Maybe This Time (Maybe #1)(7)
“You didn’t wanna see me?” he asks, looking worried.
“Just wanted to settle in,” I say, blushing. Trust my dad to get straight to the point.
“I didn’t even see you last year for your birthday, Summer, it’s been two years since I’ve seen my own daughter,” he says, brows furrowing.
I shrug, because I have no idea what he expects me to say to that.
“How’s Xander treating you?” he asks, thankfully changing the subject.
“He’s wonderful,” I say, a smile forming on my lips. My brother makes me feel welcome here, and I feel like I’ve known him my whole life.
“He loves you.” I nod, giving him a forced smile. He tells me Xander loves me, but not him. Again, I have no idea what to say. He exhales, a look of regret and sadness flashing in his eyes.
“If you ever need anything, you come to me, okay?” he says, his dark brown eyes staring into mine.
I nod and force a smile. He scowls, and stares at me like he wants to say something else, but doesn’t. He gives me a pained smile, and then leaves.
As soon as the door closes, I sag onto the bed, relieved. I didn’t have a father my whole life, and I don’t intend on having one now. Not that I don’t love him, because I do. But it hurts, even after all these years.
Truth be told, I’m scared to let him in. He wasn’t there for me, no matter how much I wished for it. I didn’t want any money or gifts from him, I just wanted him. I wanted him to be there for my graduation, for my sports carnivals and dance recitals. I used to imagine him being there in the audience one day, watching me, but it never happened. He let me down each time, because he never came. That was the hardest, starting to believe what my mother told me, that it was true - maybe he didn’t want me.
After everything, it’s just a little unnerving being in his presence. I still feel like that little girl who wants his attention. If Xander wasn’t here, I wouldn’t have come at all.
I wouldn’t have felt that I was welcome.
Chapter Three
The next day, I open the door, surprised to see Reid standing there. And that he actually knocked for once.
“You knocked,” I say, stepping aside for him to enter.
“Yeah, well, it was locked for once.” He grins at me. Oh, right.
I walk in front of him to the kitchen. “Xander’s not here.”
“Where did he go?” he asks, opening the fridge and helping himself to a bottle of water.
“Gym.”
“Right, I’m heading there now so I’ll catch up with him then,” he says, his eyebrows scrunching together.
“Are you okay?” I ask.
“Yeah. How are you settling in?” he asks, looking like he genuinely wants to know.
“Great, actually. Feels like I’ve known Xander my entire life.” I smile fondly, thinking about my brother.
“Yeah, he can’t stop talking about you,” Reid says, running his finger absently along his scarred jaw line. “Do you maybe want to…” he trails off, staring at me.
“What?” I ask warily, when his gaze doesn’t budge.
He clears his throat. “You look… beautiful today.”
Wait, did he just say that? “Umm. Thank you,” I reply, looking down at my frayed denim shorts and white singlet top. I glance up to see his eyes on my thighs.
“Reid,” I say, smiling when he trails his gaze from my thighs to my face, his perusal bold. “Not one for subtlety, are you?”
He leans down onto the kitchen bench, his lip twitching. “I can’t help it. It’s been so long since I’ve seen something I wanted this bad.”
“Umm,” I mumble, the look on his face leaving me incoherent. I don’t think any man has ever looked at me like that. Like he’s dying of thirst and I’m the iced water. I shift on my feet under his scrutiny.
“You’re not so bad yourself,” I finally reply, leaning on the bench, so our elbows are almost touching.
He tilts his head, regarding me. “I told you… trouble.”
I roll my eyes. “How so?”
“I’m standing here right now, watching you. Pretended I came here to see Xander, when I knew he was already gone, just so I could get a few minutes alone with you. I can’t seem to stop thinking about you. Trouble.”
My eyes widen in surprise. “You came here to see me?”
“I did, and now I can see it was a mistake. You’re not for me, Summer, I shouldn’t have come here,” he says, pulling back to stand straight. His eyes are now shuttered, his expression closed off.
Having no idea what to say to that, I stay quiet.
“I gotta head to the gym,” he says, turning his back on me and leaving.
*****
My first week living with Xander passes quickly. He goes to work, or goes to the gym with the guys. Most days they come here to hang out, and I cook us all dinner. They act like they haven’t had a home cooked meal in years, and it feels good to be making myself useful in the house.
Reid doesn’t come over as much as Dash and Ryan, and when he does, he's his usual charming self. We never mention him coming to see me. Sometimes I catch him staring at me when he thinks I’m not looking, but then his trademark scowl takes over, and then I think I imagined the moment we had when he came over altogether.