I Belong to You (Inside Out #5)(43)

The thought quickens my pace as I fight the memory of hiding in a closet and peeking out of the door to meet her eyes. Wanting to help her, and being incapable of doing anything about the torment she was enduring except to cry. Helpless. And I can’t bear the idea of being that way now.

Exiting into the hallway, I head for the waiting room with determined strides to find Kara, to find out just how bad this situation with the police is for Mark.

Sitting in a corner that gives her a clear view of my approach and the elevator to my left, she stands the instant she spots me and meets me in the middle of the empty room. “Is something wrong?”

“That’s a loaded question,” I say. “Bullets are flying at me from every direction, and I’m trying to catch them before they hurt someone. I need help.”

Her expression softens. “You want to sit and talk?”

“Yes. Please.”

She motions to the seats with the bird’s-eye view of the elevator, but Mark will see us the instant he comes looking for me. “Can we sit in the corner over there instead?”

Understanding fills her brown eyes and she nods. “Of course.”

Once seated, I get right to the point. “Mark says he’s an official suspect in Corey’s beating. Why?”

She flattens her hands on her knees. “Here’s the thing. I’m under a confidentiality agreement, and no matter how much I want to, I can’t discuss details about Mark with you without his consent.” She hesitates. “And it’s killing me. I want to.”

“That answer really makes me feel like there’s something I need to know.”

She inhales and lets it out, shoving a long lock of brown hair behind her ear. “Okay, look. I’m walking a fine line here and talking about personal impressions, of which I have very few since I’ve barely met Mark. Blake, however, has met with him many times. He says Mark is like he was right after his fiancée was murdered: ‘guilty, driven, and willing to go over the line.’ ”

“That sounds like the Mark I’ve come to know.”

“But he’s not stupid or vicious. Blake doesn’t believe Mark would hurt someone innocent, or someone he sees as a victim.”

“You’re telling me you don’t believe he is responsible for what happened to Corey.”

“Do you think he is?”

“No, I don’t. But I’m not so sure about Ava, and there’s also a man named Ryan.”

“Yes. We know him well. If he’s guilty, he’s covered his tracks well. If we catch Ava, she’ll likely give him up. That’s how it works.”

“So could he have helped her escape for that reason?”

“Yes, but Corey was going to turn in evidence. It seems strange they’d let him go; something doesn’t add up.”

“And he accused Mark?”

“I can’t—”

“If he did, he could have been threatened.”

“We know. Believe me, we’re trying to protect Mark, and not just because he pays us. Blake feels a special connection to Mark. I feel one to you. A person driven for vengeance walks a slippery slope. Blake left the ATF because he knew he was going to kill the man who murdered his fiancée. He would have, if I hadn’t been there—and even then, it was my sister that held him back.”

“Your sister?”

“Yes. She disappeared, and I knew the same man was responsible. If he was killed, I knew I’d never find her. So in the split second where Blake could have killed him, knowing he was breaking the law, he chose not to.”

“Where’s your sister now?”

“She’s been missing for nine months.”

“Oh God. I’m sorry.”

“I haven’t given up; we’re looking for her and the man who took her. But here’s why Blake gets Mark so well. Even with me trying to help Blake heal, with our love, and his fiancée being gone for years now, he still fully intends to kill that man. It’s in his blood like a poison. So please believe me when I say this. You have to pull Mark back before he does something he’ll regret.”

“If you can’t pull Blake back, how can I possibly help Mark? I can help him cope, yes, but we’re not you and Blake. We—I don’t know what we are.”

“I see how that man looks at you. And I don’t need Blake’s opinion to know your influence over him. And he’s protective and possessive, to the umpteenth degree.”

“Protective and possessive are bone deep in that man, and he looks at me like he wants to get me naked, because that’s what he does to silence the demons screaming in his head right now.”

“I told myself the same thing with Blake. And I get it, Crystal. The thought of being a replacement for someone who’s been lost is a strange bird to hear sing. You aren’t sure if the words match the emotions they connect to. I’m sure he’s fighting anything he feels for you, out of guilt, and I don’t envy you this part of your relationship. It’s a painful, guilt-driven path full of jagged edges that will cut you many times over—but it has to be traveled to find out what’s real and what isn’t. No matter what you decide in the end, you are the one sharing this journey with him. You are the one who can stop him from doing what he’s doing.”