Love Starts with Elle(66)

“And no one stops them?”

“Like who? If the pastor can’t . . . I had two-thirds of the church believing these leaders—four couples in all—rode a chariot into God’s throne room every night and returned with unspeakable oracles. The remaining third knew better but were either intimidated, naturally, or had been burned once and weren’t going to go there again.”

“Jeremiah, that’s horrible.”

“And I witnessed them in action.” Jeremiah got up from the table. “Can we walk?”

Elle kicked off her shoes and joined him where sand met pine needles. His feet slipped in the sand as they walked into the head wind.

Jesus, what do I say to him?

After a long silence, he said, “Now I understand why the church went through senior pastors like melting ice on a hot August afternoon.”

“What about your friends? The ones who recommended you?”

“They are a part of it.” Jeremiah stopped as if his next step required too much energy. His gaze was lost out over the sea. “Maurice figured I’d go for the television thing and let him run everything else. The sad thing is, Elle, they don’t understand what they are doing. They love Jesus, but are blinded by their own ambition.”

“It’s like a movie script; I can’t believe it.” Elle stood with him, arms crossed, sea salt coating her skin. “But I know you wouldn’t be here otherwise.” She looked up at him. “Are you okay?”

“Wrestling with God, bitter, but working through it. Why did it appear to be a great opportunity if it was all going to fall apart?” He touched her shoulder. “I’m glad you weren’t there.”

“I’ve asked myself a similar question all summer. If we weren’t right for each other, why didn’t God intervene sooner?”

But how else would I have rented the cottage and met Heath?

“And what did you conclude?” Hand in his pockets, he started walking again. Sadness shadowed his high cheekbones.

Elle stared at the back of his shirt, pressed against him by the wind, and filtered his question through her last thought . . . “How else would I have met Heath?” Her breath caught for a moment.

Jeremiah stopped in the sand, twisting sideways to look at her. “Elle? Did I lose you? Must have been some conclusion.”

She flashed a smile, moving toward him. “Sorry, trapped by a random thought. No big conclusion, Jer. It’s just I discovered that sometimes falling apart is the will of God, the opportunity to draw near, to grow in love.”

He pinched his brow into a V. “Not sure I signed up for that version of Christianity.”

“Me neither, but what if God meant for your Dallas church plan to fall apart? For my wedding and gallery aspirations to come up short? What if failing is really succeeding?”

“Unto what gain?” His tone mocked a little.

“Godly gain. He who loses his life for Christ will gain it.”

Jeremiah regarded her, then shook his head. “I gave up football to answer the call. You sold your gallery, rented the cottage to follow Him with me.”

“Maybe that was only the first part of the journey.”

“I’m taking a job at FSU. Assistant athletic director. One of my old coaches is there. He opened the door.”

“You’re leaving the ministry?”

“Seems it left me.” Jeremiah bent down midstride, picking up a shell, and flung it at the water. “Three years of divinity training, shot.”

Elle hurried to walk in front of him, to see his face. “One bad experience and you quit? Jeremiah, where’s the heart of a star athlete, the one who breaks tackles striding for the goal?”

“Quoting my own sermon to me won’t change my mind.”

Elle observed as he flung another shell. But they were too light for the breeze and dropped to the beach without flying.

“You accepted already?”

“Ministry either breaks a man or makes him, and I’m getting out before I’m broken.”

“Maybe that’s the point, Jeremiah. Brokenness.”

Jeremiah lifted his hand toward her hair as it blew across her cheeks, but dropped it before touching her. “I can be broken in Tallahassee as much as any place.”

“You know what I loved about you when I met you?”

“My dashing good looks?” He smiled, half teasing, half hunting.

“I loved your confidence. You knew your calling. You were strong where I was weak.” The wind picked up, wrapping Elle’s skirt around her knees.

“Just because I’m changing my career doesn’t change who I am, Elle. I can be there for you, help you find what you’re looking for.”

“I’m praying my way there, Jer, and I like the journey, bumps and all.”

The dipping sun unrolled an orange and red banner across the blue expanse, and in this place of beauty, Elle grieved for Jeremiah. Not only did the Dallas experience wreck his ministry, but it seemed to have looted his personal relationship with the one called Christ.

Jeremiah swept her to him with a single-arm embrace. “Elle, I love you and I need you. The night we broke up, you asked me to quit the church instead of you, and I refused. I made the wrong choice. But not once did I doubt proposing. You were the one for me from the first moment I saw you. Elle, you’re the one for me now.” He bent toward her, hesitating, then carefully dusted her lips with his. “Marry me.”