Do Not Become Alarmed(38)

The scarf slipped off her hair and she adjusted it, then turned down a side street she didn’t know. There was a café with small black tables on the sidewalk. She could get a coffee and keep her sunglasses on without looking weird. And the street was tiny and secret.

She was thinking how secret it was when she recognized Nora at one of the tables. Or she recognized the salmon-colored running shoes, the ones Nora wore every day because she never had to go to work. Her long hair was tucked up under a baseball cap. Then Liv registered Nora’s companion. Nora was sitting with Pedro.

Pedro, the joker who’d pretended to be sucked under the river’s surface and scared the shit out of them, and then sputtered up laughing at his own hilariousness.

Pedro, who had not warned them that the tide would change and the motionless river would start running inland, fast.

Pedro, who had not known there were crocodiles.

Pedro, who had brought the frozen daiquiris that had put Liv to sleep.

Pedro, who had taken Nora looking for birds, while their children disappeared. Would you like to see a quetzal? Nora had looked Liv in the eye and told her nothing had happened. And now Pedro and Nora were talking intently over the café table. He was holding Nora’s hand, leaning toward her.

Liv found herself standing over the table. “Hola, amigos.”

Pedro glanced up and gave her an uncertain smile. He didn’t recognize her right away: the scarf and glasses. Nora snatched her hand back from Pedro’s and looked down at her lap, the cap hiding her face.

“So,” Liv said. “The plot thickens.”

“There’s no plot,” Nora said.

“Oh, I think there is,” Liv said. “Do the police know about this? I think they might be very interested.”

“Please don’t say anything,” Nora said, looking up and squinting. “It was just a mistake.”

“A mistake,” Liv said. “That the only two people awake while our children disappeared were fucking?” She whispered it, although there was no one in earshot.

“We weren’t.”

“Oh, no? Everything but?”

“No!” Nora said. Then, accusingly, “You were asleep.”

“Because of his drink!” Liv said. She turned to Pedro. “Was it drugged?”

“No!”

“Was it all a plan?”

“No!”

“Please,” Nora said. “Do you think I could blame myself any more than I already do?”

“I don’t know,” Liv said. “I don’t understand you at all. Why are you here?”

“I just had to talk it through. See if there was anything we missed. See if he knew anything. Just because he’s local.”

“And?” Liv said, looking to Pedro. “Any hot leads? Any clues?”

He shook his head, looking regretful.

“Okay.” Liv turned to Nora. “So you’re having an affair, while our children are missing. That’s what this is.”

“No!” Nora said. “You would be here, too. Looking for the kids.”

“I would not!” Liv said. “Because I wouldn’t have been off in the trees in the first place!”

“Please don’t say anything,” Nora said. “I can’t bear it if this comes out.”

“Then what the fuck are you doing meeting in public? Are you insane?”

“Yes!” Nora said. “Aren’t you? Our kids are gone. Aren’t you a little bit insane?”

“Yes! But not like this!”

“Well I am like this. And it was your fucking terrible idea, the whole cruise, so back the fuck off.”

“We shouldn’t be here,” Pedro said, in a warning tone.

“I’ll leave,” Liv said, and she turned.

“Liv!” Nora said.

Liv tugged at her headscarf as she walked down the tiny street, no destination in mind. Her sunglasses were so big they touched her cheeks. Her tears pooled inside the frames, against the lenses, then spilled down her face to her chin.

Pedro had looked as wretched as they were. She realized Nora was right: She would have met with Pedro, too. Nora could be fucking him now, as far as Liv was concerned, if he could provide information about these feudal families controlling the interior, paying the police, killing people, stealing children. That was the kind of guide they needed.

She kept her eyes on the ground, watching for holes. She couldn’t break an ankle, not now. No tort system, no procedure for wrongs. No recourse for your pain, when it was someone else’s fault.

She regretted being ugly to Nora. She had learned that mode of attack from her mother, and she hated herself when it came out. She should have been empathetic, understanding. Maybe Nora was right, maybe Pedro could come up with something. But she couldn’t bring herself to go back. And they were more identifiable together, Pedro was right.

Poor Raymond, it would crush him. Embarrass him. A new anger at Nora rose up, for making her part of the secret.

A child selling roses tried to press one on her, and Liv held up a hand in protest. But she fumbled in her pocket and gave the girl a coin. It would go straight to whatever adult was pimping the child out, of course.

“Se?ora!” another child called after her, but she didn’t turn.