Maybe This Time (Maybe #1)(63)

A glance at my phone shows eighteen missed called from Reid. I start to worry, thinking something might be wrong, but there are no calls from anyone else, just a message from Ryan saying to be safe. Dad and Xander rang me before, and I told them I was visiting a friend and will be back home tomorrow. They both sounded worried, so I assume they heard the gossip already.

My last thought is of Reid before I fall asleep.





*****


Yellow sunflowers.

My mother’s favourite flower. I place down a solitary sunflower on my mother’s gravestone. I miss my mum every day, but it hurts that she kept me away from dad and Xander all this time. I think it was selfish of her, and even a little vindictive. She gave me an amazing childhood, though, so I guess I can’t really complain. Some people aren’t that lucky, to have a mother and father who both love and want them.

My mum died from a heart attack. I still remember the pain of losing her, like it was yesterday. There’s no point in looking back, thinking about the ‘what ifs’. I decide to think of the fond memories I have with mum, and there really are a lot of them.

“Love you, mum,” I say softly, before turning and walking to my car. I slump down into the driver’s seat, knowing that it’s time to head home.





Chapter Twenty Five


Exhausted, I walk slowly to the front door. I have a moment of déjà-vu when Reid opens the door before I can even pull my key out.

“What the f*ck are you doing here?” I say, too tired to be dealing with him right now. He says nothing, but moves aside so I can enter. He’s shaved the almost beard thing he had going on, but he still looks tired like he hasn’t slept.

I walk past him without a word, straight into my room. I slam the door behind me, the force rattling it on its hinges. I quickly lock it, before he can try and enter, and then pull off my denim jacket and fling it onto the ground, and hop straight into my bed. A soft knock alerts me of his presence at my door.

“Summer, can we talk, please?” he begs. His voice contains something I haven’t heard in it before, and I frown wondering what it might be. Remorse? Guilt? No, it’s fear.

“I’m tired, Reid, I just want to sleep. I’m sure your new girlfriend would love to see you, though,” I call out, making a grunting noise at my own comment. I hear a tap against the door, and then a sliding noise. I wait ten minutes, and I know he’s still there, so I can’t even sleep.

“Reid, what are you doing?” I ask.

“I’m gonna sit here and wait for you to talk to me,” he says. Stubborn man.

“Go home, Reid.”

“No.”

“I don’t want you,” I say, frustrated.

“Yeah, well, I want you enough for the both of us,” he replies calmly.

“I hate you,” I tell him.

“No, you don’t, you only wish you did because I’m an *.” He's an *, alright.

“If you love me, you'll just leave me alone.”

Silence. Then, “That’s bullshit. I do love you, more than anything, and that’s why I’m not gonna give up.”

“If this is how you love someone, by leaving them and cheating on them, then I want no part of your love,” I yell, my voice cracking.

I hear him curse. “Please open the door,” he rasps. I groan and get up, unlocking the door. Seeing him sitting down on the floor doesn’t make me feel good at all.

“Get up, Reid.” I say before turning and heading back to bed. He stands up and comes into my room, closing the door behind him. I watch as he sits down on the bed, and his hand reaches up to touch my face.

“I was worried about you,” he says quietly.

“Why? It’s not like I left for a month with no word,” I snap at him.

He breaks eye contact, looking down at his feet. “I was hurting.”

“Yeah, well, so was I.”

“I reacted badly, beauty, I’m f*cking sorry, okay,” he says, turning his head back to look at me. He looks sorry, his eyes are sincere, but does it really matter?

“You came to a bar, where you know I work, and had a woman on your lap, making out with her with roaming hands. If I did that to a guy in front of you, how would you feel?” I ask.

His jaw clenches and his eyes harden. “I would seriously hurt whoever the bastard was.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t do shit like that to you, Reid.”

“I was drunk, I’d just seen Mia and she told me things…” he trails off. I can only imagine what Mia had told him. “My head was messed up.”

“And I get that. But things don’t always go how we want them, are you gonna react like this every time a problem arouses?”

“Baby, finding out my baby brother was sleeping with my ex-girlfriend and River is his, not mine, isn’t just a problem. It’s more than that,” he growls, letting his emotions take over.

“You’re right,” I admit. “I guess I’m just scared now.”

“I’ll do everything I can to prove to you I’m right for you. No one will ever love you like I do, baby, because it’s just not possible. I wanted to do some huge romantic gesture for you, to say sorry, but I’m really not a candles and rose petals kind of guy,” he cringes as he says the last few words. “But you know that about me, and you love me anyway. So I was hoping,” he swallows heavily. “I was hoping, you would give me another chance. I won’t lose you, Summer. I can’t.”