Deploy, Part One (Rawlings #1)(15)

Right then as a clap of thunder sounded above them, she went to move closer to him but hesitated.

He could have sworn he felt an electric current reach out and kiss his skin, a silent call for him to pull her to him. Her gaze nervously moved to the radio again, another warning had come across but he knew the storm, at least the current cell of storms, was miles away.

A devastatingly handsome smile eased across his face.

“What?” she asked.

“You.”

“What about me?”

“So tough, so righteous...on the surface.”

She swallowed somewhat tensely. “What does that mean?”

“This storm is scaring the shit out of you.” He glanced over her. “Yet, you act like it’s killing you to move closer to me, to hide next to me.”

Was he not there two seconds ago? Was he not the one who moved away?

“And since when did you become a cocky *?”

He brazenly lifted his brow. “When am I not?”

She quieted the adrenaline that threatened to unsteady her voice. “You’re direct, but you have never been cruel to me.”

His smile faded as his gaze searched over her. Yeah, he had. But he couldn’t help it; it was his nature to be defensive toward something he could not understand.

“You don’t know me as well as you think you do,” his tone was quiet.

“I know what you hide.”

He furrowed his brow.

“Underneath all this you’re shy...sweet.”

“Not anymore,” he said bluntly. “And if I remember correctly, I wasn’t all that shy last time you and I found ourselves alone.”

She flushed as her mind and body soared back in time. Declan had been just about every first she’d had, and he had made sure those who came after him hovered in his shadow.

It could’ve been because she was so young, because he was a dare, or because it was her first experience, but it felt different with him. She was aware, locked in a moment, a world with him.

“Is this the part where we compare notches on our bedpost?” she asked. “Where I get to hear about all your conquests, and the ones you plan to have?”

Declan swayed his head side to side. Even if it was, he doubted he could remember another girl’s name right about then. “This is me telling you I’m not sweet. And when I want something I’m not shy about taking it.” He leaned forward a bit. “This is me telling you the silent treatment you gave me in the past was one of the smartest things you’ve ever done.”

“Me?” she said, pointing to herself, forgetting the storm for the moment.

This boy had been her first friend, her first kiss, her first touch, and her first heartache. She liked to think the heartache was a true gift. The pain taught her how to wear an armor of indifference in public, to hide the torrid emotions ripping her insides up. It had helped her on more than one front in her life, a million times over.

“Every time you kiss me you don’t talk to me for months, if not longer!” she snapped. “Might as well kiss me now, that way by the time you come back ‘round I can at least say ‘welcome home’ without you growling at me, or looking at me like I ate your breakfast.”

It took a lot of effort for Declan not grin at the invitation and the boldness in her words, but he managed. At best a determined glint was in his gaze. “You ignored me.”

“I’m not doing this,” she said with a shake of her head just before she flinched at the sound of another rumble.

“What? Coming over here after you told me to kiss you?”

“I didn’t—whatever. Back then you acted like I was a regret and that sucked. But I’m not going to toss this at you before you leave. I don’t remember the end unless I need a reality check.”

Now he was intrigued.

Declan thought to tell her he had to be distant around the Rawlings’ boys because of Nolan’s take, but then thought better of it. To outsiders it sounded boorish.

He arched a brow. “The first one doesn’t count. We changed the game with it, you couldn’t be my buddy any more because I don’t kiss my buddies.”

“Like the second one didn’t change the game?” Then she grinned devilishly. “Oh that’s right, it wouldn’t have for you because I was just the closest girl to you that night. For me it changed.”

Declan tilted his head to the side. “You better watch it, you’re the closest girl to me tonight, too. Us man whores have to go with what we got.”

Justice’s glare sliced deep, making him regret every word...to some degree. She needed to know she was far too tempting to him and he was by no means innocent or looking for any tie he didn’t need.

“It meant something,” he said, after a long tense moment. “You should know that.” He paused. “Still...then and now neither one of us need something this real.”

Right then, she wasn’t sure if it was the thunder or her heart that was making her entire body feel like it was quaking. Only Declan Rawlings could offer a sentiment and rejection across three sentences.

“I guess that’s best since you’re leaving town.”

“Right,” he said as his gaze dipped over her once more.

Thunder crashed above, and she flinched.