Lincoln in the Bardo(40)



lawrence t. decroix

They were like my work: the greatest in the world at that time. Wouldn’t you say? Can we agree upon that point?

professor edmund bloomer

I believe we can.

I believe we have.

On many prior occasions.

lawrence t. decroix

I hope that soon you will again remind me of how much you thought of my work. I find it touching that you admire me so. And perhaps, someday soon, I will again remark upon how fine your pickles were, if that would please you. I would be happy to do so. You are worth it. You who are so loyal, and admire me so much.

professor edmund bloomer

Strange, isn’t it? To have dedicated one’s life to a certain venture, neglecting other aspects of one’s life, only to have that venture, in the end, amount to nothing at all, the products of one’s labors utterly forgotten?

lawrence t. decroix

Fortunately, that does not pertain to us.

As we have (once again) reminded ourselves: our considerable accomplishments live on!

professor edmund bloomer

The Barons now charged the doorway, bursting between the two men, briefly severing their conjoinment.

hans vollman

Ouch.

professor edmund bloomer

Say, that stings!

lawrence t. decroix

Upon the separation, and again upon the rejoining!

professor edmund bloomer

Sir.

Rev.

eddie baron

We didn’t get to finish.

betsy baron

You rushed us off.

Before.

eddie baron

So.

betsy baron

As I was saying: F—– them! Those f—–ing ingrate snakes have no G——ed right to blame us for a f—–ing thing until they walk a f—–ing mile in our G——ed shoes and neither f—–ing one of the little s—–heads has walked even a s—–ing half-mile in our f—–ing shoes.

eddie baron

Maybe we had too many parties. Maybe that’s why they never come see us.

betsy baron

Them kids was born a shrunken old lady and a shrunken old man who didn’t know the first G——n thing about how to f—–ing enjoy! You know another word for “party”? Celebration. You know another word for “celebrate”? Have f—–ing fun. Make f—–ing merry. So we drank a little f—–ing ale! Had some G——n wine!

eddie baron

Touch of opium now and— betsy baron

We might have sampled that f—–ing substance, so as not to offend—who was it? That brought that? Who started that whole— eddie baron

Benjamin.

betsy baron

Ah, Benjamin, Benjy! Remember that f—–ing mustache? Didn’t we hold him down that once, at McMurray’s, shave him bald?

eddie baron

I once made the beast with Benjy.

betsy baron

Ah, who didn’t? Ha ha! No: although I personally never made the f—–ing beast with Benjy, as far as I remember, still, there were times when, among the general, ah, hilarity, it got a little f—–ing unclear just who was making the G——ed beast with— eddie baron

Then, from among that multitude, came a tremendous shout— the reverend everly thomas

An unhappy murmur arose— roger bevins iii

And many people began shouting, saying, no, no, it was not appropriate, demanding that the “darkies”— the reverend everly thomas

“Black beasts”— hans vollman

“Damnable savages”— roger bevins iii

Return at once, from whence they had come.

the reverend everly thomas

It was a momentous occasion and they must not spoil it.

hans vollman

Let them have their chance, someone cried from the throng. In this place, we are all the same.

Speak for yourself, someone else shouted.

And we heard the sound of blows.

the reverend everly thomas

But several men and women of the sable hue, having boldly followed the Barons over from the mass grave on the other side of the fence— roger bevins iii

Were not to be dissuaded.

hans vollman

And would, it seemed, have their say.

the reverend everly thomas





LXVI.

I did always try, in all my aspects, to hew to elevation; to dispense therewith, into myself, those higher virtues of which, rendered without, one verily may sag, and, dwelling there in one’s misfortune, what avails.

elson farwell

What the f—– is he saying?

eddie baron

Say it more simple, Elson. So they can f—–ing follow you.

betsy baron

Born to an unlucky fate, perforce, what attraction if, saddling sad fate unremorsed, I only succumbed, but, rather, was, instead, always happy to have loaded upon me any fulsome burdens, never dismaying those febrile opportunities to better oneself, such as books (which I many minutes stole from, abjectly accruing ample notes, on pages gleaned from Mr. East’s discard), to wit: find out and spelunk what was best and most beaming in my soul, such as: clean linens; gentle motions (as in the dance); shimmering forks held high in mid-conversation, while emitting a jolly whinnying laugh.

elson farwell

The sweetest f—–er, but talks so G——ed complicated.

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