Love Tap(72)

“Yeah, you like that?” He pumps into me hard, my tits bouncing. “You want to know why you couldn’t move on and be with anyone else? Because nobody can fill your dark desires like I can.” His voice is laced with need, with anger, as he continues to f*ck me. I don’t answer him. I couldn’t if I wanted to. I didn’t think I wanted this; that I was too unfocused to feel anything, but I was wrong. This is just what I needed. Sex. Hard, hot, sex.

He releases my breast, and cups me right above my collarbone. My eyes pop open in panic finding hooded eyes looking right at me as Camden hovers over me.

“Trust me?”

I swallow, my heart racing. I do trust Camden, I always have, but we’ve never taken it this far in the bedroom before. Him revealing his darkest secrets to me, I bet he’s worried I don’t trust him. He’s testing me.

One thing he should know about me, is I don’t back down so easily.

“I trust you.”

“Tap my shoulder if it becomes too much,” he tells me rather than asks, and I’m not going to lie, a little bundle of nerves release themselves in my stomach.

Leaning down he kisses me hard, his tongue filling my mouth and taking the fear with it.

His hand on my neck he pulls his mouth from mine, and thrusts his hips into me hard.

“No more childhood crushes and whispering sweet nothings, Tate. You left and I became a broken monster who circles a gym daily… waiting for the chance to be released. A beast that is in between your legs, and will be damned if you leave me again.” The grip on my neck tightens, not to the point I can’t breathe, but enough that my body tingles with awareness. Fear driving my want for more, I arch my neck into his hold. His perfect lips form into a smirk as he tightens his grip a little more. The rush of excitement settles between my legs, as Camden takes control of my body. “We’re not so different though. When you let me in between your legs I discovered Tatum Davis was a saint looking to get f*cked hard.”

My chest burns, my head lightens, and warmth blazes through me as I come harder than I ever have. A guttural roar vibrates his chest as he comes. His body stiffens and he shoves his face into the crook of my neck. His hand releasing my neck and scratching down my arms. A trail of red streaks left behind their wake, as he falls from his euphoric high.

We lay there, him on me, and me panting underneath for what seems like forever. At some point my arm reached around, and I began slowly tracing circles along his back in a sense of comfort. A lot has happened in the four years I have been gone. He’s right, he’s not the guy I left behind. He’s a man, a broken one at that. Sadly, I think I like this version of Camden better.

“Well, now you know,” he whispers.

Sliding my hand into his hair, I pull on it just enough to make him face me.

“I don’t love you any less, if anything… I love you more.”

His brows pinch together in confusion.

“Why would you want to be with someone like me? I have urges to kill people, I’m not… I’m not normal.”

“I’m more afraid of those who claim to be normal. I love you and your madness Camden, conformity is an illusion, you are real.”

He smashes his lips to mine. His mouth working mine like magic, and instantly I know I have nothing to fear with Camden. He may be broken, but I am the adhesive to keeping him together. I can feel it in the way he kisses me, the way he looks at me, the way his heart beats against my chest when he f*cks me. I know it, because he’s the glue to my broken reality too.

Without each other, we’re destined to fail.

It’s fate’s way of keeping us together.

I palm his face, making him look me in the eye.

“You know what I think your problem is? You’re stuck in the past and can’t move forward, Camden. You have to forgive yourself, grieve, and move on.”

He shakes his head, pulling my hand from his.

“I can’t, hell I don’t even know where to begin if I wanted to.” His voice is raw, his eyes pained as they find mine.

“You do, you’re just afraid, Camden.” His eyes flash in knowing. The ring is the only place Camden can let his ghost free.

He breaks eye contact, and lays his head on my chest.

“I can’t, it’s not safe.”

My brows raise, my heart beating painfully for him. I wish I could take all his pain away, and show him the way to forgiveness.

Sadly, that’s a road he’ll have to find himself.





Chapter Twenty-Four


Camden



Tate sits on a wooden bench, her foot tapping the floor as she wrings her hands anxiously. Pre-fight jitters. They’re the worst, and will call your fight before you even step foot in the ring.

Reba pulls and tugs on Tate’s blonde hair, braiding it into cornrows along her scalp. It’s protocol to have your hair tightly braided to keep from injury inside the ring. Tate winces, and scratches at her head as Reba continues to jostle her head around. I remember how much those damn things itched and hurt when my hair was considered a hazard. I don’t miss them.

Pulling the door to her locker open I open a gym bag I packed, and pull out an old school Walkman.

Kneeling in front of her, I place an earbud in her left ear and she flinches aggressively, like she didn’t even notice I was in the room.