Feversong (Fever #9)(131)
He didn’t answer but I didn’t need him to. I’d overheard a conversation he’d had with Ryodan the other day. Due to their origins, somehow, none of them was sure they wouldn’t simply cease to exist the moment the Earth did, no matter where they were in all the galaxies, just like the Fae.
“I’ve had a long life. You haven’t. You love your family. Go to another world. Find a…a husband—” He broke off and that rattle began deep in his chest. His next words came out thickly, around fangs. “Have children. Rebuild the human race. Live all those dreams you used to have.”
“Used to,” I agreed, nipping his full lower lip. “Don’t anymore. Can’t even conceive of them. You’re my dream.”
“You can’t just throw your life away.”
“What I can live with. What I can’t live without. You taught me that.”
“Well, fucking unlearn it!” he exploded with such violence I startled and drew back. “Do you think I want to watch you die?”
“Ditto,” I said coolly. “You don’t get to make my decisions for me. It’s my life and only I know what I need and what I’m willing to go through. I don’t want to live without you. I felt that once. I never want to feel it again.” I’d been lost, purposeless, denied Heaven. It was as if his frequency and my frequency made such an exquisite song together that without it I wasn’t alive.
“You’re being a bloody fool.”
“As if you haven’t been a time or two. Jericho, I’m holding your hand right up till the last. We’ll sit up high on Dani’s water tower, watch the world blink out and blink out with it. I’ll be staring into your eyes at the end. And we’ll smile. And I’m okay with that.” I was more than okay with that. It felt right somehow. I’d found my soul mate. And whatever adventure was coming next, I was meeting it with him. Or drinking deeply of oblivion without him. I couldn’t leave him. It was no longer possible. I wasn’t sure it had ever been.
Neither of us spoke again with words, just our bodies, as we dumped our love and sorrow and need and commitment on each other. We made love and we fucked, we slid together gently and crashed together like two great stones trying to chisel each other into another shape, aware that even if we managed to shave off a few slivers, our fundamental natures would never change. We were what we were.
With him, I was everything I’d ever wanted to be.
He’d brought out the best and worst in me, the most of everything. And when you got to have someone like that, anything less was empty, pointless.
“Jericho,” I whispered against his ear, “thank you. For everything.” I drew back and laughed, feeling inexpressibly light. “It’s been one hell of a ride.”
He smiled at me, dark eyes gleaming. “Rainbow Girl.” He laced his fingers with mine and said nothing for a long time. Then, “We’ll find each other again. Somehow.”
Of that I had no doubt.
SINSAR DUBH
Floors of gleaming bronze turn to sunny yellow.
Yellow will take me swiftly to white marble, to the blank white room, and the mirror to my freedom.
“Mac-KAY-la,” I say in a singsong voice and laugh. “Ready or not. Here I come!”
MAC
I stood by the front door of BB&B and surveyed my store, smiling faintly.
It was perfect.
I’d decided to throw an End of the World party tonight and everyone I cared about was coming.
After the party I would walk my parents and Alina, along with Dani and Dancer—unless they’d decided to go through to a different world—to the portal to New Earth and say my goodbyes. Pretending, of course, I’d be joining them soon.
I’d lied to my daddy. I’d told him I was going to transfer the True Magic. I don’t know that he would have left otherwise.
Then Barrons and I would be virtually the only people left in the entire city, except for Ryodan. The rest of the Nine had gone to other worlds, on the gamble they might survive the end of the Earth to enjoy one last lifetime. Even Kasteo had left, dragging Kat and Sean O’Bannion along with him. I wondered how she was faring. How she would fare when Sean died once the Earth no longer existed. I tried to project her future. If Kasteo survived, would they build a life together on a new world?
The bell tinkled behind me. “Hey, Mac. Where’d you find balloons?”
I turned, smiling, opening my arms to hug Dani, and much to my surprise, she moved into them and actually gave me a hug. A good, warm one. Like she really liked me. I kissed her on the cheek then rested my head against hers a moment. Then I drew back and searched her face intently.
My Dani was fully there, blazing in her emerald eyes. Her hair was a tangle of long red curls and she looked gorgeous in faded jeans, boots, and a leather jacket, sword strapped across her back. I narrowed my eyes. Something had changed. She was different than I’d ever seen her as a teenager or a woman.
“Out with it. What happened?” I demanded as I steered her to the sofa.
She told me.
Everything. Too much, honestly, but she was young and bubbling over with the newness of being in love for the first time. I got details I’d never be able to burn out of my mind. I laughed out loud when she told me how she’d solved her letting-him-get-to-third-base problem. I softened when she’d told me how awed he’d been that she wanted him. I tuned her out when she told me a few things, doing a sort of la-la-la in my brain.