Game(52)

I lifted my jeans and stared at the naked woman on my bed. I could go blind and I’d still be able to see her beauty.

An idea came to me.

The riskiest thing I could possibly do, considering who I was and where I came from. But to save Shayna, to save the life that was potentially inside her…

I was going to go above Fiore… and put my life on the line.



~



“What happened? She… Shayna showed me her tits?”

I gritted my teeth and gave a nod. “Yeah. You don’t remember?”

“Goddammit,” Cormac said. He put the coffee mug to his lips and drank. It was black coffee, almost thick as mud. Each sip seemed to bring him more to life. “I don’t believe it.”

“Put it this way,” I said, “if you did remember, there was a good chance I would rip your eyes out of your head.”

Cormac raised an eyebrow. “Hm… I bet they’re nice. Can I see them again?”

“You f*cking…”

“I’m joking, brother,” Cormac said.

I let a few seconds pass. There was a bottle of aspirin on the table, tipped over, pills scattered. I wasn’t sure how many he’d taken by now. Hell, he could probably take the entire bottle and eat the damn container and it wouldn’t help the headache he had. I could almost literally see the veins in his head throbbing.

“Hey,” I said. “I’ve only seen you like this once before.”

Cormac looked me dead in the eyes. And his eyes went red.

Ah, f*ck, he was going to cry again.

“Today was the day,” Cormac said.

“What day?”

“The last day I saw her alive.”

My stomach sank. I felt like someone punched me. If today was the last day Cormac saw Carrie… that meant we were…

“Christ, it’s that time again,” I whispered.

We were five days away from the anniversary of her death. It hadn't even dawned on me.

“Aye,” Cormac said. “Remember, Finn? I saw you two and I had that fight in Reno. On the way back…”

“I remember,” I said.

“Do you? Huh?”

“I f*cking remember.”

Cormac pushed the coffee mug out of the way and pointed at me. “I don’t t’ink you do…” The Irish anger was building. “You don’t… you always spend the day with me, brudder.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. “Fiore had Shayna attacked. Someone tried to… tried to force himself in her.”

“Jesus Christ,” Cormac said.

“That’s what I’m dealing with, bro. I would never forget. Not Carrie. Not what she did for me. What she gave us, Cormac. Okay?”

“I’m not angry with you. I’m angry…”

With Shayna?

Cormac pointed a finger to his own chest. “I’m angry with me.”

“Why yourself?” I asked.

“You moved on.”

“Moved on?”

“You love that woman in there. Christ, Finn, from the second I saw you two together. That was goddamn trouble. She put her life on the line without knowing you, brother.”

“You took me to that fight,” I said. “I should be mad at you for all this.”

Cormac grinned. “Fuck that. I believe in fate. You know that.”

“I know. Too much.”

“Hey. I got nothing but fate. Fate took Carrie from us. Why? I don’t know. Maybe she was there with me when I got bashed in the f*cking head behind the arena that one time by that crazy guy, huh? Maybe she lessened the blow and I survived. How many times do you have a close call on the road? Some * runs a light or speeds by or something. It’s all fate. Maybe Carrie was meant to bring us together for this and then watch.”

“How do you think that makes me f*cking feel?” I asked. “I’m in love with someone else. And it’s different, Cormac. The way I feel about Shayna. It’s goddamn different.”

“Because it’s true.”

“What I had with Carrie was true.”

Cormac grabbed my hand. “I know, brother. I would never doubt that. I’m telling you that I’m okay with it all. You go and love her. You make her everything you want. I’m mad at myself for not seeing that sooner. For not pushing you. For not finding it out for myself.”

“You will. You’re a good man.”

“I’m a fate man, Finn. It’s all fate. Live today, die tomorrow, it’s all fate.”

“So getting dead drunk and driving…”

“Aye. That was stupid. But fate brought me here. She was with me, Finn.”

“You really are a crazy son of a bitch, Cormac.”

“Aye,” he said. “Now go love that woman.” He grabbed his coffee mug and drank some more. “Oh, Finn?”

“What?”

“If yer not going to love her the right way, then at least let her show me her tits again.”

I made a fist and showed it to Cormac. Then I started to laugh.

I had to laugh.

Everything was so wrong, so f*cking bad, I just had to laugh.

Cormac laughed and the world felt at ease again.