From Ashes (From Ashes #1)(73)
Pulling on the first clothes I found, I started to head out when I had another thought. I walked into our bathroom and had to pull in a few deep breaths through my nose when I noticed her stuff missing. Turning, I walked to the spare room and had to grip the frame of the closet door when I realized she’d cleared out most of her clothes.
“Damn it!” I roared as I raced out of the house and to my truck.
I was at Starbucks in no time and rushed in without even turning my truck off.
“Jesse!”
He turned, his face clearly confused. “Gage, man, what’s going on?”
“Is Cassidy here?” I asked breathlessly even as I rounded the corner to go into the back.
“No, that’s why I’m asking you what’s going on. She called about forty-five minutes ago, said she was leaving for California with some guy named Tyler. Do you know who he is and why the hell she’d just up and go to California?”
That stopped me dead. Cass hadn’t just left me. She’d left me for Tyler and she’d gone back to California. To what? His parents’? Why wouldn’t she have just stayed with him? None of that mattered right now; I felt like I was going to be sick again at the thought of losing Cassidy for good this time, and once again to my cousin. “You’re sure?”
“What?”
“Jesse, are you sure that’s what she said?”
“Yeah, now what the hell’s going on?”
I couldn’t answer at first, I just sat there staring at nothing. “It’s just what she told you; Cassidy—Cassi’s gone.” God, she was really gone. I wanted to fly to California and beg her to come back here with me, but she’d made her choice, and honestly, I’d had Cassidy leave me too many times for me to believe she’d come back to me again. A part of me hoped she wouldn’t, because I knew in the end she’d just end up leaving again. Just like Tyler said she would, and I’d be in the same f*ckin’ heartbroken spot I was always in.
“Well, why did she go?” Jesse no longer looked confused; he was glaring accusingly.
“I don’t know,” I called over my shoulder as I turned to leave, “she told you more than me.”
Before I got all the way out the door my phone started ringing, and I almost threw it across the parking lot when I saw Tyler’s name.
“What?! Christ, Ty, I swear if you called me to throw all this in my face, we are done. Forever, you got that?”
“I’m not, and I don’t have a lot of time, man, Cassi’s gonna come back from the bathroom and getting food and she’s gonna be pissed if she knows I called you.” He let out a hard, fast breath and started mumbling to himself, “I can’t believe I’m about to do this for you. I can’t f*ckin’ believe it . . .” Then with a deep breath in he said quickly and quietly, “Look, Gage, by the way you answered the phone, you’ve already figured out she’s gone. So I don’t have to tell you that part, but I don’t want you to think she just left you. My dad called me early this morning to tell me Cassi’s house burned to the ground, and as far as everyone can tell, her mom and Jeff were in the house still.”
“Shit,” I hissed under my breath. But if that happened, why didn’t she wake me? Yeah, there were still a couple weeks of school left before graduation, but I would’ve dropped everything to have been there for her.
“Yeah, look, Cassi isn’t torn up about it, but she needs to be in California right now. I didn’t know until I was on my way that she wasn’t going to wake you, and I’ve tried to talk to her about it but every time I do she starts to slip away. You know what I’m talking about when I say that, right?”
I did. Her mask. My least favorite thing in the world. “Yeah, I know.”
“Bro, as much as I hate it . . . swear to God I hate you two together more than almost anything, but I hate seeing Cassi like this more. It was worse when we got back from the ranch last year, like a hundred times worse, but right now she’s so focused on numbing herself because of what happened last night that she’s able to hide a lot of what she’s feeling right now.” He paused for an intense few heartbeats before continuing more slowly. “Even with that, she’s miserable. She’s wearing one of your shirts, Gage, and every five minutes like clockwork she smells the collar; I don’t think she even realizes she’s doing it. I’m sure her leaving without saying a word killed you, that’s why I called—”
“She left a note,” I interrupted, and pulled the small piece of paper out of my back pocket to read it to Tyler.
“God, Cassi, that made it so much worse than it had to be,” Tyler mumbled, more to himself than anything. “Listen, I was already thinking this, and after hearing what she wrote, that’s classic Cassi. I know what she’s doing, Gage. She’s scared; this is what she does when she runs away. She’s not running from your relationship, and I don’t know if she would have even left period if I hadn’t called about her mom’s house. So just focus on that; she’s not running from you, she’s running from her past and fears, ’kay?”
“I don’t know, that’s not what it feels like.” I climbed into my truck and rested my head against the hand that was gripping the steering wheel. “You called it, Ty, you said I would do something like this to her.”