Needing Her (From Ashes #1.5)(29)

“Open your legs,” he said after a teasing bite.

I did, and almost came the second his fingers touched me.

“God, I love that you’re so ready for me.”

I couldn’t even be embarrassed about that; his fingers pressing against me and pushing into me had my mind blurring. His words were only turning me on more.

My stomach tightened, and blood rushed through my veins as I gripped at his hair to pull his face back to mine.

“Please, Connor,” I pleaded against his mouth.

“Please what?”

“Don’t make me wait any longer.”

Before the words had finished leaving my mouth, Connor was gripping the backs of my thighs and lifting me up against the wall, his cock already pressing against my entrance. I tried to move, but the way he was holding me left little room, and an agitated groan left me.

When he didn’t move, I practically whimpered, “Please.”

He smiled and nibbled softly on my bottom lip. “I just wanted to hear that word out of your mouth again.”

I cried out when he roughly pushed into me, and all I could do was hold on to his shoulders as he slammed into me over and over again. His thrusts got harder and faster, and the moans that I was trying to quiet continued to get louder as the muscles in his back and shoulders tightened under my fingertips from holding me up. A growl built up in his throat, and he bit down on my shoulder as he pushed into me a few more times, his whole body shaking as he came.

“Jesus Christ,” he breathed.

I still couldn’t speak, so I just nodded and moaned when he pulled out and set my feet gently down. His fingers went back to touch me, and suddenly his body stilled.

“Condom.”

Still in my daze, I blinked slowly and pressed down against his fingers. “What?”

“Condom, Maci, f*cking condom; I wasn’t wearing one.”

“Ok—”

“No, I’ve never not worn one.”

“Okay, Connor. It’s fine.”

He shook his head and backed away from me. “Maci, I’m so damn sorry.”

“It’s all righ—”

“It’s not,” he cut me off. “I don’t . . . f*ck . . . I don’t do this! I even had them in my jeans. I’m sorry.”

Pushing him back, I bent down to grab my clothes and had taken a few steps toward my bathroom before he grabbed my arm to stop me. “I swear to God, Connor, if you apologize one more goddamn time I will punch you in the face.”

“Maci, I just don’t—”

“You don’t do that. I get it. I’ve never done it without a condom either, but I’ve also never had that,” I gritted out, pointing at the wall, “and now all you’re doing is pissing me off. I’m on the pill . . . and looking at your face, that still doesn’t mean shit to you.”

With a huff, I turned and walked into my bathroom to start the shower. I angrily yanked my bra off, and put my hair up in a high bun before stepping under the hot stream of water. Almost immediately after, Connor was pushing back the curtain and stepping in behind me.

“You have your own shower right next—”

He turned me around, and grabbed the back of my head to bring me closer to him and kiss me thoroughly.

I pushed against his now-wet chest, but he didn’t go far. “No, you don’t get to pull that shit, and then just come in here and act like you didn’t just completely f*ck everything up.”

“Just listen to me. I’m sorry for reacting like that. I’ve never had sex without a condom on, and I hadn’t even known until I looked down. Yes, it scared the living hell out of me when I realized that I hadn’t worn one, but I also couldn’t get over the fact that for the first time, that hadn’t been my first thought, and main thought during. But, Maci, I told you that you’re not those other girls I’ve been with. It’s different with you, and I’m not going to lie to you, part of me is terrified by that. But the rest hated watching yo

u walk away from me just then, and hated knowing I’d pissed you off after that.”

I wanted to punch him. I also kind of felt like I was about to cry, and wanted to throw my arms around him. I hated that he could mess with my emotions like this, but I loved the way I felt when he touched me, looked at me . . . talked to me. I was still scared that this was all just going to be gone.

He’d said he’d been thinking of me for a week the other night . . . I’d been craving him for years, and finally had him. I was in too deep way too fast; I knew I was beyond what he could be feeling for me. So he’d freaked over not wearing a condom, understandable. It was the fact that he’d still looked at me with such a horrified expression even after he’d known I was protecting myself that had killed me. But I couldn’t let that be a reason for me to push him away, and gaging from our conversation the other morning, he probably wouldn’t let me anyway.

“Maci, please say something.”

I focused on his bright blue eyes, and came up empty on how to respond to all he’d said; so, instead, I slowly closed the distance between us and brought his face down to mine.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered and kissed me firmly.

“Stop apologizing.”

Wrapping my arms around his neck, I deepened the kiss and leaned my body into him when his hands slid down my waist to grip my hips. The kiss escalated quickly, and soon our hands were searching, and I couldn’t get enough of him.