Demand (Careless Whispers #2)(59)

“Everything was smooth.” He smirks. “Niccolo was so pissed about the champagne that got dumped on him, he was distracted during our departure.”

“Why was he even there?” I ask, taking another bite of my cereal.

“That’s a good question I’m working on answering,” he says.

“Can I help you work on it?” I ask. “I’d really like to get more involved, Kayden. I can’t hang out in the castle every day.”

“According to Adriel, you don’t intend to.”

“He told you I want the store.”

“Of course he told me,” he confirms dryly. “He wants to go back to hunting, and he’s all but packed Giada’s bags.”

“I have some ideas on how to make that happen. But, most important, are you going to let Adriel hunt again?”

“Once we decide how to deal with Giada, yes. I am. He’s ready.”

“What does that mean? He’s ready?”

“Adriel was a renegade, trying to end up like Enzo for the six months after his father died. He f*cked everything that moved and took every job he knew might get him killed. Giada going off the deep end gave me an excuse to ground his ass, so she’s pissed me off, but she saved Adriel. For that, I’ve been patient, but I’m out of space to give her.” He holds up a hand. “But I really f*cking do not want to talk about that woman tonight.”

“Can we go back to the store, then? Is it mine? I’m learning Italian, and I can use the store to get to know the neighborhood crowd. And I could hunt for things for the store, and who knows how I might be able to help you in the process.”

“You aren’t hunting.”

“But—”

“No.”

“Kayden—”

He turns our chairs to face each other, his hands settling on my legs, surprising me when he doesn’t repeat the word no but says, “Give me time.”

I am instantly softened, reminded that he has stepped into my circle of demons tonight, but his still exists. They’re still breathing fire on him and me. “Yes,” I say. “The store only, right now.”

My understanding is rewarded with the warmth that fills his expression. “I brought you in here to show you something, remember?”

“I thought that was just your way of trying to find out if I would cook for you,” I tease, while I’m really starting to wonder if he’s changed his mind about showing me at all.

“Since you opted for cereal, I’m assuming that’s never going to happen.”

“Marabella would be offended.”

“We can’t have that,” he jokes, lifting his jacket from the next chair and removing a white, rather worn, envelope from the pocket. The moment his hands touch it, I swear his energy shifts and darkens.

“What is it?” I ask, suddenly nervous.

He offers it to me, and I take it. “That’s the letter Kevin left in the lockbox with the bracelet. I think it pretty much sums up why I chose to give it to you.”

Stunned, I ask, “You want me to read it?”

“Yes.”

Not sure what to expect, I open it and he says, “Out loud.”

I nod and start reading.

Kayden:

This is for your queen, should you find her. I never told you that I found mine. Olivia was strong and brave, and my biggest fear was her death. So I did something she could never forgive, and she left. A year later she was killed in a car accident and died thinking I was a bastard, when in truth, I was just a fool and a coward. You, like your father, are not those things. Maybe I could have saved Olivia, or maybe I just could have loved her until she was gone. Whatever the case, guilt gutted me every second of the rest of my life. Once the game is over, the king and the pawn really do go back in the same box. In death they are indeed equal. But in life, we are not. In life we are a product of more than our decisions. We are the consequence of how we cope with those decisions, and too often that is fear and guilt. Don’t let it be fear and guilt.

I lower the letter, my chest tight, my eyes burning. “Even as a child hiding in a closet,” Kayden says, coming down on one knee in front of me, “I knew the moment my mother died. My father let out a roar that was from his soul. I’m struggling with all the feelings I know Kevin had, and the pain my father lived in that moment of loss, which was the same emotion. They both felt they failed the woman they loved. I love you, Ella, so I can’t let you go.”

“I love you, too,” I say. “I love you. And if you tried to let me go, I wouldn’t let you.”

“Says the woman who hasn’t experienced just how protective I can be yet.”

“I think I have.”

“You haven’t, but I have a feeling I haven’t experienced the full wrath of your anger yet, either.” He wraps his arms around me. “I have a feeling we’re going to do a lot of that fighting and f*cking, and then making love. But I’m in if you are.”

“I am. Completely in, Kayden.”

His phone rings and he grimaces. “Obviously, I could have timed this better,” he says, pulling me to my feet. “That’s going to be Matteo telling me he’s here with video from the party. Do you want to watch it with us?”

“Yes,” I say, pleased that he’s included me. “Thank you.”