In the Beginning (Volkov Bratva #1)(78)

“Then explain it to me. Help me understand.”

For the next few hours, he did just that, explaining everything her could without breaching the contract he had with Mikhail and his associates. Susan tried to be understanding, but all she felt was an overwhelming sadness. She should have noticed the weighty secret he had been carrying over the years, but the only thing she had cared about was what she wanted.

“It’s why,” he said when he finished, “I can’t just tell them no. When your indebted to men like these, they own you until that debt is repaid.”

He looked terribly afraid as he faced her, touching her shoulders to get her to meet his gaze. “You can’t speak a word of this, Susan,” he said with a sudden fierceness that had been absent from his words before. “If you do, they won’t...men like them can’t have loose ends.”

“Cameron...”

“Promise me,” he demanded gripping her just a bit tighter. At her reluctant nod, he sighed and let her go, accepting her word.

After that night, they never spoke of the Volkovs again, but now, two of them carried the secret.

Susan never went to New York again after that weekend and whenever Cameron ventured out of the house in the wee hours of the night, or didn’t come home for days, she knew where he was off to. She didn’t know whether she was better off knowing, or if she could take back her inquiry.

Despite his work creating a strain in their marriage, things began to look up after Lauren was born. Whether the Russian Mob Boss felt sentimental because of his own children, he didn’t call on Cameron nearly as much as he used to.

The changes in Cameron were refreshing, the cloud of despair that followed him everywhere was slowly lifting. When he wasn’t at the hospital, he was home, showering Lauren with attention and was one of the best father’s Susan could have ever wanted.

Then it all started falling apart when Lauren was four. Mikhail called on Cameron more than ever and Susan watched him fall to pieces all over again. It was only about a year later that she had come home to find him...dead.

She knew as soon as she saw him who had done it and for months she lived in fear that they would be coming after her and Lauren. Most people would have relaxed, thinking they were safe, but Susan knew better, so she stayed on guard, watching everything and everyone that came around her and her daughter. She researched everything she could to learn more about the secret criminal organization.

If she needed confirmation of her suspicions, she got it the day Mikhail Volkov appeared on her doorstep.

She begged and pleaded for the life of her daughter, swearing that she was innocent and had nothing at all todo with what he had planned for her. Instead of killing her right out, he merely sat--with giant thugs surrounding him--and offered her a large sum of money. With their connections, Mikhail had been able to add an exorbitant amount of money to the life insurance policy Cameron had taken out years ago. If she signed on the dotted line, it would be a contract between them, swearing her silence to never betray the gift he was extending.

Since that day, she had never seen him or anyone bearing the last name Volkov again...at least until Thanksgiving. Her first instinct was to tell Lauren to stay away from him, but how could she without endangering them further?

Now, it was too late and she partially to blame for everything that had happened to Lauren and to Thomas. Despite the evidence, despite what she knew deep down, she had kept the secrets of the past buried from those she loved the most, but it was time for the truth to come out and she had to face the consequences of that.

“Susan?”

Thomas blinked open his eyes, wincing as he shielded them from the blinding light. She held one of his hands between both of hers, and despite her intention of assuring him he was fine, she was now the one being consoled as he shushed her crying.

“It’ll take more than a punk kid with a bat to take me down,” he said gruffly, giving her a hint of his warm, crooked smile.

Some days she thought she lived for that smile and didn’t know what she would do if she never saw it again, but she had to tell him the truth, even if afterwards, he walked away.

She cleared her throat. “I talked to Lauren, she—”

“How is she?” He asked sounding suddenly alert. “Was she hurt?”

“Just a few bumps. She says I’m fine, but you know how Lauren is. She was more worried about you.”

“She’s strong,” he said squeezing her hand. “Just like her mother.”

“Thomas, there’s…there’s something I need to tell you. Something about—”

“Good to see you’re awake, detective,” the doctor said coming into the room, interrupting Susan.

She sat back to let the doctor check Thomas’ vitals. This gave her another moment to think of how to explain. Thomas’ eyes stayed on her as the doctor worked, that curious glint entering his eyes as his brow furrowed. He had always had good instincts, able to tell when something was bothering her.

Once they were alone again, Thomas shifted into a more comfortable position. They only had a few minutes before the detectives would be in to get his statement.

“What is it, Susan? You can tell me anything, you know that.”

She looked to the door, making sure the detectives weren’t already getting off the elevator. “Not even to the department, Thomas.”