Here and Gone(48)

Shelley beamed a smile at him from behind the counter, and the sheriff touched his finger to the brim of his hat, before walking to the door. He kept his gaze locked on Danny as he passed the window, heading toward the station.

Danny took his time finishing the sandwich, enjoying every bite. He watched the guesthouse across the street as he ate, wondering about Audra Kinney, what she was doing in there. Going out of her mind, he guessed. He wondered if she’d eaten.

He pushed his plate away, drained the cup of coffee. Right on cue, Shelley appeared at his side once more.

‘You want a look at the dessert menu?’ she asked.

‘No thanks,’ he said, reaching for his wallet. ‘I’ll settle up.’

‘Sure thing,’ she said, turning to go. ‘I’ll get your check.’

‘Wait,’ Danny said. ‘You do takeout?’





24


AUDRA FIRST GOT to know her children in the weeks after she left the hospital. She slept a lot those first few days at home, hours of black punctuated by screaming nightmares. By the third day she had lost count of how many times she had woken gasping for breath, bed sheets knotted around her. She ate hardly anything. On the fourth morning, while Sean was at school and Louise was having a nap, Jacinta knocked on the bedroom door.

‘Come in,’ Audra said, blinking sleep from her eyes.

Jacinta entered carrying a tray laden with buttered toast, a candy bar, an apple, and two large mugs full of coffee. Without speaking, she set the tray down on the bed beside Audra. She lifted one mug and put it in Audra’s hand, lifted the other, and sat in the chair under the window.

‘How do you feel?’ she asked.

‘Like I’ve got the worst hangover in the history of hangovers,’ Audra said, laying her palm on her forehead.

‘I heard you screaming,’ Jacinta said. ‘Mr Kinney wouldn’t let me come into you. But I snuck in when he went to work.’

‘You did? I don’t remember.’

‘I’ve seen it before.’ Jacinta looked down at her coffee. ‘My father was an alcoholic. He had it worse than you when he tried to quit. Hallucinations. He said the devil came to him. Chickens were running around the floor, and the devil grabbed them and snapped their necks. If bad dreams is all you have, then it’s not so bad. It’s been a week since the overdose. You should be over the worst of it now.’

‘At the hospital, they said you found me. You saved my life.’

Jacinta shrugged. ‘I just called for the ambulance.’

‘Even so, thank you.’

‘You should eat something.’

Audra shook her head. ‘I’m not hungry.’

‘You should eat anyway. You’ll feel better. Even just the candy bar.’

Audra reached for it, a Milky Way, and peeled back the wrapping. Chocolate and caramel mixed on her tongue, and dear Lord, it was good. The rest of the bar was gone in less than a minute.

Jacinta smiled and said, ‘Told you.’

Audra took a sip of the coffee, rich and warm, felt it in her throat and stomach, heating her from the inside. Jacinta indicated the bottle of pills on the nightstand, half empty.

‘Are you taking those again?’ she asked.

‘My husband got them for me,’ Audra said, avoiding the question.

‘I don’t think you should.’ Jacinta dropped her gaze. ‘If you don’t mind me saying.’

An empty wine bottle stood next to the pills and a glass with a mouthful left at the bottom. Jacinta looked from one to the other, her expression clouded.

‘What?’ Audra asked.

‘There was a phone call yesterday,’ Jacinta said. ‘You were asleep. Mr Kinney was at work. It was a lady from the hospital.’

‘Sister Hannah,’ Audra said.

‘That’s right.’

‘What did she say?’

‘She asked how you were doing. If you were taking any pills. Drinking anything.’

‘And what did you tell her?’

‘I said I wouldn’t know anything about that.’

‘I haven’t,’ Audra said.

‘Haven’t what?’

‘I haven’t taken any pills. I haven’t been drinking.’

Jacinta pointed to the items on the nightstand. ‘But …’

‘Down the toilet,’ Audra said. ‘Don’t tell Mr Kinney.’

Jacinta smiled and said, ‘I won’t. And I’m glad. He shouldn’t give you those things.’

‘He’s an enabler,’ Audra said. ‘An abuser. He uses them to control me. But not anymore.’

‘Can I tell you something?’ Jacinta said.

Audra nodded. Her stomach growled, and she took a slice of toast from the tray, savored the salted butter on her tongue.

‘I don’t like Mr Kinney. I would have left this job a long time ago, except that I love your children. I really do. With you the way you were, and Mr Kinney never being around, I couldn’t go. They’d have no one if I left.’

Audra swallowed the toast. ‘Thank you. I’m not going to be like that anymore.’

‘Good,’ Jacinta said. Her face brightened. ‘Louise is going to wake up from her nap soon. Do you want to go get her with me?’