Fighting Shadows (On the Ropes #2)(73)

I collapsed face first onto the bed, lost in the post-orgasm fog.

I vaguely heard the crinkle of the condom behind me. The next thing I knew, Flint had lifted me off the bed, settling me on lap. He was still sitting on the stool, but he had shifted backwards so his legs had room between the stool and the mattress. His chest was to my back, and one of his arms was wrapped tight around my waist.

“Close your legs and put your feet on the bed,” he ordered, lifting me to hover over his waiting cock. He guided the tip inside me as I followed his directions. No sooner had my knees touched than he roughly slammed inside me.

“Oh God,” I cried as he filled me deeper than ever before.

He folded his other arm over my chest so his forearm rested between my breasts and his hand gripped my shoulder. Then he once again lifted me before roughly forcing me back down.

“You do not run from me.” He bit the base of my neck.

“Fuck.” I angled my head to give him more room, moaning with his every nip. “I wasn’t running.”

He slammed into me again. “You will not do that to me again.”

Up.

Then down again.

I dropped my head back against his shoulder, turning to capture his mouth. Flint’s tongue was rough and demanding, and his stubble rubbed against my face.

He released my mouth in order to shift me for another deep thrust.

I was on top, but there was no mistake that Flint was absolutely f*cking me—using his upper body to do the work his legs were incapable of.

“You have completely f*cked with my head. I’m a goddamn mess, waiting for the day when you choose to leave again.”

Up.

Down.

“Ahhh,” I cried as he leaned forward, changing the angle. He wasn’t as deep anymore, but it was even better.

“Rock,” he demanded, kissing my neck.

I threw a hand up, gripping the back of his hair and used the bed as leverage to move against him. My legs were closed tight, and my clit was squeezed with each movement.

“I need to know if you’re planning to stay.”

“Flint,” I breathed.

“Just f*cking tell me!” he yelled, starting a frantic rhythm inside me. His fingers were painfully biting into my hips and my shoulder with every thrust, but his cock was driving me toward the brink of release. “Answer the f*cking question. Are you here to stay?”

“Yes!” I cried.

Planting himself to the hilt, he cursed while his cock jumped and twitched as he came.

Out of breath, he panted, “Say it again.”

“Yes. I’m staying.”

His chest heaved from exertion, but it was his heart pounding against my back that exposed his anxiety. “Swear to me. I need to hear you say it.”

What I said probably wasn’t what he’d expected to hear, but it was more honest than any oath I could have ever made to him.

I wasn’t ready for the rejection I was so frightened I would receive, but I was sick of running from the only thing I’d ever truly wanted to keep.

I’d decided the night before that I was starting over with my life. I was doing it without fear. And hopefully, I was doing it with him.

“I love you, Flint. I’ll stay for as long as you want me.”

His shoulders immediately relaxed, and his hands loosened their grip. “Forever.”

My eyes began to swim even as a smile crept across my face. Reaching up to my shoulder, I placed my hand on top of his and intertwined our fingers. Then I crossed my arm and did the same with his hand at my hip.

“Then I’m staying forever.”

He exhaled a relieved breath. “I don’t know how to trust you.”

“I think that’s something we’re both gonna have to learn, but I’m willing to try if you are.”

“Even if things get bad, Ash, just talk to me instead of taking off. Don’t assume anything. I’m not always going to say the right thing. I’ll probably f*ck up—”

“Flint.” I looked back, interrupting him.

His gorgeous, blue eyes were nervously searching mine.

“Stop talking.” I smiled.

He rested his chin on my shoulder but kept talking. “This whole thing between us is absurd. People don’t fall in love in a month. And they definitely don’t stay in love for three years with no contact. But Jesus Christ, Ash, I love you so f*cking much.”

I swallowed hard, trying to lock away the tears that were threatening to escape.

He loves me.

Me.

“Stop talking,” I choked out.

“I do want to get to know each other again. But I need you to know that it won’t change anything. I love you. I always have, Ash. Always.”

The tears finally spilled from my eyes, but my smile stretched wider.

Always.

“Stop talking,” I repeated through my tears.

He sighed contently. “Did I hurt you?” he asked as he softened inside me.

I knew he was talking about sex, but starting over meant full disclosure. “Yes. When I was sixteen, you broke my heart and said some shitty things that made me doubt who I was as a person. For years, I tried to figure out how to be someone you could be proud of, but ultimately, I just learned to hate part of myself.” I sucked in a deep breath. “Flint, this is who I am. I may be crazy and quirky, but I’m a good person. And that’s something I’m proud of. I can’t worry about what you think anymore.”