Instant Gratification (Wilder #2)(63)

“You’re worried about him, but you’re still going to leave?”

With a sigh, she started walking. “You don’t understand. After this week, he won’t need me full time.” She didn’t turn back to the truck, but walked across the wild grass in front of the lodge, and he followed.

“So you’re on the part-time daughter plan, is that it?”

“Yes, actually. I am.” She stopped and faced him. “That’s what our relationship’s always been, Stone. Part-time. If I could figure out how to do it differently, I would. But the truth is, the clinic is beyond him right now, and unlike what you seem to be implying, I’m not just walking away. I’m going to have him all set up before I go. I just wish I’d known about his condition sooner.”

Yeah. No way around it, he felt like a jerk for that. “Emma—”

“No, don’t.” There was a light breeze ruffling her hair and she shoved it out of her face. “You care about him. It’s good. It’s good that I know your loyalties are with him. It makes you trustworthy.”

He stared at her, not liking where this was going either. “But not trustworthy for you?”

“Honestly? I don’t know.”

Damn, if that one didn’t hit home. “You know what I think? That you’re using this as an excuse to run scared from whatever the hell it is we’re doing.”

“First of all, we’re not doing anything. We’re both geographically unavailable, remember? And second, you really think I’d use my father’s health as an excuse?”

“I think you’d do anything to get out of here. Away from the emotional roller coaster this place has presented. Compared to us, New York must feel like a dead zone. No personal emotions required.”

“Don’t,” she said tightly. “Don’t get me started. I came here for him. God, don’t you understand that? He needed me and I came.”

“And in return, you don’t need him at all? Is that what you’re saying?”

She let out a frustrated breath and then turned to walk again. “I’m a lot of things, Stone. Anal, obsessive, obnoxiously competitive…”

“Obstinate…”

Her lips quirked. “That, too.” She stopped and let out a breath. Closed her eyes. “You’re right. I’m looking for an excuse to blame you when the truth is, I’m so grateful that you were there that day that I don’t even care why you didn’t tell me. I’m picking a fight because…because I’m a coward.”

“What are you afraid of?”

“Leaving you.”

He let out a breath and stepped closer. “So don’t go.”

“I have to. I am leaving, Stone. I am. I want us both to know that.”

Feeling like he’d swallowed sand paper, he nodded. “I know it, and I want you to know that I didn’t tell you because it was his story to tell, not mine. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I care about him, and I care about you. Very much.”

“Even though I’m going.”

“Even though you’re going.” He forced a smile. “You think if you say it enough times we’ll get used to it?”

“Yes.”

Fair enough. He reached for her, so over fighting with her. They didn’t have enough time left to fight. “Let’s be done rumbling in the parking lot.”

She tried to remain stoic and utterly failed as a small smile crossed her face. “I don’t know. I like to rumble.”

God, he loved her smile. “Let’s kiss and make up instead.” Reaching up, he set his palm on her jaw, then winced.

She pulled his hand down and looked at it. “You have a splinter.”

“It’s no big deal”

“It’s already getting infected.”

“Later.” He tried to lean and kiss her but she slapped a hand to his chest. “Wait here.” She grabbed her bag out of the truck. “Come here. Unless,” she said with a raised brow. “You just want to use a Band-aid or super glue on this too?”

“Ha ha. I’m fine.”

“You will be. I have everything I need right here.” She patted her bag and smiled reassuringly. “And there’s not a needle in the mix, I can promise you.” Without waiting for him, she took his hand again, pulling it closer, turning it to get better light. It also blocked his view of the tweezers she’d pulled from her bag, which amused him. “You think I’m a pansy-ass.”

“No, I know you’re not.” She paused. “I’ve been thinking about what you said last night.”

He felt a very slight tug in his palm. “About…?”

“The letting me inside you thing.” Her gaze lifted from his hand to his eyes. “Specifically the part where I don’t connect.”

“Oh. I like the letting me inside you thing better.”

She laughed, and he felt another slight tug, but then she was leaning in so close that her breast brushed his arm, and he ceased to think at all.

“Did you know when you say it that way?” she murmured. “It sounds…”

Another slight tug, which didn’t bother him in the least since another part of him altogether was once again stirring. “Sounds…?”