Ego Maniac(80)

I opened the door. “Roman?”

He stood gripping the top of the doorway. “I’ve been instructed to tail you.”

“I thought I saw you at the restaurant today.”

“Can I come in? I won’t take up much of your time.”

“Ummm…sure. Of course. But I should warn you, the place is a mess. I moved my office into my tiny apartment and have no place to put anything, so it’s basically taken over my living room.” I opened the door as wide as I could, and Roman came in. “Can I get you something to drink?”

He held up his hand. “I’m good.”

There were piles of files all over the couch. I started to collect them to make room for him to sit.

“Do you want to have a seat? Get comfortable so you can tell me why you’re following me?”

He chuckled. “Sure.”

I sat down on my office chair across from him and waited for him to begin.

“Drew asked me to tail you. He claims he wants to make sure your new office is in a safe neighborhood.”

“And what if it wasn’t? What’s he going to do with that information?”

Roman shrugged. “Shit don’t always make sense when a man’s in love.”

“In love? Did you miss the part where he dumped me?”

“Never thought I’d say this about my best friend. Known the man since elementary school, and he’s always had balls of steel, but he’s afraid.”

“Of what?”

“Of falling in love. Mother cheated on his father and took off when he was a kid. Wife lied to him about the kid she was pregnant with being his, then continued to screw the baby daddy after they were married. He fell in love with that little boy, then she took being a father away from him. Also gets reminded day in and day out at work how few relationships make it—especially ones where the couples don’t spend time together. Finally found some good in his life with you. I hate to see him throw that away because he’s too afraid to take a chance. Did he even tell you the judge let Alexa stay in Atlanta, and he’s moving there?”

“No.”

There was an ache in my chest. The way he’d ended things made a little more sense now. A part of me could understand why Drew would be skeptical that things could work between us. His past had pretty much taught him that when you fall in love, it gets taken away. But that didn’t excuse what he’d done. Whether he was justified or not didn’t change the fact that he hadn’t even tried to fight for us. He hadn’t even told me what was happening.

“I’m sorry for what he’s going through, Roman. None of it is fair to him. But even if it were true that he still cared about me, what could I do about it? I can’t make him unafraid. He didn’t even want to try. That tells me I wasn’t worth the risk to him. I need to be worth more than that.”

Roman nodded. “I get it. It’s just…I saw you with that professor today at lunch.”

“Baldwin and I are friends. Yes, we have history—or I should say I have a history of feelings for Baldwin. But I fell in love with Drew, and that taught me that the feelings I thought I had for Baldwin weren’t ever really love. Because it was never like this with Baldwin—what I have for Drew is at a different level.”

Roman smiled. “You said have, not had.”

“Of course. I can’t turn off feelings just because I was hurt. It’s going to take effort to move on from Drew.”

“Do me a favor? Don’t start trying too hard yet. I’m still holding out hope my friend is going to pull his head out of his ass.”





Drew



I don’t sweat.

I’ve stood up in court and flown by the seat of my pants when a witness changed his testimony and a judge was staring down his nose at me—nothing. Yet somehow, today I had to blot my forehead, and the paper napkin stuck to my sweaty palms.

Why did I have to do this today? I wasn’t ready. Beck wasn’t ready. But that wouldn’t stop my ex-wife. She’d threatened to tell Beck when I returned him later tonight if I didn’t, and though she wasn’t a woman of her word, I was certain she’d make good on this threat.

It was the second time in as many weeks that I was channeling my father. Rip the Band-Aid off was his favorite cliché. I only hoped my son’s face didn’t look anything like Emerie’s did when I broke things off.

I turned to Beck, who was belly laughing watching cartoons, and looked at my watch. Shit. I was out of time to stall.

“Beck? Buddy? I need to talk to you about something before you go back to Mommy’s tonight. Do you think you can turn off the TV?”

He turned to me, such a sweet, easygoing boy. “Okay, Daddy.”

After he got up and grabbed the remote from the desk, he sat back down and turned, giving me his full attention. My mouth was suddenly dry, making it hard to speak. There was no easy way to break this to a kid, no matter how I padded it.

“Is everything okay? You look like I do before I barf.” Beck stood. “Do you want me to get you a bucket like you do for me when I barf?”

I laughed nervously. “No, buddy. I don’t need a bucket.” At least I don’t think I do. “Sit down. It’s about me being your daddy.”

His face fell. “Are you not going to be my daddy anymore? Is that why you won’t take me home to your house?”