Empire of Storms (Throne of Glass #5)(120)
She eased into a sitting position, disbelief and exhausted outrage on that perfect face. She bared her teeth in a silent snarl.
Dorian offered a lazy grin in return. “Believe it or not, this ship has an unnatural number of attractive men and women on board. You’ll fit right in. And fit in with the cranky immortals, I suppose.”
She glanced toward the door moments before he heard approaching footsteps. They were silent until the knob turned, revealing Aedion’s frowning face. “Awake and ready to rip out throats, it seems,” the general said by way of greeting. Dorian rose, taking the tray of what looked to be fish stew from him. He wondered if he should test it for poison from the look Aedion was giving Manon. She glared right back at the golden-haired warrior.
Aedion said, “I would have shot you and your runt of a wyvern clean out of the sky if given my way. Be grateful my queen finds you more useful alive.”
Then he was gone.
Dorian set the tray within Manon’s reach and watched her sniff at it. She took a slow, cautious bite—as if letting it slide into her healing belly and seeing how it settled there. As if indeed testing it for poison. While she waited, Manon said, “You don’t give orders on this ship?”
It was a focused effort not to bristle. “You know my circumstances. I am now at the mercy of my friends.”
“And the Queen of Terrasen is your friend?”
“There is no one else I’d want guarding my back.” Other than Chaol, but … it was no use even thinking about him, missing him.
Manon at last took another bite of her fish stew. Then another. And another.
And he realized she was avoiding speaking to him. Enough so that he asked, “It was your grandmother who did that to you, wasn’t it?”
Her spoon stilled in the chipped wooden bowl. Slowly, she turned her face toward him. Unreadable, a face crafted of nightmares and midnight fantasies.
“I’m sorry,” he admitted, “if the cost of saving me that day in Rifthold was … was this.”
“Find out if my Thirteen are alive, princeling. Do that, and I am yours to command.”
“Where did you last see them?”
Nothing. She swallowed another spoonful.
He pushed, “Were they present when your grandmother did that to you?”
Her shoulders curved a bit, and she scooped another spoonful of cloudy liquid but didn’t sip. “The cost of Rifthold was the life of my Second. I refused to pay it. So I bought my Thirteen time to run. The moment I swung my sword at my grandmother, my title, my legion, was forfeit. I lost the Thirteen while I fled. I do not know if they are alive, or if they have been hunted down.” Her eyes snapped to his, bright from more than the steam of her stew. “Find them for me. Learn if they live or if they have returned to the Darkness.”
“We’re in the middle of the ocean. There won’t be news of anything for a while.”
She went back to eating. “They are all I have left.”
“Then I suppose you and I are both heirs without crowns.”
A humorless snort. Her white hair shifted in the sea breeze.
Dorian rose and walked to the door. “I’ll do what I can.”
“And—Elide.”
Again, that name. “Who is she?”
But Manon was back at her stew. “Just tell Aelin Galathynius that Elide Lochan is alive—and looking for her.”
The conversation with the king took everything out of her. Once that food was in her belly, once she’d downed more water, Manon lay back in bed and slept.
And slept.
And slept.
The door banged open at one point, and she had the vague recollection of the Queen of Terrasen, then her general-prince, demanding answers about something. Elide, perhaps.
But Manon had lain there, half awake, unwilling to think or speak. She wondered if she would have stopped bothering to breathe, if her body hadn’t done it all on its own.
She had not realized how impossible the survival of the Thirteen might indeed have been until she was practically begging Dorian Havilliard to find them for her. Until she had found herself desperate enough to sell her sword for any news of them.
If they even wanted to serve her after everything. A Blackbeak—and a Crochan.
And her parents … murdered by her grandmother. They had promised the world a child of peace. And she had let her grandmother hone her into a child of war.
The thoughts swirled and eddied, sapping her strength, muting colors and sounds. She awoke and saw to her needs when necessary, ate when food was left, but she let that heavy, meaningless sleep take hold.
Sometimes, Manon dreamed that she was in that room in the Omega, her half sister’s blood on her hands and in her mouth. Sometimes, she stood beside her grandmother, a witch fully grown and not the witchling she’d been at the time, and helped the Matron carve up a handsome, bearded man who begged for her life—his offspring’s life. Sometimes, she flew over a lush green land, the song of a western wind singing her home.
Often, the dream was that a great cat, pale and speckled like old snow on granite, sat in the cabin with her, its long tail slashing back and forth when it noticed her glazed attention. Sometimes, it was a grinning white wolf. Or a calm-eyed golden mountain lion.
Manon wished they’d put their jaws around her throat and crunch down.
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