Lethal Temptations (Tempted #5)(5)

I stared back at Jimmy.

I couldn’t deny his demands, Jack was depending on me to bring this shit home, to end this motherf*cker—if I bitched out now then we’d never get him or the G-Man.

What’s one more time?

Just one more taste.

I pushed back my chair and left him to stare after me as I walked into the Satan’s Knights chapel, straight toward the safe in the wall and punched in the code.

After, we decided we would pose as Jimmy’s supplier, I needed to get my hands on the drugs so I went up to north to the Corrupt Bastards MC and ironed out a deal to get the heroin from them. The plan was to give Jimmy a taste of their product, let him think it was ours, and get him hooked on the profit. Once he was polluting the streets with the smack we would cut him off, tell him he needed to buy an obscene about if he wanted to keep the connection. Then when we delivered we would set him up with the cops. Jimmy would get arrested with all the drugs on him and with all Vic’s connections, eventually the bastard would wind up in the same prison as his former boss. Vic was itching to kill this motherf*cker.

I grabbed the leather pouch and shut the safe before walking back out to find Jimmy exactly where I left him. I threw the pouch on the table before sitting back down and stared back at him.

“Fine, let’s get this over with,” I seethed.

Just one more taste.

“Wonderful” Jimmy exclaimed, pulling out his phone and quickly making a call, instructing whoever it was to come inside. Jimmy ended the call and reached for the pouch, unzipping it and pulled out a vile of heroin. Carmine walked into the clubhouse, taking a seat between us and we both watched as Jimmy filled one needle and then another.

Carmine rolled up his sleeve, exposing the track marks on his arm, searching for a vein that wasn’t collapsed from all the use. I watched him stab the needle into his flesh and close his eyes as he drained the syringe into his bloodstream.

Jimmy extended the second needle full of smack toward me and my eyes met his.

“Whenever you’re ready Blackie,” he crooned.

I reached for the band, tying it tightly around my bicep and turned over my forearm, slapping at it until a solid vein bulged beneath my skin. I took the syringe from him, forcing my eyes to stay open, knowing if I closed them now all I’d see was Christine.

I’m sorry.

So, very f*cking sorry.

The needle pricked my skin and my thumb pressed down on the top as the poison began to fill me. “There you go,” Jimmy taunted. “Just a little more,” he coaxed as I emptied the syringe into my vein. “All done.”

Carmine pulled the needle from his arm, dropping it onto the floor and it rolled across the laminate flooring. I left the needle in my arm as I stared back at Jimmy, struggling to fight against the shit swimming in my bloodstream.

“All good,” Carmine drawled, already feeling the effects of the drugs.

“I’ll be in touch,” Jimmy said, satisfied as he pushed his chair back and rose to his feet. He snapped his fingers, muttered something under his breath as he pulled Carmine to his feet and strutted out of the clubhouse. I heard the door close behind them, signaling I was alone and then I allowed my eyes to close and saw her face. A moan escaped the back of my throat as I vividly recalled the way I stared into her dead eyes and cradled her body in my arms before pulling the needle from her arm. My cries repeated over in my mind, begging her to wake up, for it all to be a dream and then I remembered lifting my hand to her eyes and closing them gently.

“Blackie?”

For a moment I thought it was her sweet voice calling my name but when I lifted my head, struggling for my eyes to focus, I saw it was Reina.

“Oh my God,” she said, rushing towards me. I tore my eyes away from her and glanced down at the offensive needle sticking out of my arm.

I spent the last few years desecrating my liver to save my veins only for it to come full circle. I kept myself alive but numb, telling myself the only reason this life was worth living was to have a chance to right all the wrongs I had done but staring at that needle solidified that I’d never be able to get the penance I craved.

I bent my head, opening my mouth around the needle and pulled the f*cking thing out with my teeth before spitting the empty syringe on the table and untying the band around my arm. I lifted my watering eyes to Reina’s, not giving a f*ck if she saw the pain I tried to numb myself from.

Let her know.

Let the whole world know how f*cked I truly am, how every goddamn thing I do turns to shit.

Masochist.

“Earned your keep, Reina,” I slurred, swaying slightly in my chair as I lifted my hips and pulled my keys from my back pocket. “My car is out front, Ford Expedition. Go find your man,” I said, throwing the keys in the air.

“What about you?”

“Just go,” I mumbled, as I leaned back in the chair and closed my eyes. I surrendered to the heroin, welcoming the numbness, and accepting the fact my life had been over a long time ago.





Chapter Two





There is a little boy who lives in my dreams and forever in my heart, a little boy named Jack Parrish Jr. He was my little brother and I was five years old when I watched him die. Literally, I stood there and did nothing as he ran into the street. I thought I would forget that someday the memory would fade as I became older—yet it seemed to only grow more vivid with every year I aged and he didn’t.