Into the Light (The Light #1)(75)
Her fingers splayed on my chest before she traced the edge of my jaw. “I wasn’t, but now I am.” Another kiss. I kissed her forehead.
“One more thing about tonight.” I had to tell her this. I didn’t want to wait.
“Yes?”
“When I got home, and again at the couch . . .” I took a deep breath and lifted her face to mine. “I know I gave you the option the other day, but Sara Adams, you’re the wife of an Assemblyman. Don’t kneel. You don’t belong on the ground. I’m perfectly content with your words and the bowing of your head.” It had killed me seeing her grovel. “Do you understand?”
“Yes.” She paused. “I’m just wondering if there could ever be any exceptions. I mean, earlier, you didn’t let me finish . . .”
Laughter bubbled from my throat. “I suppose there can always be exceptions. Get some sleep. It’s been a long day.”
“Good night, Jacob.”
CHAPTER 23
Sara
I nervously waited for Jacob’s return. He’d left earlier than normal this morning for Assembly. He hadn’t mentioned Brother Timothy or Sister Lilith, and I couldn’t ask, but the subject hung in the air like a thick cloud. When I washed my hair this morning, I’d gotten a better idea of how much was left. It was longer in the front, hanging just past my chin, and shorter in back. She’d cut it right at my ponytail tie.
Though I should’ve been listening to Father Gabriel’s teachings, my mind was too much of a whirlwind to concentrate. Before Jacob left he told me that Brother Micah would be in the hangar today, as would others. Apparently they’d picked up supplies while at the Eastern Light, and they needed to be unloaded and driven back to the community. When I asked how they transported supplies, since the larger plane was mostly that soft luxurious cabin, he’d said that under the cabin was a large cargo area accessible from the outside.
Admittedly, it’d taken me a while, but I was getting the hang of asking, not questioning.
I’d recently heard a lesson about the sin of being prideful. It reminded me of Elizabeth’s comment, and I decided it was one of my areas that needed work. Raquel had once said she needed to work on her patience. So it must be all right to have areas that needed improvement, as long as you recognized them. However, instead of working on it, this morning I was relishing in it. I wasn’t prideful for myself; I was prideful for my husband, the important work he did for Father Gabriel and on the Assembly, and mostly his discernment. I’d been ready to accept his correction last night, conceding my transgressions and accepting his judgment. When he’d led me upstairs I knew what was coming, or I thought I did. I said more than one silent prayer that he’d show leniency. Despite the fact that the thought of twenty lashes seemed incomprehensible, once I confessed, there was a peace in knowing it was no longer in my hands. That didn’t mean that I expected what happened. Never in a million years could I have foreseen his contrary reaction.
My face flushed as I thought about last night. It wasn’t as if it had been our first time making love, but to me it had felt that way. How I could ever have forgotten Jacob’s mastery in bed was beyond me. I’d been right when I predicted that he conquered unapologetically and bestowed unsparingly. Maybe it hadn’t been a prediction, but a memory. Either way my body ached—in the best way—with my reminders of last night. Unlike other reminders that I wanted to avoid, the ones I currently experienced could recur every day and I wouldn’t complain. I knew that making love didn’t change our dynamic, but in a way it did. As I made his breakfast and prepared his coffee, I’d realized how much I wanted to please him. Especially if he still supported me with the way I looked. Maybe it wasn’t prideful that I felt, but blessed.
While I debated, sounds echoed from the hangar. I knew Jacob had told me about Brother Micah and the others so that I wouldn’t panic at every noise. Of course it also helped when he mentioned that Brother Timothy would be at Assembly and Sister Lilith couldn’t drive out of the community alone. Though that made me feel better about me, I still worried about him. I doubted he would let their actions go without some kind of confrontation.
I bit my lip wondering if Jacob, an Assemblyman, could confront Brother Timothy, a Commissioner. And what would happen if he did?
As the garage door rose, I hurried to the clock. It was almost ten thirty. Assembly would be over. Hoping this was Jacob, I went to my spot near the door. Briefly I recalled my husband’s words from the night before about kneeling. I wasn’t sure how he did it, but despite my obvious transgressions and his supreme power over my life, he made me feel loved and worthy. I no longer had lingering feelings of resentment about waiting for him to enter. I was happy to do it.
The door opened and my breath hitched. Instead of only Jacob, there were multiple voices. Lowering my chin, I waited.
“Sara,” Jacob said, placing his coat in my arms. “Dr. Newton is here with me. We have a surprise.” He kissed my cheek.
I nodded. “Dr. Newton.”
“Sister Sara.”
Cautiously I walked toward the closet carrying Jacob’s and Dr. Newton’s coats. My mind was a blur of questions. Was this about my eyes? Jacob had changed the bandages this morning, but could the bandages be ready to be permanently removed?
As I began to juggle their coats, a hand touched my shoulder. I spun toward it, immediately recognizing the touch as well as a faint scent of honeysuckle. “I-I thought . . .”