Jacked (Trent Brothers #1)(80)

If want could take human form, it just possessed me from head to toe and clouded my every thought. And now I wanted to possess this woman as much as she’d possessed me—inside and out. Gone was the guy who questioned how far I was willing to overlook her drinking binge while freezing his nuts off for two hours this morning shoveling heavy snow and ice.

Those vibrant blue eyes gazed up at me, glistening with anticipation, rimmed with a hint of fear but open to trust, calling on every carnal instinct deep within me to own her heart.

I wanted to dive in, take what I wanted so desperately, but I restrained myself, using her reactions to gauge if I had an open invitation. I had never forced myself on a woman before and I sure as hell wasn’t starting now.

But her soft pink lips parted, her eyes darted from mine, down to my mouth, then back up to seeing right into my wretched soul. That was all the invitation I needed. Her stretching to meet my mouth halfway caused that winded feeling to blast my chest, taking away my ability to breathe.

Excitement flashed through me like a million tiny shards of sheer energy, tensing my muscles, tingling down my spine, driving me to that point where everything and nothing merge and consumes you. The soft brush of her beckoning tongue pushed all of my doubts and lingering fears right out the f*cking window. Nothing in my life had ever felt so right as her lips on mine—

N o t O n e T h i n g.

This woman, this luscious creature, had been haunting my every waking moment and much of my unconscious ones since the moment I met her and by some dumb luck or twist of fate here she was, in my hands like a precious jewel, letting me show her exactly how I’d been feeling but unwilling to admit.

Her teeth scraped over my bottom lip, sucking and pulling and just as hungry, echoing that same sensation right into the depths of my jeans. If just kissing her was this mind-blowing then making love to her would surely be the death of me. I’d been bleeding inside for so long, missing something I couldn’t quite name. It was hard to hide just how desperate I was for her to heal me.

Her fingertips pressed into my sides and curled, tugging and gripping my shirt in bunches. I tangled my fingers into her damp hair, hanging on for dear life, marking her memories so she’d never want to think of another man ever again.

I’d been down for so long, I forgot how it felt to be happy. I’d been doing time, not living it. A prisoner of my own doing. Erin was a breath of freedom and a lifeline of sunshine and damn if she didn’t taste like perfection.

…mixed with my mint toothpaste.

Our kiss slowed, our lips rested, our breaths both came out in pants. It was the best and scariest feeling, like the exhilaration that comes from jumping out a plane and landing in a safety net piled with pillows and knowing you’d survived the wildest ride of your life.

If I go in for another kiss, I’m not coming up for air.

And f*ck being afraid.

Or hesitant.

Or unsure.

I held her jaw, hoping she could see all I wanted to say to her but wasn’t quite ready to say out loud.

Not yet. That would have to wait, and be earned.

But this kiss, it was enough to seal our fate. At least for me it was, because I could see so many unsaid words flashing in her wounded eyes, basically asking the same thing.

Will you hurt me if I let you in?

Can we go forward without being torn apart inside?

I want to want you.

And I’m scared, too.

But I’m drunk on you and I need you to feel this high again because if this is how you make me soar from one kiss, imagine what else we can feel inside.

And yes, you’ve turned this hard-hearted bastard into a poet.

Most of the time, when I’m kissing a girl, I feel nothing. Well, not exactly nothing. More like physical horniness mixed with a bit of deviousness, plotting the quickest way to getting the woman naked and my balls emptied. That had been my only goal since ending things with Nikki. Make no ties with anyone who crossed my path, have no worries. Things were simpler that way. Manageable.

But Erin was different. I don’t know how but I could just feel it inside. I felt different with her, as if she had this invisible hold on me, tethering me with renewed purpose.

The hold Nikki once had had on me was nothing compared to this.

The granite top of my kitchen island was looking to be the perfect height for me to crawl up inside this amazing woman, but I won’t. Erin isn’t the type I want to f*ck and chuck to the curb. I knew that for sure now. All my senses were telling me that would be a waste of a good woman.

A small “wow” slipped out of her wet mouth when I rested my forehead on hers. I had to agree.

I knew I should back up, re-evaluate, slow the f*ck down, but that seemed too far away from her and I just didn’t want that separation yet.

The smile I felt burning on the inside came out on my face.

Part of me considered whether or not I should just toss her over my shoulder, carry her to my bed, and continue this until neither of us could walk or move. My mind had wrapped itself tightly around that single notion. My hard-on definitely loved that idea too, even giving me a standing ovation for being brilliant.

But the weight of her sadness was still lying heavily around her despite having new things fluttering around her busy mind. She didn’t need to say it; I could feel it.

I skimmed my nose over hers, wanting to stay locked together somehow. “Sorry. Couldn’t help myself.”