Flying Lessons & Other Stories(40)
What a loser. My grandmother was born in Georgia.
He’ll never know that.
“All right, Monkey,
Here’s your question:
What city does my grandmother live in?”
WAIT! City? NO FAIR!
You only said the state. GEESH!
This is not going to end well for me.
THERE’S LIKE TWO HUNDRED
cities in Georgia.
I’ll never get it right,
Unless…
“Angel, to be fair,
you should tell somebody
besides Carla the answer
so they can prove that I
got it when I answer it correctly.”
Stalling. What a loser!
Angel whispers to some boy
who’s in the orchestra with me.
I stare her down and hear it plain and clear.
The hallway full of students sings the Jeopardy! theme song and awaits my answer.
I try to make it look good, believable.
“Well, let’s see. You talk with a little country twang
so it’s gotta be a southern state.
Not Atlanta or some other big city, else you would be bragging
about your summer vacations. So it must be some really small town in Alabama or Louisiana that you’re not too excited about.”
I don’t believe this. No way. There’s no way he’s gonna get this.
“Time’s up, Geek. What’s your answer?”
“I’d have to say Savann—No, I think your grandmother resides in the same city that gave us the Godfather of Soul, James Brown. She lives in Macon, Georgia.”
Jay, the guy who plays tuba in the Orchestra, starts running down the hall, flashing
the paper Angel wrote
the answer on, and screaming, “HE GOT IT! HE GOT IT! MONK’S RIGHT.”
People are yelling and laughing.
Angel stands there in disbelief,
looking like Mr. Olley’s twin.
I GOT THAT FEELING
“Angel, is he right?” Carla asks.
“He must have cheated or something. You cheated, didn’t you, geek? How’d
you know where my grandmamma lives?”
But how could he cheat?
He was standing in front of me
the whole time!
“Tell you what, Angel. Since you think I cheated, let’s try it again. Double Jeopardy.
If I’m wrong, I do your homework
for the rest of the year. If I’m right, you, uh, go to see the new Star Wars with me and Hervé this weekend.”
I couldn’t believe I’d said that.
But I was happy I did, and I prayed
that my “powers” wouldn’t leave me
before I got a chance to seal this deal.
The hallway fills with chanting:
DO IT!
DO IT!
DO IT!
“Angel, girl, come on, let’s get out of here.
He’s some kind of weirdo.”
Yeah, she’s probably right, but I got something
he can’t ever know.
I’ll write it down, but I ain’t whispering
the answer to nobody either,
’cause he probably
can just hear
real good.
DO OR DIE
“All right, Monk, you think you’re so cool, but you’re a fool. I’m happy to let you do my homework
for the rest of the year.”
(Hey, at least she didn’t call me stupid. That’s progress, right?) The hallway is silent, crickets, when she asks her question: “How much did my mom pay to get my hair braided?
Including tax.”
She takes out
a piece of paper, writes the answer,
folds it up, gives
it to Carla, and walks up to me till our noses almost touch.
“No cheatin’ this time.
What’s the answer? How much?”
The hall is silent, like somebody just took
the last shot
in a basketball game.
Will it go in?
I think we all know the answer to that question.
Well, at least I do!
YES
I don’t know why this happened to me.
I could guess
and say maybe it was some kind of cosmic prank, or the universe paying me back for so many years of being uncool.
I don’t
know for sure, but it sure felt good and right, and my life would never be
the same
again.
Oh, please don’t get this.
Please, please. I already told Justin
I’d go see Star Wars with him
this weekend. I gotta pee baaaad!
I knew the answer as soon as she wrote it.
I heard her repeating it
and reassuring herself that there was no way I could know.
I watched her,
looked in her eyes, glassy with fear, and
for a second I felt sorry for her,
and I guess the nice, geeky guy in me took over, because I leaned into her, and I whispered…
THE END
“Look, I like you, and I would like to go see a movie
with you someday, but only if you really wanted to, and plus I’ve kinda already got plans with my Chewbacca Crew to see it on Saturday, and you and I both know