before I can think any more, I answer the call. “Who is this?”

“It’s Andrew. We need to talk.”

“I told you to leave me alone.” My blood is rushing so fast through my body and my head that it feels like I’m in a tunnel, everything dark and closed in and loud.