Imperial (Insight #8)(71)
“So where does this leave us?” Silas asked. “Your essence may be a part of me, but I was risen as a Witness and there are guidelines for such a role.”
“Now you can love as you serve both.”
“But if I continue to love Charlie, that still hurts the king you love.”
“If you strike them, it does.”
“Does Draven now have control?”
“I have no idea. Yet, you know the control was not the issue. You needed Charlie to love you.”
“Her heart is vast. She doesn’t have to be in love with me; just love me.”
“Would it not be fair to tell her that she is a means to an end? For her to understand why you need her so?”
“I think she knows.”
“I think not. You have played the guilt card with her.”
He glanced away in shame. “It was not fiction. We had a past. A rather long one.”
“Sometimes the length of the past doesn’t matter as much as the emotion felt in that time. I have witnessed shorter relationships that are vastly stronger.”
He sighed as he sat up further so that we were now face-to-face. “I tried to love her the way Draven loves her. I really did. But I have always been broken.”
“You and your Charlie girl fought hard together, but in the end souls made of one will find themselves, whether they have to become Witnesses, Escorts, Fated Escorts, or whatever title you want to give them. In the end, they are souls of one and they will find each other.”
His eyes squinted as he let out a breath, a sign of obvious pain.
“I meant it, Silas. I am very sorry that you have suffered so, even more sorry that the pain is not over.”
He nodded once as he glanced at the sky. “It is not as bad as it looks, and I would do it an infinite amount of times to guard those I was chosen to.”
A faint smile came to my lips as I glanced to my side and thought of my greatest discovery.
Silas tilted his head to try and catch my gaze. “I know I don’t know the King of Anger, but I can tell you that I see so much of Monroe in you.”
I quickly glanced back to his waiting honey eyes.
“What?” he said with a sly grin. “You didn’t think I knew she was yours? That I knew that you had to be capable of love because you created her?”
I let out a sigh. That was the lesson. When the Cowboy told me our children teach us, he wasn’t talking about Mazing or anyone else in my line; he was telling me to listen to Silas—listen to how he dared me to love from our very first conversation. “I didn’t. Not until this day.”
“I know,” he said under his breath. “When I first saw you, that is why I told you to leave then and I wouldn’t kill you. I could see her in your eyes; hers are darker most of the time, but when she was younger, or when she wakes from a deep meditation, they look like yours.”
That made me smile.
“And though I gave you hell about the mint scent—I didn’t mean it.”
“Her scent is like Vade’s?”
“No,” he said, trying to hold back a smile. “It is a scent like no other, honey and mint, but together it created an aroma that is pure bliss, warm. I’ve never been able to describe it—that is, until I sensed them both on you after my awakening.”
I looked away so I could hide the tears.
He reached for my arm. “I kept her safe, and I’m not going to stop now. I will give you this: knowing that her real mom and dad are watching out for her now will give me a reason to take the first deep breath that I have since she was given to me.”
“Did she ever believe that Donalt was her father?”
“I don’t think so…her mother didn’t either. She gave Monroe to me because she said my energy and scent were near the same. I didn’t get why she thought that, why this lover of a horrid king was handing me their infant Escort, but I knew it was my purpose, that every war before had been fought so I would be strong enough to keep her safe.”
I was reading his thoughts, taking in the images I could see there, wanting to know this child of mine all the more.
“She’s with Charlie,” I whispered.
He nodded once. “That is part of my issue. I know Monroe is a guiding light, and she led me right to her, right to my past—right into a war of hearts.”
“Listen to me. You have the misfortune of having the queen of wrath’s essence within you. This queen often does not see past the turmoil she is in. Even when a sign is carved out by the Creator Himself and handed to me, I still lack the power to read the words He left there.”
“Still?”
“We’ll see,” I sighed. “My point is that my daughter led you to where you are for a reason, and I truly do not believe that it was to find Charlie or to fight the soul she loves.”
“I’m sure you’re right. Monroe knows I’m broken, shattered on the inside. The only time my chest doesn’t ache is when she is near.” He raised his hand. “Wait, that sounded wrong. There is no attraction there. I mean that she is so blissful, so innocent that she makes me forget.”
“Was it her scent?”
“Maybe on an unconscious level. I only really noticed it after you toyed with my nose. I mean, Witnesses can pick up on things like that, but understanding that is an essence is not something I could have done.”