Love and Let Die (Masters and Mercenaries #5)(86)

“Will they really take you?” Chelsea whispered.

“If Ian lets them, yes.” She didn’t care anymore. If they were going to take her, then it wouldn’t matter that she worried about it.

This wasn’t the submission she’d dreamed about when she’d planned her reunion with Ian, but it seemed that submitting to fate was the only thing left to do.

Phoebe leaned forward. “Did you really marry him?”

Charlie looked up, taking in the woman who seemed so scared of her husband. “Uhm, yes. I married him in England.”

“He didn’t like force you or anything, right?”

If only she could tell herself that, but no, everything that had happened between them was consensual. Everything except him throwing her out. “No. I loved him.”

Phoebe shook her head. “I’m sorry. I don’t understand. He’s just so scary.”

Charlie looked back at the conference room. He didn’t look scary. He looked tired and sad. He looked like she felt. She put a hand on the window, feeling his pull.

He turned away.

If Phoebe was going to work here, she needed to learn how to deal with her boss. “Just stand up to him. He’s all bark and no bite around women. Don’t get me wrong, if you truly cross him, you’ll pay for it, but you can’t let him push you around.”

Phoebe went a little white. “Oh, I can barely talk around the man. I don’t think I’ll be standing up to him anytime soon.”

“He’s just a man,” Chelsea said, her tone exasperated. “I don’t understand why every woman around is either afraid of him or trying to sleep with him.”

“You can be both,” Phoebe said, her eyes going to the conference room.

Charlie slapped a hand on Phoebe’s desk, getting the girl’s attention back where it should be. “If you try to sleep with him, then you won’t need to be afraid of Ian. You should be afraid of me.”

Phoebe’s mouth dropped open. “I am. I really am right now. I’m going to go get some coffee. I’ll be back.”

She nearly ran out of the room.

“Way to scare the mouse, sis.”

She sat in silence. She wasn’t sure what she wanted to say to Chelsea. She’d failed her like she’d failed Ian.

“Can you not even look at me now?”

Charlie shook her head. Maybe Ian wasn’t the only one who needed time. “I’m just sorry, Chelsea.”

“For what?” Her sister got to her knees, obviously unwilling to accept the situation.

“For whatever I did wrong.”

Chelsea reached for her hand. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I did. I got in really deep, Charlie. I can’t explain it except to say it’s an obsession. But it’s one that’s protected us up until now.”

“I should have forced you to go to school. I should have paid more attention to you. I was obsessed with Ian. I should have put it aside and dealt with you.”

Chelsea squeezed her hand. “Charlotte, we can still make this right. We can get away from here. I’m not going to let them take you. I never once meant to let you take the fall for me. I love you. You’re my only family. You’re the only person I have in the whole world. I’m certainly not going to lose you.”

Her sister was still in way too deep. “Chelsea, listen to yourself. You’ve been playing god for way too long. You won’t be able to stop it. If those men take me there will be absolutely nothing you can do about it. I’ll be gone and you won’t see me again and I don’t even know if you can function in the real world.”

“What are you talking about?” Chelsea asked, sitting back on her heels and dropping her hand.

“You’ve set up your own little kingdom. Your own world and you rule it, and you don’t consider what it means to anyone else.”

“No one else matters.”

“Everyone matters. Didn’t you learn anything?”

A stubborn mask fell over Chelsea’s face. “Yes, I learned that my legs break when someone takes a baseball bat to them. I learned that you either have power or you’re meaningless.”

“You have compassion or you’re soulless, Chelsea. Momma taught us that.”

“Momma let herself be used by a monster. She married him. She had kids by him.”

She wished her sister could really remember. “No, she was brave. She ran. She hid.”

“Not well enough, so she kind of lost that battle. You know I always thought you were the strong one, but I’ve had to be for the last several years. You pretend to be the leader but all your decisions are made between your legs. You forgot about me, so I’ve had to make sure we were safe.”

Charlie turned in her chair, unable to look at Chelsea a moment longer. “What did you expect me to do? Live with you the rest of my life? Don’t you want something more? Don’t you want someone to love?”

A bitter laugh escaped her sister’s lips. “Who’s going to love me? You might have a few scars, but you can still walk properly. You don’t ache every single day. No one’s going to love me, Charlotte. I’m not that girl.” She finally got up and sat back down in her chair, taking a long breath. “I don’t think Ian’s going to love you either. I’m not trying to be a bitch. I’m realistic. He’s not a forgiving man. He wants a sub, not a wife. He wants someone who will spend her whole life cooking his dinner and worshiping at his feet.”