Jubilee's Journey (Wyattsville #2)(93)

“Yes,” Olivia agreed fervently, “that’s a good idea.” Before she could rise from her seat, Anita grabbed hold of the conversation.

“I haven’t seen these kids because that’s the way Ruth wanted it!”

Jubilee’s mouth dropped open, and Paul’s eyes shifted from Anita to Carmella then back again to Anita. Neither of the children spoke. Even Ethan Allen had nothing to say, which was somewhat unusual.

“Your sister didn’t want you to see the children?” Carmella asked, her voice now softer, the words without undertones of accusation or anger.

Anita nodded, her eyes filled with tears. When she spoke it was in a small, fragile voice.

“It wasn’t Ruth’s fault,” she said. “She was doing what she thought best for the children.”

“Why?” Carmella asked. “Why would your sister do such a cruel thing?”

“Because she knew what it was like to live with me.” Anita heaved a great sigh, one that came from the depth of her soul, one that carried years of sadness and regret.

No one else spoke. For a long moment there was only silence, a silence that was deafening and painful as it shadowed the table.

Anita twisted her hands together and looked down at them. Without raising her eyes she began to speak again. “Ruth was only nine when it started. I was twelve. At first it seemed like just the ordinary ups and downs of life; then it got worse. I’d have days when the world seemed black as a tar pit, and other days when for no reason at all I’d be crazy happy.”

Everyone’s eyes focused on Anita. Sidney reached across and covered her hands with his. That’s when she lifted her eyes and looked at Carmella.

“I was seventeen when they finally diagnosed me with a schizophrenic disorder.”

Carmella gave an audible gasp. “You poor thing. Isn’t there some medication, something that—”

“Yes.” Anita nodded. “And I take it most of the time. But it makes me feel like I’m wearing heavy boots. The off-and-on times of happiness I had are gone.”

Paul was the one to speak. “Is that why Mama never brought us to see you?”

“Actually,” Anita said, “she did bring you to Norfolk for a visit. You were just a tiny baby, and Ruth was so proud of you. I was having one of my good times, so I grabbed you up and started dancing across the room. At first it was harmless enough, but then it got crazy, frenzied almost. I threw my hands up into the air and let go of you. Ruth screamed like someone had stuck a knife in her heart. She scooped you off the floor, and when you finally stopped crying she said coming to see me had been a mistake. That same afternoon she took the train back home to West Virginia.”

“But wasn’t it just an accident?”

Anita shook her head. “No, that’s the way I get. Sometimes I’ll be mean enough to kill a person, and five minutes later I’ll be crazy happy. Ruth knew what it was like to live with me. That’s why she never wanted you kids to suffer what she’d gone through.”

Jubilee climbed out of her chair and ran to Olivia. “I don’t want to live with Aunt Anita!” she sobbed.

“You won’t have to.” Anita eyes looked like a river of sadness as the tears streamed down her cheeks. “That’s what I came here to tell Miss Olivia.”

Up until now Olivia had thought it would be just the opposite, and she smiled. “I’d be more than happy to take care of the children for you.”

“In this little bitty apartment?” Carmella gasped.

“For a while,” Olivia answered. “I’ve started looking for another place. Unfortunately, this building just isn’t—”

Before she could finish, Sidney asked, “What’s wrong with this building?”

“Nothing is wrong with it,” Olivia replied. “It’s a wonderful place to live.” A thread of nostalgia and sadness crept into her words.

“But this apartment isn’t large enough for three children,” Carmella added.

“No, it isn’t,” Olivia said. “That’s why I’m looking for a larger place, an apartment with three, maybe four…” she sniffed back the sadness creeping into her words, “bedrooms.”

“An apartment?” Carmella said. “Why, an apartment is no place for children. They need to be in a house, with their own bedrooms, friends, a yard to play in…”

Feeling the need to defend Olivia’s position, Ethan Allen said, “It so happens I like it here. Me and Grandma’s real happy.”

“Maybe so, but children need friends—”

“I got plenty of friends. I got friends what chipped in to buy me a brand new bicycle!”

“But your grandmother—”

“Grandma got plenty of friends too. She got so many friends they said I was allowed, even if no dogs and kids ain’t supposed to be here!”

Carmella, now engaging in a conversation with Ethan Allen, smiled. “Well, then why do you and your grandma want to move away?”

“We don’t! Grandma’s willing to do it ‘cause she cares about kids.”

Carmella nodded. “I can see that.” She turned and looked Olivia square in the face. “What if there was another way?”

“Another way?”