Forsaken (The Secret Life of Amy Bensen #3)(67)

“No. It means they were making sure she never got into real trouble. I did a lot of years in Special Ops. With an unknown toxin, time is considered critical. And we acted quickly, and so did they—not to mention Liam’s a huge donor here. He’ll have a lot of pull to get her whatever she needs as fast as it can be received. I know you don’t trust any of us, and in your shoes, I’d feel the same, but Liam Stone’s a good man and he loves your sister.”

“Chad!”

At the sound of Amy’s voice, I turn to find her running toward me, and I want to wring Liam’s neck for bringing her here when she should be hiding somewhere, protected. Safe. I fully intend to say as much, but she flings herself at me, hugging me, and I am so damn glad she is alive and well that I hold her and don’t let go.

“How is she?” Amy asks, leaning back, hugging herself, and shivering. “I left my coat at the coffee shop.”

My mind flashes back to the bathroom, to Gia curled against me. So cold, she’d said, and now I’m cold straight to the bone, yet somehow my frozen heart is being painfully thawed.

“Chad.” I jolt again at the sound of Amy’s voice, looking down and realizing her hand is on my arm, and I’ve spaced out while Liam f*cking Stone has all but painted a target on her chest by bringing her here. “Are you okay?” she says, sounding worried. “Is Gia okay?”

“Gia wasn’t good when they took her back.”

“Do you know what drug she was given?”

“Not yet,” I say.”

Amy stares at me a long moment. “You love her.”

Love. I repeat the word in my mind, but it settles in my chest, heavy. Painful. “Love isn’t a word I’ve allowed myself to use with anyone but you in a very long time.”

She studies me several beats. “But the possibility is there and won’t go away.”

“We barely know each other,” I argue, though she is right when there’s every reason for her to be wrong.

“And yet somehow she feels more right to you than anything has in six years. That’s how it was for me with Liam when I met him. It was illogical. It was terrifying because of all the reasons I had to fear strangers. But it wouldn’t go away. And I didn’t want him to go away no matter how many times I told him I did.”

“Yes, well, I’m not you. I don’t deserve peace, and Gia doesn’t deserve this world any more than you did.”

“You deserve peace, Chad. You do. You do.”

“I got us into this.”

“No. I know more than you think I do. I overheard conversations and I’ve gathered some information. Dad borrowed money. Sheridan extorted him. Mom slept with Rollin, and I lived with knowing that by convincing myself that it was to protect Dad. And you started working for The Underground and tried to help. Sheridan’s the monster, not you.”

“I see Jared’s been running his mouth.”

“I needed answers. I deserve answers.”

“I know that, Amy, but I’d prefer to be the one to give them to you. And you’re right. Dad borrowed money from Sheridan to fund dig sites. Big sums of money he should have known better than to borrow. But I didn’t know Dad was in trouble when I started working for The Underground. I did it for the high and the money I wanted. I even took jobs for Sheridan when Dad told me Sheridan was trouble. But when I tried to pay off Dad’s debt, Sheridan insisted I do another job for him. He wanted me to find something for him that seemed innocent enough.”

“Until it wasn’t.”

“Right. And once I knew what I had, I wasn’t sure who to give it to and I’m still not. I think they knew, and it’s speculation, but I’m fairly certain Rollin threatened Dad to get into Mom’s bed and try to find out more about what I was doing. When he pressured me I told him I couldn’t find what he wanted. He said someone from The Underground said I did.”

“The Underground betrayed you?”

“I never told anyone about that job. Someone lied for the payout. And I promise you, if I knew who, they’d be dead.”

Her brow furrows. “I’m confused. Who helped me hide, then?”

“A friend.”

“So the tattoo wasn’t for The Underground?”

“No. It was just a tattoo we got together one night out partying.”

“Where is he now?”

“Dead, Amy. Everyone close to this dies.”

“Oh God. Chad, I don’t understand. If Sheridan thought you didn’t have it, why kill him and burn down our house?”

“He must have believed I had it, and thought I was selling it to someone else.”

“But . . . then he made sure he’d never get it either.”

“I know. I’ve spent six years trying to make sense out of it. There is none.”

“I need to know what it is. I need to feel like I have a reason to keep fighting this fight.”

I reach up and stroke hair behind her ear. “And you deserve that and so much more. It’s a cylinder the size of a pencil eraser that would make enough clean energy to make all other sources of energy unnecessary.”

Looking confused, she asks, “Isn’t that a good thing?”

“Yes and no. It would crumble industries and governments. It would make the one person who holds it in their hand capable of demanding anything. Doing anything.”