How (Not) to Fall in Love(65)

I’d insulted Lucas with a cruel, untrue accusation, so now he was lashing out at me.

I turned away so he wouldn’t see my tears because he was the kind of guy who’d feel terrible if he made a girl cry, even if he was supremely pissed off with her. Even if she’d hurt him first.

His hands gripped my shoulders and whirled me around to face him. His eyes darkened, hiding emotions I couldn’t pin down. Muscles twitched in his jaw.

“We’re going to finish this,” he said, glowering at me.

“Finish what?” I could hardly speak, hardly breathe.

His hands fell off my shoulders and he stepped away from me. “We are going to finish looking at places for you to live. Today. So that you can decide and bring your mom back to the place you like best. Follow me,” he commanded. His Royal Hotness was channeling his inner duke again, barking orders. All he needed was a whip and some hunting dogs yapping at his heels. We walked six blocks without speaking to each other, and then he stopped suddenly in front of a duplex.

“This one is only $550 a month. It has two bathrooms.” He spoke to me like I was a stranger, breaking my heart. Lucas poured on the charm for the guy who opened the door, but none of it spilled over onto me. I went through the motions with perfect politeness, but my mind was reeling.

How much time had Lucas spent trying to find me a place to live? And those signs he’d put up, that he’d joked about? He was freaking amazing. And I was acting like a brat. Like the spoiled rich kid he’d thought I was the first day I met him. What was wrong with me?

I shook the duplex owner’s hand when we left, not even remembering his name.

“What’d you think about that place?” Lucas asked, his voice carefully neutral.

We were like two bombs wired to explode at the slightest expression of emotion.

“It was fine.” Truthfully, I couldn’t remember a thing about it. I’d been too distracted by my thoughts, by my regret at lashing out at him.

“Did you like it better than Mrs. Sandri’s house?”

“What? No. I mean, I like that place the best so far. How many more places?” Desperation leeched into my voice.

“Just one.”

“Good.”

He sighed next to me as we walked to the last place.

We stopped in front of an apartment house. It was small, only four stories high. The building formed a U-shape and each apartment had a balcony overlooking the swimming pool below.

“Some people really like pools,” Lucas said. “I wasn’t sure if you and your mom did.” He sighed again. “Then I saw the pool in your backyard today. I know this doesn’t quite measure up.”

My eyes swam with tears again. “Please don’t,” I whispered. “Please stop.”

“What is it?” He stepped in front of me. He blocked out the sun. “You’re crying.” He looked down at me, his expression stormy.

“No shit, Sherlock,” I said, wiping my eyes. “Don’t worry, it’s not contagious.”

He stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Do you want to skip this place?”

I nodded.

“If I was one of those guys from those damned books you read,” he mumbled, “I’d have a monogrammed handkerchief in my pocket. But I don’t.”

I laughed shakily as I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand, picturing the HRH monogram on his imaginary handkerchief. “So are you secretly reading regency romances, Lucas? Is that why I can’t find the stack I saved at Charlie’s?”

His eyes widened, but then he dropped his gaze and I would’ve sworn I saw the hint of a blush creep up his neck.

“It’s nothing to be ashamed of.” I had to choke back a giggle at the mental picture of him reading about rogues and wallflowers. “I have lots more I can lend you—”

He shrugged, running a hand along the back of his neck. “Okay, so I read one. It was awful.”

“Then you picked a bad one. Next time I’ll pick for you.” I thought of some of the books I could lend him, especially some of the sexier ones, and it was my turn to blush.

“No thanks,” he said. “I’ll stick to my textbooks. I don’t have much time for other reading, anyway.”

I pictured the comic books on his desk and smiled. I felt awful about lashing out at him, especially after all he was doing for me. I took a breath. “I’m sorry, Lucas. For saying that you don’t care what happens to me or my mom.” I glanced at him. “Because I know you do.”

His jaw clenched and he looked away.

“Lucas?”

Sighing, he stared at the ground. “I’m sorry, too. For getting upset about what you said about Heather and me. But it’s not true…” He ran a hand through his hair.

“What’s not true?”

He still wouldn’t look at me. “Never mind.”

I sighed and pulled my jacket tighter around me. “We’re quite a pair, aren’t we?”

His finally raised his head, a ghost of a smile on his lips. “Like a buddy movie gone really bad.”

That made me laugh for real. “Lucas?”

“Yeah?” He watched me, his expression wary.

“I don’t even know how to thank you. The places were great.”