Fireblood (Frostblood Saga #2)(41)

“It was a draw,” he corrected as we followed Master Dallr through a shaded walkway and into the school. “And yes, I am upset that you ruined my doublet.” He leaned toward me, his breath warm on my ear. “What are you going to do to compensate me for my loss? You don’t have any Sudesian coin yet, so…” His smile and the twinkle in his golden-brown eyes suggested several alternatives.

“Why did you wear it here if it’s so precious?” I turned my gaze ahead, fighting the heat that rose to my cheeks. It was annoying how easily he could make me blush.

“I didn’t expect to fight you. And when I did agree, I didn’t expect you to be so good.” There was unmasked appreciation in his tone. I smiled at that.

“You underestimated me.”

“It won’t happen again, little bird, I assure you.”

We passed a black lacquered door with two burly masters positioned on either side. “What’s in there?” I whispered to Kai.

“The masters’ library,” he whispered back. “Where all the secrets of the universe are found, or so they say. More likely it’s full of rotted parchment. Master Dallr wears his key around his neck, the show-off.”

My heart did a little reel in my chest. I was so close! Pernillius’s Creation of the Thrones might sit only a few yards away, holding the answers to the Minax’s destruction. Part of me wanted to rush the guards and break through the doors. But I’d likely just end up in prison. No, I needed to become a master so I had access to it for as long as I needed to find the right information.

At the end of the corridor, we entered a spacious room with arched openings to the corridor, the structure reminding me a bit of Forwind Abbey. But whereas the abbey was bleak and gray, the school’s warm yellow stone seemed to soak up and reflect the slanting sunlight.

Master Dallr gestured for us to sit on jewel-bright cushions on the tiled floor as he took his seat in an upholstered chair with gilded armrests. It was clear from his saturnine demeanor that the school was his kingdom and this was his throne.

He studied me for a few moments before speaking. “The queen sent a message that you wish to take the trials.”

“Yes.” My pulse, just calming from the fight, picked up speed again.

“And you want this of your own free will?”

I met his eyes squarely. “Yes.”

“Why?” he shot back, the question almost a command.

I paused. “I want to learn the skills you can teach me and gain control over my gift.”

“And what will you do with that control and that skill?”

That was a harder question. I glanced at Kai, but he just looked forward resolutely, calmly. As if it was obvious. As if he’d been born knowing the correct answer to that question.

“I will use those skills to serve the queen,” I said, aware of how vague that sounded.

“Forgive my candor, but you were not born here. Why do you wish to serve the queen? What would make you want to dedicate your life to serving her?”

Reasons flitted through my mind. What would convince the skeptical master? After a few seconds, he shook his head. “If you are to take the trials, you must know the answer deep in your bones. If you must think before answering, you are not ready.”

The walls and floor radiated stored heat from the sun, and my nerves further heated my skin. I hooked a finger around the damp strands of hair that had come loose from my braid and pushed them behind my ear. As I did so, Master Dallr’s eyes fixed on the left side of my face.

“Where did you get that mark?” he asked abruptly.

Instinctively, my fingertips moved to cover the heart-shaped mark.

Dizziness hit. Everything slowed, sight and sound fuzzing, a tingle sliding up the back of my neck. As I blinked, the world shifted.

My hands gripped the railing of a ship as I stared into the churning froth that slid against the hull. My stomach roiled. I was so ill. So tired. Tired of fighting the impulses, the urge to hurt people around me, which stole my sleep and made me shut myself away for hours at a time until the feelings were under control. How much longer could I survive this? How much longer could I pretend? I swallowed and gripped harder, closing my eyes. I had to make it to land, at least. But even then, I had to hold on until I could—

A warm hand on my wrist made the image blur. A soft voice said my name. I blinked and shook myself. Master Dallr regarded me intently, his brows slightly furrowed. He had asked me a question. About my scar. I opened my mouth, but no words came out. His frown deepened. Kai watched me, too. I knew they were waiting for a reply. The Minax marked me and told me I was its true vessel. It promised to return when I was filled with despair. I am the Child of Light or the Child of Darkness, or neither, and no one knows and I don’t want to know. I never want to know.

I couldn’t say any of that. I could barely admit it to myself.

I was suddenly furious, with the Minax who kept sending me these bizarre visions and with myself for being unable to control them, to shut them out. This was my chance to enter the trials, and I was ruining everything, making the master doubt me. I needed an answer and it had to be the right one. The scar was from… from…

“A birthmark,” said Kai smoothly, snapping time back into place. “She doesn’t like to talk about it. Something about superstitions in Tempesia.” He waved a hand as if dismissing the northern kingdom and all its silly beliefs.