Exaltation (Insight #11)(26)
“In his own miserable way, but not someone who could hurt you. I meant that you were able to distinguish his bad intentions. In the past you haven’t, the twins have.”
Every once in awhile Raven would wake up at night all rattled. She never remembered her dreams but she knew she didn’t want to either. River had bad dreams too, but she told Raven they were just about storms. Right now Raven was questioning exactly what she had suppressed.
“Was I hurt? In the past…did you have to save me?”
He took in a breath. “According to the twins and Soren something came over you and them. You weren’t children in those moments but warriors.” He looked a little deeper in her eyes. “Those bad people were trying to extinguish your soul, but when they started to pull your energy you pulled theirs. You used their power against them.”
No way. “How did I do that?”
“We’re not sure. Aunt Saige feels it was a natural born instinct.”
Raven sat back in her seat and stared, wanting him to say “just joking” or something, but he wasn’t saying it and that made this real. It made Raven focus on the gut feeling she had diligently ignored when it surfaced—the one that told her nothing was as it seemed.
“We didn’t feel it until your battle was already in progress. When we arrived all of you were trembling as you recounted the event in a rush. You wanted to understand what happened, and I explained it as clearly as I could.”
“And I forgot,” Raven said, as she twirled her blonde hair around her finger and stared into space.
“You all did.”
“What did you give us?”
“An herb.”
“Is it going to scare me when I remember?” If it was, Raven was voting on never remembering.
“When it happened you were not scared of what you did, but because you thought you would be in trouble for the damage you’d caused.”
“Did I kill people, Dad?” she asked in a hushed voice.
“Not people, and in some way those that hurt you still have an existence. They’re just not strong enough to hurt you any longer.”
“And this conversation was triggered by me not wanting to take Berries’ class?”
No, it was triggered because Jamison knew there were Escorts at her school. Ones he doubted would strike without warning, ones he knew Raven and the others could defend themselves against. He just wasn’t ready to tell her that, wasn’t ready to explain who the Escort was in his past. How he was trying to figure out how to save him and all those his death would impact.
“It was triggered because you spotted this foe first, and because just before every battle you have had, you and the girls, and usually Soren, turn inward. You plot, conspire, and manipulate circumstances that would normally take you away from trouble. But because of the conformity in the world we live in you didn’t get very far with it. All of you have apparently been doing it for the last four weeks and once again your plans to get away have landed you right where you don’t want to be.”
“You make it sound like a grand scheme. I swear it was as innocent as I told you.”
“I believe you, but I also trust your instinct. I need you to tell me if I should pull you from school.”
“Dad, this is like the last school we could go to.”
“The last school in our city. We can move.”
“No way.”
“I know you like our life here but you have to trust what your soul is telling you.”
“My soul is telling me the Quarter will be the only home I will ever have.”
“We could come back later.”
“I’m not leaving perfection. I don’t feel any bad mojo coming that I can’t handle.”
He was quiet for a long moment. “Well then we’re going to work on your strengths. Open up your mind and help you to see the energy you’re feeling. Help you gain power to move that energy—your vim.”
“Now?” Raven asked as she saw her night going up in flames, no dancing to be had.
“Tomorrow.”
“Don’t you have to work?”
“I want to go over this before you go back to school.”
“I get it. I really do. And I’m not cool with the idea I have no memory of facing bad people or might again. But right now I need to clear my head.”
Jamison tapered his stare on her, not sure that she’d taken any of this seriously. It was always hard to tell with Raven. She stayed too happy to really know. “And you want to do that by going out tonight,” Jamison assumed.
“I do have to kinda work, but besides that I have this routine I want to do.”
“A routine with Soren?”
Raven nodded.
“Is that getting serious?”
She made a face.
“Guess not.”
Chapter Eight
When Jamison dropped Raven off at Emery’s house it was still daylight so all the front shutters to her home were closed. Everyone who lived there had to keep the outside of their homes historically accurate. During the day the doors and windows remained closed so you could see the beautifully aged regal aspect the Quarter had.
Jamison hugged Raven goodbye and told her to make sure her along with the twins and Soren were at Saige’s at one the next day.