Lies (Gone #3)(40)

Jill sang the first lines of a song that Orsay didn’t recognize.

Hushaby, don’t you cry,

go to sleep little baby…



The world closed in around Orsay like a soft, warm blanket. Her own mother, her real mother, had never been the kind for singing lullabies. But in her mind it was a different mother, the mother she’d wished she had.

When you awake, you shall have

all the pretty little ponies…



And now Orsay could see, in her mind’s eye, the blacks and the bays, the dapples and grays, all dancing through her imagination. And with them a life she had never had, a world she’d never known, a mother who would sing…

Hushaby…



Jill fell silent. Orsay blinked, a sleepwalker waking. She saw her followers, the children, all so close together now, they seemed almost to meld into one. They had shuffled ever closer to Jill and now pressed against the rock.

But their eyes were not on Jill, or even on Orsay. They were on that angel-decorated sunset and their own mother’s faces.

“Now it’s time,” Nerezza said to Orsay.

“Okay,” Orsay said. “Yes.”

She pressed her hand against the barrier. The electric jolt burned her fingertips. The pain was still stunning, even after so many times. She had to fight the compelling urge to pull back.

But she pressed her hand against the barrier, and the pain fired every nerve in her hand, traveled up her arm, searing, burning.

Orsay closed her eyes.

“It’s…is there…is Mary here?”

A voice gasped.

Orsay opened her tear-filled eyes and saw Mary Terrafino toward the back. Poor Mary, so burdened.

Mary, so terribly thin now. Starvation made so much worse by anorexia.

“Do you mean me?” Mary asked.

Orsay closed her eyes. “Your mother…I see her dreams of you, Mary.” Orsay felt the images wash over her, comforting, disturbing, blessedly distracting from the pain.

“Mary six years old…Your mother misses you…. She dreams of when you were little and you were so upset when your little brother got a toy for Christmas that you wanted.”

“The skateboard,” Mary whispered.

“Your mother dreams that you will come to her soon,” Orsay said. “It’s your birthday again, so soon, Mary. So grown up now.

“Your mother says that you have done enough, Mary. Others will take over your work.”

“I can’t…,” Mary said. She sounded stricken. “I can’t leave those kids alone.”

“Your birthday falls on Mother’s Day, Mother Mary,” Orsay whispered, finding her own words strange.

“Yes,” Mary admitted. “How did you—”

“On that day, Mother Mary, you will free your children so that you can be Mary the child again,” Orsay said.

“I can’t leave them behind—”

“You won’t, Mary. As the sun sets, you will lead them with you to freedom,” Orsay whispered. “As the sun sets in a red sky…”



Sanjit had spent the evening watching a movie starring his adoptive father. Fly Boy Too. He’d seen it before. They’d all seen every single one of Todd Chance’s movies. And most of Jennifer Brattle’s movies. Just not the ones with nudity.

But Fly Boy Too was of particular interest for a twelve-second clip that showed an actor—or maybe it was an actual pilot, who could tell—flying a helicopter. In this case he was flying a helicopter while trying to machine-gun John Gage—played by Todd Chance—while Gage leaped from car to car of a speeding freight train.

Sanjit had replayed that same twelve-second clip a hundred times, till his brain was swimming and his eyes were glazed over.

Now, with all the others in bed, Sanjit took the late, late shift with Bowie. Or maybe it was the early, early shift.

He sat down in the deep armchair by Bowie’s bed.

There was a goosenecked floor lamp that arched over his shoulder and shone a small circle of light on the book he opened. It was a war novel. About Vietnam, which was a country next to Thailand, where he’d been born. Evidently there had been a war there a long time ago, and Americans had been in that war. That wasn’t what interested him. What interested him was that they used a lot of helicopters and this particular novel focused on a soldier who flew a helicopter.

It wasn’t much, but it was all he had. The author must have done some research, at least. His descriptions sounded good. Sounded like they weren’t just made up.

This was not the way to learn how to fly a helicopter.

Bowie flopped his head angrily to one side, as if he was having a bad dream. Sanjit was close enough to put his hand on Bowie’s forehead. The skin was hot and damp.

He was a good-looking kid, Bowie was, with watery blue eyes and goofy teeth. So pale that sometimes he looked like one of the white marble gods Sanjit had seen in his long-lost childhood.

Those were cool to the touch. Bowie, not.

Leukemia. No, surely not. But it wasn’t a cold or flu, either. This had gone on way too long for it to be the flu. Plus, no one else had gotten sick. So it probably wasn’t that kind of thing. A catching thing.

Sanjit really did not want to have to see this little boy die. He had seen people die. An old beggar man with no legs. A woman who had died in a Bangkok alleyway after having a baby. A man who’d been stabbed by a pimp.