Lawless (King #3)(68)

I really hadn’t thought Bear was going to jump in. An empty threat that turned out to be not so empty.

The spot where Bear had jumped into the water created a rippling effect over the surface, growing larger and larger as it spanned out. By the time it reached the boat it had turned from slight ripple to little wave, rocking the boat from side to side.

That’s when I realized that there was no other disturbance in the water. No indication of movement of any kind.

Where is he? My anger and irritation temporarily replaced by worry.

I counted to ten.

Nothing.

I counted again.

Nothing.

“Bear!” I shouted.

No response.

Keeping one oar raised out of the water I turned the boat around and followed the path from where I came, scanning for signs of life. I’d only gotten a few strokes in when the stillness exploded beside the boat. My heart leapt into my stomach as Bear launched himself through the surface of the water like an orca, soaking my hair and clothes.

“Why do you care? Why are you really mad?” Bear asked, grabbing onto the side of the boat. “Tell me, Ti, and be f*cking honest with me because we both know you can’t lie for shit. Why do you care if I f*ck and snort and drink myself into an early f*cking grave?” Fire danced in his eyes, water dripped into his face and mouth. “Tell me,” he challenged. “Right f*cking now ’cause I need to know.” He lifted a leg over the side of the boat. I held onto the sides to prevent myself from going in as it tipped more sideways then I thought a boat could, letting in a few inches of water. Bear lifted his other leg into the boat and it righted itself again as he climbed in. With limited space he sat behind me on the little bench seat, my back to his chest. His knees splayed out on the side of my hips. I turned sideways to glare at him.

Bear was running a hand over his head, wringing out the access water.

He was also naked.

Completely and utterly, devastatingly and beautifully…naked.

I wanted to hate him and I was pretty sure I did but that didn’t mean that his mere presence didn’t affect me.

Under the light of the moon his tattoos and smooth skin looked as if they were shining, glowing with the same iridescent light reflecting off the water. His chest and arms flexed from the strain of his swim. His ab muscles rose and fell as he tried to catch his breath and I found myself following them where they turned into a V, pointing down to his…

I averted my gaze to the trees. “You win, Bear, whatever you are trying to argue. It’s fine. I agree. You win. Just go!”

“Bullshit,” he said. “I don’t win. I f*cked up, Ti. If this is winning I hate to find out what losing feels like, so please, tell me what it is you think I won?”

It was exactly what I wanted to hear.

It was exactly bullshit.

“You wanted to push me away,” I reminded him. “You wanted to hurt me. Mission accomplished. Now get out of my boat.”

“First off, this is my boat. I built it with King and Preppy when they first bought the place, so if anyone is getting out, it’s you. Second, I tried to push you away. I admit it, even convinced myself that I wanted to do it. I thought it would be better if you hated me. I thought you would be better if you hated me.” His eyes met mine. “And part of me still thinks that’s true. But nothing about the look on your face felt like I was doing the right thing. The reality of you hating me was nothing like I thought it would be.” His voice grew quiet and his words sank further into the barrier I had a hard time keeping up around him. “It gutted me, Ti.”

Don’t listen. He’s lying. Don’t believe him.

“I know the feeling,” I said, the words dripping with the bitterness I felt.

Don’t listen. He’s lying. Don’t believe him.

“Here I thought you were being an *, but really, you just couldn’t push her hand from your dick fast enough?” I snapped. “Makes total sense. Please, by all means, continue,” I said sarcastically, resting my chin on my closed fist and leaning toward him to hear the rest of his ridiculous lies. The breeze picked up blowing my hair over my shoulders. Bear reached over my shoulder and grazed the side of my neck with the back of his knuckles. I shivered as he pulled my hair back around, dragging his fingertips across my skin as he adjusted my hair across my back. “You don’t get to touch me.” I seethed, trying my hardest not to give away the desire coursing through me by leaning into his touch.

“I told myself I can’t have you, but I can’t shake you. Why do you think that is?” Bear asked, his words a whisper against my bare neck. His fingers continuing to dance down the back of my arms despite my protest.

A part of me wanted to turn around and crush my lips to his.

A part of me wanted to drown him in the bay.

I was lost in sensation as my skin prickled to life and a muscle inside of me spasmed out and clenched. It was a war. Desire vs. Anger.

Anger was losing, but I wasn’t ready to give up the fight so easily.

Or so I thought. I’d opened my mouth to argue, yet somehow my brain thought the words and my mouth delivered the message, but I wasn’t fully aware of what I was saying.

Of the truth.

“You can’t shake me because I love you, you f*cking *,” I said. Instant regret and fear slammed into me and I considered jumping into the bay to avoid seeing Bear’s reaction.