Hot Commodity (Banks / Kincaid Family #1)(61)

But she caught him sneaking some of her sleeping pills. When she asked if he was having trouble sleeping, he tried to shrug it off, assuring her he was fine. But she must’ve known better. He couldn’t do this much longer. He couldn’t smile all the time. So Sienna took matters into her own hands. She slit her wrists.

Again, Cameron found her and carried her to the hospital where they stitched her up. This time, she stayed in a mental institution for six weeks.

He went to see her as she lay strapped to her bed. Crying over her, he asked, "What did I do? What did I do wrong this time?"

She merely looked up at him with dull, lifeless. "You’re trying too hard."

Cameron felt about as helpless as he’d ever felt in his entire life.

When Sienna came back after that, things were different. In the beginning, he’d been fresh and ready to make her laugh and pull her from the depths of her sadness. Now, he walked on eggshells, trying to act normal but failing pathetically. One night, after Cameron attempted to make love to her, but Sienna said she wasn’t in the mood, so he lay beside her in the dark and rubbed her back.

"You’d be happier without me," Sienna murmured after a time.

He was quiet for a moment before answering. "I don’t think so."

But Sienna insisted, "You would be."

From then on, it was a lost cause. Everything Cameron did to make Sienna smile was a hopeless endeavor. She’d just look at him as if she couldn’t understand why he bothered.

The third and final time Sienna tried to kill herself, she finally succeeded. Making certain she wouldn’t fail, she first doped herself up on so much medicine, she probably didn’t even feel phase two, which consisted of hacking out parts of her wrists in chunks.

Cameron found her while she was sawing away on her second arm. He cried out and ran into the bathroom, jerking the blade from her hand to throw it against the wall. He had to repaint three times to get out that stain.

Sienna was already so weak, she merely melted against him. Cameron caught her and lifted her into his arms. He drove her to the hospital and carried her into the emergency room, both of them drenched in her blood. As nurses and doctors came hurrying over, he looked down at his wife’s face. She looked bad. She looked dead.

"Why are you doing this?" he sobbed.

Sienna’s eyes flittered open. "It…needs…to stop."

She tried to lift her hand toward his face, but she only got her bloody wrist lifted a few inches before she passed out. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head, and about four people helped Cameron lay her onto a stretcher. She was unconscious the last moment he saw her, her eyes open but lifeless.

Cameron sat in the waiting room and didn’t bother to call anyone. They’d only get mad at him for running off and marrying a crazy woman. He worried about how long she was going to get stuck in an institution this time. Attempted suicide three times in one year did not look good. He hoped they wouldn’t try to put her away forever. He didn’t want his wife locked away in a nut house.

When the doctor eventually approached him, he got to his feet, expecting the usual. She’s mentally unstable. We’re going to have to keep her for observation, and she’s going to be taken up to the top floor where the crazy people are kept.

But the doctor said none of that.

"I’m sorry, son," he choked out. "We lost her."

Cameron frowned in confusion. "You what?"

They’d lost her, as in, they didn’t know what room they’d stuck her in, right? Then he wondered how in the world they could misplace Sienna. She would’ve been way too weak to go anywhere on her own.

But the doctor’s eyes filled with sympathy. "Your wife’s dead, Mr. Banks."

Cameron blinked and licked his lips.

"Mr. Banks?"

Cameron jerked back to the present and flew to his feet to stare bleakly at the doctor who’d worked on Olivia.

God, Olivia.

Not Olivia.

He thought she was different. He thought—he never would’ve guessed Olivia of all people would try to do this.

Holding his breath, Cameron waited for the news. Was she dead or were they just taking her to the mental ward? God, he needed a drink. He couldn’t imagine a vivacious spitfire like Livy being dead.

Not Livy.

He didn’t know what he’d do if something happened to Livy. Everything with her had been so different than it’d been with Sienna. It’d been better.

"Your wife is checking out at the desk if you want to meet her there, Mr. Banks," the doctor informed him.

Cameron stopped. He realized he’d been holding his breath and suddenly sucked in air. It only made him feel woozier. "She’s alive?" he gasped.

The doctor frowned and eyed him strangely. "Of course, she’s alive. I admit she lost enough blood to warrant a transfusion, but you got her here

in plenty of time to prevent anything serious from happening."

Slumping back into the chair he’d been sitting on, Cam cradled his head in his hands and blew out a relieved breath. The intensity of it nearly made him pass out. He sat for a moment and concentrated on breathing.

She was alive. She was apparently okay. And no one in a white coat was coming to take her away.

He didn’t understand, but he certainly wasn’t going to question it. Olivia was okay. For now, that’s all that mattered.